For those who need a instructions manual

i tired this but it didn't work cause i'm a girl but i some how manged to summon Satan

Something went wrong. Dick stuck in jet engine. Wat do?

Instruction weren't clear enough.

What do I pull up and down?

Seriously, how fucking hard can it be to spell "masturbate" right? English isn't even my first language and I see this shit all the time and it just ticks me off.

i have found this in a gas station bathroom.

Instructions not clear enough, dick caught in ceiling fan.

I like to do it slowly and elegantly.

That didn't work at all for me.

How to successfully masturbate:

Gather several people into a group and form a circle.
While singing the "masturbate" song, follow the directions.
Put your left leg into the circle.
Put your left leg out behind you.
Put your left leg in again and shake it all about.
Put your elbows at your sides with your hands about shoulder height and do the masturbate, turning clockwise in a circle and alternately raising your hands a few inches.
Stop turning and clap your hands while singing, "That's what it's all about."
Repeat the entire dance, but change the body part to your right leg, then left arm, followed by your right arm, head, and finally your backside.

is that how you do it? because I was smacking it and twisting it and pulling but I just couldn't get it to work. perhaps I shouldn't take advice from the Bopit guy.

Thanks for reminding me.

Why does everyone always spell it with an E? Who the hell crowned you the Master of Bating?

fuuuuuck

the instructions were not clear enough. i got my dick stuck in the toaster