Lawyered. Super Omega repost. but hasn't been seen in like a year or two so why not. also click to enlarge. Iwas driving on Beach Boulevard behind an ancient gu
Home Original Content Funny Pictures Funny GIFs YouTube Funny Text Funny Movies Channels Search

hide menu

Lawyered

Super Omega repost. but hasn't been seen in like a year or two so why not. also click to enlarge

Iwas driving on Beach Boulevard behind an ancient guy in
a beat up mick.
He decides to tum in front of me without a blinker.
I accelerate to swerve and avoid him, and this,
woman Jumps in front of my carwash her
hand up.
She proceeds to yell in my window, "Hey, slow down you
idiot!" I' m a , mellow guy by nature, so I ignore
this.
As [drive away, she yells, "'"""""t" at me again. Twice? I
tum around and drive up next to her.
Do you have a problem?‘ lash:
Yeah, why are you driving like an idiot?"
l was driving like an idiot? How, exactly.‘
You were speeding. Iwatched you."
You were? I see. How did you measure my speed?" [Ever
l heard you."
So, you measured my speed by ear?"
l can hear."
How fast did you HEAR me going?"
Look" she says, "I don' t have to take this. Here comes a
cop. l' ll wave him dowg
THE POLICE? This woman is a trip. She waves him down,
and proceeds to tell him that she observed me speeding.
What happened?" he asks. Ilold him the story, and told
him that I accelerated to an indicated 33 mph tthe speed
limit is 35] to avoid a collision.
Are those mufflers legal?" Ethel asks.
She' s pushing it. I reply, "l have a C. A. . B. exemption for
them." I give the paperwork's the cop.
She tries to find to screw me with. She
says "What about those big tires? They CAN' T be legal." I
began feeling little overheated gears in the back of my
head start to turn.
These tires were available on the 1970 Boss 429, "I told
the cop," Which makes them street legal as a
replacement.‘
Ethel gets angry. She whines, "So you' re not going to
give out any tickets to this 'r'""""'?"
The cop says, "No, I am not.‘
We about had it. So I say, "Sir, this woman told you
that she left the street at the comer, and she met up
with my car here. According to Title 39, pedestrians
have to cross the street at a right angle. This woman
admitted she crossed at a angle, which is a
marketable offense."
What?" The cop looks confused.
Also, she told you that she walked in front of my car
to stop me. A citizen can' t detain someone without
probable cause, under Terry v. Ohio tmy new favorite
case). Since she couldn' t measure my speed, she had
no probable cause to detain me. That is an indictable
offense.‘
The cop says, "But, I didn' t see any of this."
But," I said, " did, and, as an officer of the Court, I can
demand her arrest. I' ll agree to dismiss the Illegal
Detention charge, but Iwant her cited for not crossing at
a right angle and Hazardous Conduct on a Public Street.‘
The cop called his Lieutenant, and after the cop told the
story, he authorized the summonses.
She went home with . 00 worth of traffic tickets, and
they are worth a total ofyour points against her license,
as well as the appropriate insurance surcharge!
BITE“
II MESS WITH ME
...
+1332
Views: 37246
Favorited: 253
Submitted: 11/24/2012
Share On Facebook
Add to favorites Subscribe to heretofuckshitup E-mail to friend submit to reddit
Share image on facebook Share on StumbleUpon Share on Tumblr Share on Pinterest Share on Google Plus E-mail to friend

Comments(136):

[ 136 comments ]

Show All Replies Show Shortcuts
Show:   Top Rated Controversial Best Lowest Rated Newest Per page:
Order:
What do you think? Give us your opinion. Anonymous comments allowed.
#5 - woobumpercars (11/24/2012) [-]
That...

That's legendary.
#44 - inuar (11/25/2012) [-]
bitch deserved it
User avatar #45 - ocelot (11/25/2012) [+] (1 reply)
and you left the poor cop with a mountain range of paperwork to do....
#93 - wherejohnny (11/25/2012) [-]
Loved the story, really did.
And then, the rage face.
#68 - friendlysniff (11/25/2012) [+] (2 replies)
I was so entertained during the whole read... (Could not find "Whoa there charles dickens that was actually a mighty fine story.jpg")
#71 to #68 - lovetolmao (11/25/2012) [-]
Here you go.
#19 - funnyjunkknight (11/25/2012) [-]
Comment Picture
#94 - snaikravdra (11/25/2012) [-]
hfw talking to the cop
#36 - xxxsonic fanxxx (11/25/2012) [+] (2 replies)
op is a dick sucking faggot
User avatar #40 to #36 - drkilliwiggles (11/25/2012) [-]
Shut up Ethel
#7 - heyny (11/24/2012) [-]
Comment Picture
#97 - chubbycharmer (11/25/2012) [+] (1 reply)
Hell yeah!
Hell yeah!
#95 - manymanymangoes (11/25/2012) [-]
Lawyer'd
Lawyer'd
#79 - patchesdacrazy (11/25/2012) [-]
Comment Picture
User avatar #58 - trojanmannn (11/25/2012) [-]
admitted it was a repost. 'spect.
#78 - inboundpotato (11/25/2012) [-]
that's a great story
that's a great story
#54 - damnthatwasgood (11/25/2012) [-]
100000/10 Would read again.
User avatar #24 - zenbass (11/25/2012) [+] (2 replies)
You were driving behind the guy in the truck...then you were the guy in the truck...


wat.
User avatar #26 to #25 - zenbass (11/25/2012) [-]
Wow...I read it entirely incorrectly. Now I feel silly like a jackass.
#23 - tariv (11/25/2012) [-]
YFW
#63 - burraki (11/25/2012) [-]
I liked it..until the ******* rage face; misused might I add.
[ 136 comments ]
Leave a comment
 Friends (0)