Lawyers.... So this is your plan?. This was Actually Said.. ti' l' iai'' l This was actually said in court and when from a transcript: Llwymr: "Doctor, Earn you lawyers
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Lawyers.... So this is your plan?. This was Actually Said.. ti' l' iai'' l This was actually said in court and when from a transcript: Llwymr: "Doctor, Earn you

So this is your plan?

Tags: lawyers
This was Actually Said.. ti' l' iai'' l
This was actually said in court and when from a transcript:
Llwymr: "Doctor, Earn you the ah. did you check: for E taba?"
Lawyer: "Did gran for Hand pressure?“
Lawn: "Did you chuck fur breathing?"
Lawyer: ", then it is passible that the patient was alive when you began the
Lunar: "Haw can you be so sure, Duster?"
What: “Because his brain was sitting an my tiktik. in a ian''
Lamar: "But maid the patient have mil been aha "
hut: "TBS, it that he mutt! have been alive and practicing taint
...
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Views: 50483 Submitted: 12/29/2012
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[ 133 comments ]
> hey anon, wanna give your opinion?
asd
#16 - eternalcorn
Reply +56 123456789123345869
(12/30/2012) [-]
this is old as ****
#134 to #16 - IncarceratedNinja
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(12/30/2012) [-]
why do i find this so hysterically funny???
#78 - slashtrey
Reply +47 123456789123345869
(12/30/2012) [-]
seems legit
#42 - Fwimble
Reply +35 123456789123345869
(12/30/2012) [-]
"But could the patient have still been alive nonetheless?"
#64 to #42 - fisheaglee
Reply -2 123456789123345869
(12/30/2012) [-]
**fisheaglee rolls 8,742** Cut off your dick and shove it up your ass then replace your dick with the bannanna, goto the most populated place you can and scream that you hate gays
#143 to #64 - Fwimble
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(12/30/2012) [-]
#87 to #64 - qworta
Reply -1 123456789123345869
(12/30/2012) [-]
y
#8 - dovahsix
Reply +19 123456789123345869
(12/29/2012) [-]
User avatar #14 to #8 - richardastley
Reply +33 123456789123345869
(12/30/2012) [-]
I love content like this. They could somehow cite the case, but instead they go with "This was actually recorded in an actual case in a real court room. This isn't a lie at all."
User avatar #1 - pokemonstheshiz
Reply -84 123456789123345869
(12/29/2012) [-]
You can live without your cerebrum
You'd be in a completely vegetative state, but you could technically be alive.

So it's a mildly valid question, though unlikely. Better to be safe than sorry when you're a lawyer.
#3 to #1 - anon id: 167e9595
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(12/29/2012) [-]
Ah, but the coroner did not say cerebrum, he said brain, which refers to the entire portion of the CNS in the cephalic cavity, including the midbrain and brainstem, which are required for sustained life. Lawyered.

Also, I feel I must point out one of the most missed grammatical errors of all time. It should be "because his brain was sitting in a jar on my desk," not "because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar." The latter version implies that the speaker's desk is inside of a jar, through what is known as a misplaced or dangling modifier.
#5 to #3 - autoxx
Reply +27 123456789123345869
(12/29/2012) [-]
I always enjoy a good dangling modifier.
User avatar #9 to #5 - Kamesakke
Reply +23 123456789123345869
(12/29/2012) [-]
So does your mom.
#18 to #9 - autoxx
Reply +9 123456789123345869
(12/30/2012) [-]
Of course she does, she loves her work....
User avatar #4 to #3 - jarelk
Reply +27 123456789123345869
(12/29/2012) [-]
Did you just let me LEARN something on funnyjunk!?
#12 to #4 - johnshepherd
Reply +8 123456789123345869
(12/29/2012) [-]
#13 to #3 - malacrianza
Reply +22 123456789123345869
(12/29/2012) [-]
#27 to #3 - toyaisle
Reply +6 123456789123345869
(12/30/2012) [-]
Here, take this.
Here, take this.
#65 to #3 - chaoticlaw
Reply -1 123456789123345869
(12/30/2012) [-]
Anon just lawyered a user.

Holy ****.
#41 to #3 - orgasm
Reply -1 123456789123345869
(12/30/2012) [-]
Knowledge?
Knowledge?
User avatar #10 to #3 - foreseeker
Reply -1 123456789123345869
(12/29/2012) [-]
I applaud to you
User avatar #144 to #1 - anonymousperson
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(03/03/2014) [-]
oh no
User avatar #145 to #144 - pokemonstheshiz
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(03/03/2014) [-]
this was a while ago lol
User avatar #146 to #145 - anonymousperson
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(03/03/2014) [-]
just a bit
#31 to #1 - makethingsworse
Reply +3 123456789123345869
(12/30/2012) [-]
User avatar #55 to #31 - pokemonstheshiz
Reply -2 123456789123345869
(12/30/2012) [-]
Nice to see you jumping on the bandwagon

When they put brains in jars, they don't neccesarily include the brainstem, which is the part necessary for life, especially the medulla oblongata which is what regulates heartbeat and breathing and any other ANS responses.
#135 to #55 - makethingsworse
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(12/30/2012) [-]
So you're saying a human body could function with just a brainstem? How about you think about that for a while before responding. Think about it with your BRAIN. Breathe with your lungs that react to messages sent to the BRAIN. Maybe take a **** because your BRAIN recognized the body needed to rid itself of waste.
User avatar #136 to #135 - pokemonstheshiz
Reply -1 123456789123345869
(12/30/2012) [-]
your brain stem controls your automatic responses like breathing and your heart. Which is why you would be in a vegetative state.
User avatar #137 to #136 - makethingsworse
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(12/30/2012) [-]
I don't think you understand. The brain controls the brainstem. If the brain weren't there, the brainstem wouldn't be doing anything.
User avatar #140 to #137 - pokemonstheshiz
Reply -1 123456789123345869
(12/30/2012) [-]
I assume by "brain" you mean cerebrum. In which case, you're wrong. The brain stem can function without active responses from the cerebrum or cerebellum. I'm not sure if it can survive without them being there at all, because I don't think that has been done.
If you're referring to "brain" as the entire system, then obviously because the brainstem is part of it.
#67 to #55 - ohemgeezus
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(12/30/2012) [-]
ITT:pokemontheshiz is a butthurt ****** faggot because an anon just put his punk ass in place.
#69 to #67 - pokemonstheshiz
Reply -3 123456789123345869
(12/30/2012) [-]
it was only a mild discrepancy about what the lawyer meant,  people just flip out when anons say something more than "faggot"   
and if I gave a **** I would just delete my comment
it was only a mild discrepancy about what the lawyer meant, people just flip out when anons say something more than "faggot"
and if I gave a **** I would just delete my comment
#66 - thebigcountry
Reply +24 123456789123345869
(12/30/2012) [-]
Forgive me if I am mistaken.... But to have an autopsy done... Doesn't the person have to be... You know.. Declared dead?
User avatar #68 to #66 - philliyoMLB
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(12/30/2012) [-]
The person giving the autopsy doesn't have to declare someone dead, the victim should already be declared dead earlier by an e.m.t. or doctor of some sort.
User avatar #73 to #68 - thebigcountry
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(12/30/2012) [-]
That's what I meant. There's no real need to check because generally an autopsy is done to find a cause of death. Therefore they would need already be dead for an autopsy even to happen.
User avatar #74 to #73 - thebigcountry
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(12/30/2012) [-]
Already need to be dead*

I accidentally that sentence...
User avatar #139 to #68 - wunderwaffe
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(12/30/2012) [-]
neither EMT's or paramedics can declare a person dead only a doctor can
User avatar #142 to #139 - philliyoMLB
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(12/30/2012) [-]
I did not know that thank you.
#85 to #66 - wehavecandy
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(12/30/2012) [-]
Yes, he needs to declare himself dead first.
#76 - Wazzy
Reply +19 123456789123345869
(12/30/2012) [-]
User avatar #23 - flyingbaconsixnine
Reply -54 123456789123345869
(12/30/2012) [-]
ha ha ha.
classic gag.
#33 to #23 - yoh **User deleted account**
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(12/30/2012) [-]
Comment Picture
User avatar #34 to #33 - flyingbaconsixnine
Reply -25 123456789123345869
(12/30/2012) [-]
ha ha ha.
classic gag.
#35 to #23 - PedoNazi
Reply +4 123456789123345869
(12/30/2012) [-]
User avatar #54 to #23 - dustyshane
Reply +6 123456789123345869
(12/30/2012) [-]
ha ha ha.
classic fag.
#28 to #23 - xozonex
Reply +17 123456789123345869
(12/30/2012) [-]
Getting real sick of your ****
User avatar #29 to #28 - flyingbaconsixnine
Reply -25 123456789123345869
(12/30/2012) [-]
ha ha ha.
classic gag.
#95 - JMF
Reply +12 123456789123345869
(12/30/2012) [-]
Well, I thought it was humorous.
#114 to #95 - shreddddzd
Reply -5 123456789123345869
(12/30/2012) [-]
I bet you also think its humorous to steal my lines don't you?
User avatar #96 to #95 - waterbottlemanboy
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(12/30/2012) [-]
I do not get it. Please explain?
#99 to #96 - JMF
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(12/30/2012) [-]
The doctor is becoming frustrated with the lawyer questioning his ability to determine whether or not the cadaver is actually deceased. He then makes a snide remark stating that the cadaver could still be alive sans brain, and be practicing law somewhere (being a lawyer (brainless)).
User avatar #101 to #99 - waterbottlemanboy
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(12/30/2012) [-]
Okay, thank you, here, take my thumbs.
#102 to #101 - JMF
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(12/30/2012) [-]
#97 to #95 - karnax
Reply +4 123456789123345869
(12/30/2012) [-]
Have this
#100 to #97 - JMF
Reply +5 123456789123345869
(12/30/2012) [-]
#105 to #100 - mrsirius
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(12/30/2012) [-]
User avatar #118 to #97 - karnax
Reply +4 123456789123345869
(12/30/2012) [-]
Well alrighty then.
#115 - anon id: 60a6ee9e
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(12/30/2012) [-]
enjoy all of your red thumbs you 9gag loving faggots
#117 to #115 - anon id: 5cc8053f
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(12/30/2012) [-]
shut up anon.

love, anon
#132 to #117 - odaer
Reply +3 123456789123345869
(12/30/2012) [-]
... so this is what it's like when people say they're bi-polar.