How can i explain this to an escort with out making her run away? If they take my money and bolt...ive gotta take my money back from her pimp assuredly which means a gun. i dont want that. i dont let people push me around any more, but i don't want that situation at all. id let her leave with $0 if she was uncomfortable and smile and say good bye. but I just know many will take the cash, then leave and make me deal with her pimp to get my money back. since I cannot argue really via speech i seem passive and maybe a push over even though, I will indeed stand up for myself, sold hard for almost 8 years. im not scared of large *******.
I want a nice girl who I can explain this too, who is not misinformed about schizophrenia, and wont think im a murderrer or something uneducated. I know mentioning schizophrenia to an escort you're alone with is a bad idea. i cannot verbally explain this cause, i forget what i meant to say mid topic and cant remmeber it all. my writing is better by far. and escorts don't read essay long emails, or text.
Like, for a 'girlfriend' experience type thing. preferably a girl who does/did hard drugs so I have conversation topic. and she can show me what it would be like to have a girlfriend and the 'sweet things' you're suppose to do once in a while. Being disinterested, doesn't work when you're like me. Girls straight up have told me they lost interest because i seem too cold/disinterested/one track mind about selling/using drugs. basically teach me social skills and **** and act likr a girlfriend.
ill never get to experience it naturally due to schizo. only paranoid schizos get to have relationships. my type, die alone on hard drugs.
so anyone have advice on how I can find a girl, maybe into psychology as a major, who would do the girlfriend experience thing? I am willing to pay, or provide top tier drugs. I am not asking for charity.