He was just trying to be nice, kind'a like us putting up a bird house. One day, an enormous super hero in disguise from another dimension who specializes in solar system planetary realignment, appeared in our galaxy. He then relocates all our planets into one single orbit around the sun where they all become global Hawaii's. Uranus and Pluto water the other planets via transorbital osmosis. And you've definitely got to get the right amount of spin on a planet to set it right. Then just toss out some more moons where they're wanted and frisbee on a few rings. Every major country or continent will get their own planet. China gets Jupiter. So, when this does happen, it will henceforth be known as Super Bowling Day. Who gets Saturn; USA, Russia, Europe, Africa or South America? Mars would be a trip with wall to wall kangaroos. They're already used to red soil. And who claims and stays on Earth? Maybe we'd give Earth back to nature. A Jurassic Planet Mercury could be sweet. Maybe life will then be good.
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