#80547669 added by jbanana at One photo....many stories

Reply+53

(01/13/2013)[-]

I'm so easily distracted. One day this guy ran into class 10 minutes late, I thought nothing of it at first, but then I realized I couldn't take my eyes off him. At this point I started thinking, Oh lawd I'm turinin' gay! But it was homosex that invaded my mind, it was his shirt... IT WAS ON BACKWARDS. Me being OCD or whatever, couldn't concentrate on class, inevitably failing the quiz we had that day. After class ended it was lunch time, and I was furious at him. I confronted him outside where he and his "possee" ate lunch and chewed him out. In my rage I forgot what I said, but according to eyewitnesses it was something to the tune of: "You cock gargling cunt bagel, I failed the quiz because of your ****** backward shirt!" He proceeded to arm himself for a fist fight, now you must take note that I live in America, and in America we can't get into schoolyard fights without adults making it a federal case, literally. But in my addled anger I heartily agreed and our fight commenced. I don't remember the fight but it was most likely a slap fight gayer than a flying, rainbow colored dick, so it obviously didn't end well. Eventually the teachers showed up and I was so mad that I shouted out "Imma gonna slap your **** you dick face, twat, burger!" The teachers apprehended us, fortunately I was in the right mind enough to stop throwing blows and allowed the faculty to escort me into the principal's office. In the cliched scene I sat in a chair in the hallways waiting for my turn to talk to the principal. After the other boy refused to speak, on account of him stating he'd never bee a snitch, I spoke to the principal, explaining what I remembered from the ordeal. The principal said he'd never heard of such a stupid reason to get into a fight and said it was so pathetic I wouldn't need to go to detention. From then on people knew to dress when in my presence, I AM KING OF THE CLOTHES, RESPECT ME AS RESPECT IS DUE.