Decisions, Decisions...

Ask them why they are slapping the back of my hand.

I have a GF?!?!

Throw a copy of Call of Duty: Black Ops 2 and watch them brutally fight each other for the ownership of the game

Tell their mom. Which coincidently also happens to be my date.

That's called a high five.

Start laughing hysterically, screech like a pterodactyl, and transform into a potato as I roll away into the sunset.

Tell them Santa isn't real.

pretty much

This.

id be grateful for this situation since in this situation i have a girlfriend

I don't care if your that young. Somebody has to teach you manners.

1. Grab them under one of my arms and carry them to a back room
2. Get someone to fetch me handcuffs, rope, or zip ties to bind them with
3. Get their phones and text their moms that they are all staying at some other friends house
4. Let them know no one will be missing them
5. Make them really scared through all of this
6. Bring out scary equipment (fish scaler, cheese grater, darts, etc.)
7. At this point they should be crying and begging to be let lose and saying they will do anything
8. Tell them only way they can get free is to suck each other off (they came here to get some and that's what i'm giving to them)
9. They will all eventually agree and participate in the act which i will document (blackmail just in case)
10. After they are done i will call 3 hookers and tell them to wait on a certain sidewalk. They are to have suits (which will be tailored to their size) and chocolate ice cream.
11. I will get a limo to take us all to the hookers location with the guys being blindfolded. On the way i will tell them how it's rude to lay hands on a lady and that they deserve to be treated with respect, especially if they might have a boyfriend.
12. I will take their blindfolds off at the drop zone and have the hookers get in with the suits and icecream. I will give the guys 1k in cash to spend and pay the hookers with and will leave them all in the limo.
13. I will instruct the hookers to make them get manditory tattoos or brands that all match each other and to keep them out all night doing crazy things.
14. The next day when they wake up will be the best morning of their life. They are alive having survived a torture experience, got to ride with hookers in a limo, got cash to blow, a friendship bound in terrible secrets and awesome times, and their tattoos will make sure they never forget it. Every time they eat Chocolate icecream they will remember that night. They will also be more upright gentlemen who will respect women and focus on their place in the world

You did what?!?

call their parents

Pick up the first one use him as a weapon to beat the second to death hold the first ones head (he's still alive) to watch as I literally put my fist through the third ones stomach and break his fucking spine. Then I would turn to face the first who is leaned up against the bar barely alive put my finger to my lips and very gently go "shhhhhhhhh" and leave him to deal with the mental fallout of what he's seen. I would visit him in the mental hospital every Sunday to keep the torment he suffered in the front of his mind forever.

1. Assume battle stance.
2. Envoke upon the the wrath of the war song clan.
3. Lok Tar Ogar!