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User avatar #106 - wilfredfanforever (01/11/2013) [-]
Give me a Paradox!
#170 to #106 - chucknorrisTHEGAME ONLINE (01/11/2013) [-]
Sorry it's so small, t'was like that when I found it.
User avatar #172 to #170 - chucknorrisTHEGAME ONLINE (01/11/2013) [-]
Here, I typed it out.

A baby girl is mysteriously dropped off at an orphanage in Cleveland in 1945. "Jane" grows up lonely and dejected, not knowing who her parents are, until one day in 1963 she is strangely attracted to a drifter. She falls in love with him. But just when things are finally looking up for Jane, a series of disasters strike. First, she becomes pregnant by the drifter, who then disappears. Second, during the complicated delivery, doctors find that Jane has both sets of sex organs, and to save her life, they are forced to surgically convert "her" to a "him." Finally, a mysterious stranger kidnaps her baby from the delivery room.

Reeling from these disasters, rejected by society, scorned by fate, "he" becomes a drunkard and drifter. Not only has Jane lost her parents and her lover, but he has lost his only child as well. Years later, in 1970, he stumbles into a lonely bar, called Pop's Place, and spills out his pathetic story to an elderly bartender. The sympathetic bartender offers the drifter the chance to avenge the stranger who left her pregnant and abandoned, on the condition that he join the "time travelers corps." Both of them enter a time machine, and the bartender drops off the drifter in 1963. The drifter is strangely attracted to a young orphan woman, who subsequently becomes pregnant.

The bartender then goes forward 9 months, kidnaps the baby girl from the hospital, and drops off the baby in an orphanage back in 1945. Then the bartender drops off the thoroughly confused drifter in 1985, to enlist in the time travelers corps. The drifter eventually gets his life together, becomes a respected and elderly member of the time travelers corps, and then disguises himself as a bartender and has his most difficult mission: a date with destiny, meeting a certain drifter at Pop's Place in 1970.
#159 to #106 - anonymous (01/11/2013) [-]
Who was phone?
User avatar #148 to #106 - portshadow **User deleted account** (01/11/2013) [-]
If you go forward in time, and saw yourself, old, would you remember it in 40 years? But then then, every action you made would be rewriting your memory. So then the future you could, in theory, remember every action you made while simultaneously looking at you. But how, since that time stream is being made up in front of your eyes?
User avatar #187 to #148 - HURLEYSURFERDUDE (01/11/2013) [-]
They explain this occurance in "The Butterfly Effect". Everytime he changes something in the past, his current self was flooded with memories. All of this activity enlarged the memory part of his brain, almost killing him and causing him great pain because it is flooding memories into his mind.
#182 to #148 - shadew (01/11/2013) [-]
Kind of like this.
User avatar #144 to #106 - kobemamba (01/11/2013) [-]
The truth about my lies is I always say truth somewhere in them
User avatar #139 to #106 - algharb (01/11/2013) [-]
Rape me.
User avatar #138 to #106 - Lightclaw (01/11/2013) [-]
The cake is a lie, so have some pie.
The pie is fake, so have some cake.
User avatar #132 to #106 - Marker ONLINE (01/11/2013) [-]
Everything I say is a lie, I am unable to speak the truth.
User avatar #136 to #132 - georgeapg (01/11/2013) [-]
you sometimes lie
User avatar #123 to #106 - biggrand (01/11/2013) [-]
falling up
#120 to #106 - aludin (01/11/2013) [-]
'Nothing' is the smallest pardox ever.
User avatar #113 to #106 - DJKitty (01/11/2013) [-]
If I said there was a rule, that all rules had exceptions, yet the exception to this rule is that this rule has no exceptions, does it have an exception?
#109 to #106 - superacecar **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #108 to #106 - thespacecore (01/11/2013) [-]
If you go back in time, and kill your grandpa before your parents are born, how will you have gone back in time and killed him?
User avatar #149 to #108 - psykobear (01/11/2013) [-]
And that's why most Time Travel show/movies make little to no sense... because of what you just said.
User avatar #133 to #108 - nitrojoe (01/11/2013) [-]
Well, your grandma could have been pregnant already.
User avatar #124 to #108 - dracodiabolus **User deleted account** (01/11/2013) [-]
User avatar #122 to #108 - darcandkharg (01/11/2013) [-]
you will have either just created an alternate reality/timeline or you will simply disappear.
User avatar #150 to #122 - psykobear (01/11/2013) [-]
But, if you disappear, you will not have existed to make yourself not exist.
User avatar #151 to #150 - darcandkharg (01/11/2013) [-]
Alternate realities, thats why I would never go back in time because if you change something, you would most likely never be able to go back to the reality you came from. You would probably be just gone from that reality forever.
#152 to #151 - psykobear (01/11/2013) [-]
You're blowing my mind man!
Without paradoxes!
But with logic!
#110 to #108 - brothergrimm ONLINE (01/11/2013) [-]
Comment Picture
User avatar #117 to #110 - thespacecore (01/11/2013) [-]
What would happen if Pinocchio said "My nose will be growing"?
User avatar #116 to #110 - thespacecore (01/11/2013) [-]
If this sentence is true, then Santa Claus exists.
User avatar #115 to #110 - thespacecore (01/11/2013) [-]
A barber (who is a man) shaves all and only those men who do not shave themselves. Does he shave himself?
#119 to #115 - brothergrimm ONLINE (01/11/2013) [-]
User avatar #112 to #110 - thespacecore (01/11/2013) [-]
If a crocodile steals a child and promises its return if the father can correctly guess what the crocodile will do, how should the crocodile respond in the case that the father correctly guesses that the child will not be returned?
User avatar #180 to #112 - tommygunntyler (01/11/2013) [-]
wtf is happening!?!?!?!?
#118 to #112 - brothergrimm ONLINE (01/11/2013) [-]
Eris? is that you?
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