Tumblr. I'm not sure if I've seen this here, but lemme know if it has and ill get rid of it.. rebuking Ewen ere a true men' s kid hha peasant fer We earlie it o
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Tumblr

Tumblr. I'm not sure if I've seen this here, but lemme know if it has and ill get rid of it.. rebuking Ewen ere a true men' s kid hha peasant fer We earlie it o

I'm not sure if I've seen this here, but lemme know if it has and ill get rid of it.

rebuking Ewen ere a true men' s kid
hha peasant fer We earlie it
omg you can' t call kid If you were Born in 1348
you elem even remember the plague, grad.
...
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Views: 56092
Favorited: 92
Submitted: 04/23/2013
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#3 - mattdoggy (04/24/2013) [-]
>be young man in the century of our Lord 1300's
>stuck as a meager archer keeping an eye upon the peasantry
>while my mind wanders to what it would be like to feel a maiden's bosoms
>out of nowhere so manner of demon or spell has beset my nether region and has caused part of me to turn to lumber
>i immediately hit my knees and try to hide my disgraceful possession and almost immediately hear someone call out my name
>i look up to see it our lord of the land out for a leisurely stroll on a fine stallion
>he asks me what i do in the mud like a serf and i quickly retort "I...w..was just...thanking The Creator for your guidance...my lord"
>he is so pleased with my loyalty and piety that he asks me to be a personal guard at his keep
>everythingwentbetterthanexpected.tapestry
>a fortnight later i am guarding the outside of the treasury late in the dark hours
>i almost am taken to slumber by the night spirits but at the last moment i see a strange figure lurking in the shadows
>"Halt right there criminal scum" i ordered all knight like
>but the criminal attempted to scurry away
>i being quick and noble outsmarted the criminal and cut him off at a yonder hallway
>i tackled him and attempted to pin the criminal but found my efforts to be for nothing
>the individual had skin that felt like it was made entirely of oil and he managed to slip free
>before i could get to my feet i felt a sharp pain in my head and was out
>when i cam to i found the keeps guard with the lord of the land standing over me asking why i was sleeping and had abandoned my post
>mfw i had to tell them i was struck by a smooth criminal
#46 to #3 - jdizzleoffthehizzl (04/24/2013) [-]
Bless your beautiful soul my good man
#66 to #3 - mooghens (04/24/2013) [-]
That post was so brilliant i am gonna convert it to binary, roll it up and use it as a fleshlight for days to come
That post was so brilliant i am gonna convert it to binary, roll it up and use it as a fleshlight for days to come
#64 to #3 - brenton (04/24/2013) [-]
Comment Picture
#23 to #3 - urgnnahaveabadtime (04/24/2013) [-]
i love it
i love it
#24 to #3 - stratosrider (04/24/2013) [-]
Beautiful.
#8 to #3 - abcdxyz (04/24/2013) [-]
Annie are you ok?
User avatar #22 to #3 - vladhellsing (04/24/2013) [-]
10/10, would listen to your tale again, good squire.
#7 to #3 - pedophant (04/24/2013) [-]
******* glorious. 11/10 would read again.
#5 to #3 - nicktheslayer ONLINE (04/24/2013) [-]
11/10

Wonderful
#48 to #3 - zorororonoa (04/24/2013) [-]
.tapestry
.tapestry
User avatar #4 to #3 - pheonixinstinct (04/24/2013) [-]
if this doesnt make top comment then ill stick a dick up my nail
User avatar #26 to #4 - oishiine (04/24/2013) [-]
You what
#14 to #3 - lyingphoney (04/24/2013) [-]
>everythingwentbetterthanexpected.tapestry
>everythingwentbetterthanexpected.tapestry
#36 to #14 - John Cena (04/24/2013) [-]
ASIANS CAN ACTUALLY READ MINDS!!!!!!!!!!!!!
They can hear, and see what you're visually thinking.
This is the absolute complete truth!!!!!

Asians hide their mind reading abilities by a lot of them having completely expressionless faces so they don't accidently show facial expressions when people think things they don't like, find funny, astonishing, etc, and Asians segregate so their not nearly as susceptible to that happening.
Asians also segregate, and are untalkative to avoid accidently saying things that are similar to what people are thinking and going to say.

Try thinking, and visually picturing things that are as wild as you can when you are around Asians, and look for Asians who give people dirty/particlar looks for what appears to be for completely no reason.

PLEASE SPREAD THE MESSAGE!!!!! THE WORLD NEEDS TO KNOW THIS!!!!!
#10 - Cleavland Steamer (04/24/2013) [-]
my favorite greentext ever
#17 to #10 - gongthehawkeye (04/24/2013) [-]
PURIFYYYYYYYY
PURIFYYYYYYYY
#40 to #10 - motosuwa (04/24/2013) [-]
This made my day! I can now go and fail my classes with ease.
#20 to #10 - thechosentroll (04/24/2013) [-]
This image has expired
I don't know why, but I've always found plague doctors cool.
User avatar #32 to #20 - ladyseraph (04/24/2013) [-]
Same here.
#50 to #20 - John Cena (04/24/2013) [-]
check out scp 049
User avatar #63 to #50 - thechosentroll (04/24/2013) [-]
I have.
#49 to #20 - John Cena (04/24/2013) [-]
[url deleted]
0
#41 to #20 - John Cena Comment deleted by shagtastic [-]
#2 - soulrippa (04/24/2013) [-]
Reminds me of this.
#47 to #1 - Hurrrdurrr (04/24/2013) [-]
i 			*******		 love these
i ******* love these
User avatar #60 - welfarekid (04/24/2013) [-]
What a ******* wench.
#13 - John Cena (04/24/2013) [-]
Seen it at least twice before. Though please don't remove it just for my sake
#18 to #13 - John Cena (04/24/2013) [-]
**** off anon.
#21 to #18 - John Cena (04/24/2013) [-]
Shut the **** up angry black man
User avatar #27 to #21 - jimmytwoshoes ONLINE (04/24/2013) [-]
wow... angry ****** be trippin...
User avatar #6 - osm (04/24/2013) [-]
If you were born in the 1300s...!! You'd be dead. get used to it.
User avatar #51 - corso (04/24/2013) [-]
But the plague was over 300 years later...
#52 to #51 - nigthshadow (04/24/2013) [-]
No
No it wasn't
User avatar #53 to #52 - corso (04/24/2013) [-]
I'm stupid. I had the date confused with the Fire of London.
User avatar #54 to #53 - nigthshadow (04/24/2013) [-]
Then I shall forgive you
User avatar #55 to #54 - corso (04/24/2013) [-]
I... I'm sorry.
#56 to #51 - barehype (04/24/2013) [-]
the black death ended in about 1350, it definitely 100% wasn't over 300 years later
User avatar #57 to #56 - corso (04/24/2013) [-]
Really? We already settled this.
#58 to #57 - barehype (04/24/2013) [-]
Because it's impossible that I didn't refresh the page until I posted the comment right? I didn't see the conversation between you and nigthshadow, also such a stupid comment should probably be ridiculed multiple times just for effect
User avatar #67 to #58 - corso (02/28/2014) [-]
Yeah well your face should be ridiculed multiple times.
User avatar #59 to #58 - corso (04/24/2013) [-]
Well excuse me for not automatically assuming that you didn't refresh the page first. You sound like you need a hug.
#61 to #59 - barehype (04/24/2013) [-]
Hugs are pretty good you've got a point there but I'm good atm, i suppose you can be excused
User avatar #62 to #61 - corso (04/24/2013) [-]
*hugs*
0
#42 - John Cena Comment deleted by shagtastic [-]
0
#35 - John Cena Comment deleted by shagtastic [-]
User avatar #38 to #35 - nadastress (04/24/2013) [-]
Every once in a while, the story of an angry black man with fear of telepathic asians is shown to the world of funnyjunk.
User avatar #43 to #38 - arsonice (04/24/2013) [-]
i was just about to say the same, brother
User avatar #30 - eight (04/24/2013) [-]
I wish it was the old days. Simple life, adventures, and swords.
User avatar #29 - miniwilliam (04/24/2013) [-]
******* 20 out of 10, favorited and would love to read again.
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#25 - settantaventi has deleted their comment [-]
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