Mood ring. . My husband, being unhappy with my mood swings, bought me a mood ring the other day so he would be able to monitor my moods. We' discovered that whe
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Mood ring

My husband, being unhappy with my mood
swings, bought me a mood ring the other
day so he would be able to monitor my
moods.
We' discovered that when Pm in a good
mood, it turns green.
When Pm in , beleaves ahig red
mark on his faulting forehead.
Maybe next time he' ll buy me a diamond.
...
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Views: 31619
Favorited: 44
Submitted: 01/13/2013
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#11 - stallwallwriter (01/14/2013) [-]
domestic violence for all your comedy needs!
#9 - darkor (01/14/2013) [-]
#7 - pineapplepeople (01/13/2013) [-]
If he bought you a diamond it would hurt more. Have you tried not being an irritable bitch?
User avatar #2 - basstard (01/13/2013) [-]
I wonder what color is for horny.
User avatar #31 to #2 - ThatsSoFunnyHeHe (01/14/2013) [-]
I used to have a mood ring.
Purple was "Aroused"
It was always purple when I wore it.
User avatar #12 to #2 - brothergrimm (01/14/2013) [-]
honestly.... probably the same as it would be for angry. body heat and all that
User avatar #13 to #2 - evilanakie ONLINE (01/14/2013) [-]
a bright and weird red like angry but REALLY HOT
#22 - andovaredoras (01/14/2013) [-]
>the man's face after that last line..
#15 - VaultTechy (01/14/2013) [-]
That face when;
Women hits man "Hahah! Comedy gold!"
Man hits woman "What the **** , you monster?"

I'm not saying I condone or approve of hitting women at all, in fact I'm a pretty chivalrous guy in my opinion, but what the **** people? Neither is okay in a relationship.
User avatar #28 to #15 - gevaudan ONLINE (01/14/2013) [-]
Husband-beating is pretty socially acceptable in South Korea.
#26 to #15 - shiftyscent (01/14/2013) [-]
My ex-GF used to hit me, throw stuff at me, scratch me and push me.   
MFW when everyone else was okay with this, but went totally berserk because I once pushed her out of my way when she was trying to keep me from leaving the apartment.
My ex-GF used to hit me, throw stuff at me, scratch me and push me.
MFW when everyone else was okay with this, but went totally berserk because I once pushed her out of my way when she was trying to keep me from leaving the apartment.
User avatar #27 to #26 - shiftyscent (01/14/2013) [-]
...When when...
#32 - Lolpop (01/14/2013) [-]
I will give you 2000 souls for that ring!
User avatar #21 - MadCon (01/14/2013) [-]
I've lost my mood ring this morning. I don't know how I feel about this.
#17 - mrtredbear (01/14/2013) [-]
or why don't you stop being a bitch and don't look a gift horse in the mouth.
#19 to #17 - broorb ONLINE (01/14/2013) [-]
mate this joke is old as ******* time, chill out
#20 - broorb ONLINE (01/14/2013) [-]
OH MY GOD GUYS   
IT'S A 			*******		 JOKE   
A REALLY, REALLY OLD ONE   
"Maybe you shouldn't be BITCH, NEERRRR"   
"Oh wimminz are all such slaaaaags"   
IT'S A JOKE   
IT'S MADE PEOPLE LAUGH FOR LIKE 20 YEARS   
GET   
OVER   
IT   
Jesus on a bus you people
OH MY GOD GUYS
IT'S A ******* JOKE
A REALLY, REALLY OLD ONE
"Maybe you shouldn't be BITCH, NEERRRR"
"Oh wimminz are all such slaaaaags"
IT'S A JOKE
IT'S MADE PEOPLE LAUGH FOR LIKE 20 YEARS
GET
OVER
IT
Jesus on a bus you people
User avatar #30 to #20 - brettyoke (01/14/2013) [-]
Ohhh!!! It's funny, cause she's a dumb bitch!
#33 to #30 - broorb ONLINE (01/14/2013) [-]
and you're funny cuz you're a massive virgin
User avatar #34 to #33 - brettyoke (01/14/2013) [-]
Got me. Clearly you are better than me because you don't have your virginity? You don't seem to comprehend that you can't just slap the title "joke" on anything and make it funny. Your "joke" was bitchy and ******* stupid.
#35 to #34 - broorb ONLINE (01/15/2013) [-]
nah darling
it's a joke that's been around since before you were born
just because you can't let anyone else laugh at something you don't funny doesn't mean no one else should either you selfish ass
User avatar #36 to #35 - brettyoke (01/15/2013) [-]
How hypocritical. You say I'm the one trying to keep people form laughing, yet you're the one telling them not to complain (in a rather overdone way). If you can have your opinion that it's funny (because it's old), why can't we have ours that she's being a bitch?
#38 to #36 - broorb ONLINE (01/16/2013) [-]
because SHE ISN'T REAL
OF COURSE SHE'S BEING A BITCH
IT'S A JOKE
How the **** can you laugh at the idea of a baby nailed to 10 different trees but not at the idea of a woman being a bitch? I just don't get how simple people can be
User avatar #39 to #38 - brettyoke (01/16/2013) [-]
When did I laugh to a baby nailed to 10 different trees? Also, I don't find a woman being a bitch to be funny. Yelling "it's a joke, it's a joke!" over and over doesn't make it funnier. I believe I understood that it was a joke the first time. Why don't you understand that a joke isn't funny just because it was trying to be?
#40 to #39 - broorb ONLINE (01/16/2013) [-]
Look, you can chat on all you like, but you're not going to deny the fact that funnyjunk is a massively sexist society. We laugh at everything equally except for women being dicks, because that is NOT ON, while everything else, apparently, is. And that, my friend, is hypocrisy.

It's not that you don't find it funny, it's that you all take women SO ******* SERIOUSLY and perhaps you should just chill out and move on instead of letting your misplaced righteous ass get in your way
User avatar #41 to #40 - brettyoke (01/16/2013) [-]
FJ is mostly a sexist community. You're one of the people that I like to call counter try-hards. You give so much time and effort into being anti-sexist, that you end up acting sexist.

For example, you think that because a girl made this joke, it shouldn't be hated on because "THAT'S SEXIST HURRR." You can't seem to understand that to most people, saying

"I punched him in the head because he got me a mood ring instead of a diamond."

is not funny. I can't think of any situation where it would be funny if a man did that either.
#42 to #41 - broorb ONLINE (01/16/2013) [-]
That's cute honey and I'd agree with you but then we'd both be wrong, keep trying and best of luck in the new year
#43 to #42 - brettyoke (01/16/2013) [-]
So basically, you lost the argument, so you tell me to keep trying and you run away.

Rock on bro.
#44 to #43 - broorb ONLINE (01/17/2013) [-]
nah I just heard a really good quote:   
   
"never argue with a nobody. the farmer doesn't bother telling the pig his breath smells like 			****		."   
   
and figured you know what, arguing with this kid is getting me nowhere and he clearly wants to dwell in his little pit of ineptitude so cheers to him and I'll be on my way
nah I just heard a really good quote:

"never argue with a nobody. the farmer doesn't bother telling the pig his breath smells like **** ."

and figured you know what, arguing with this kid is getting me nowhere and he clearly wants to dwell in his little pit of ineptitude so cheers to him and I'll be on my way
#45 to #44 - brettyoke (01/17/2013) [-]
Believing that you're right doesn't make you right. My final point had disproved what you said. I could say the same for you, but if you're going to be a high and mighty ignorant cocksucker, I'll just move along, sad that I couldn't show somebody as retarted as you how to use common sense.
#46 to #45 - broorb ONLINE (01/17/2013) [-]
hahahaha you're adorable, bye now
hahahaha you're adorable, bye now
#47 to #46 - brettyoke (01/17/2013) [-]
Hahaha, you lose. Bye now.
#48 to #47 - broorb ONLINE (01/18/2013) [-]
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#50 to #49 - broorb ONLINE (01/18/2013) [-]
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#74 to #73 - broorb ONLINE (01/24/2013) [-]
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#72 to #71 - broorb ONLINE (01/24/2013) [-]
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#70 to #69 - broorb ONLINE (01/22/2013) [-]
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#68 to #67 - broorb ONLINE (01/22/2013) [-]
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#66 to #65 - broorb ONLINE (01/21/2013) [-]
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#64 to #63 - broorb ONLINE (01/20/2013) [-]
not gonna lie, I look forward to these
not gonna lie, I look forward to these
#62 to #61 - broorb ONLINE (01/20/2013) [-]
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#60 to #59 - broorb ONLINE (01/20/2013) [-]
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#58 to #57 - broorb ONLINE (01/19/2013) [-]
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#56 to #55 - broorb ONLINE (01/19/2013) [-]
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#54 to #51 - broorb ONLINE (01/19/2013) [-]
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#52 to #51 - broorb ONLINE (01/19/2013) [-]
#3 - anon (01/13/2013) [-]
BACK TO THE KITCHEN BITCH
User avatar #4 to #3 - roelrollx (01/13/2013) [-]
you must have a girlfriend that loves you o' so much.
#6 - anon (01/13/2013) [-]
i read this om my moms facebook wall last month, you fail. aunty acid beat you to this post
#10 to #6 - babyweewee (01/14/2013) [-]
This has been around much longer than that..
This has been around much longer than that..
#24 - shiftyscent (01/14/2013) [-]
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User avatar #25 to #24 - shiftyscent (01/14/2013) [-]
Also, I want a mood-cockring.
I'm sure someone already made this joke but I'm lazy.
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