Try. I want to hear it.


No pun intended

>Be me, trying earwax removal stuff
>Ear drops clogging my good ear (deaf in one ear)
>Eating away wax. Yum.
>Try to drain it like usual
>Not coming out. Can't hear shit.
>Flush ear with water and dig with Q-tips
>Makes it worse
>OhgodOhgod. Panic.
>Can tell someone is talking outside door
>Lay on bathroom floor, trying to drain ear
>I've broken my ear.
>Start crying
>It's been 45 minutes and I can't unclog my ear.
>I guess it's time to tell mom. She'll take me to the E.R. or some shit.
>Dear God, if you fix this, I will renounce my atheism.
>Drains out. Can hear better than ever
>Just kidding God, it must have been a coincidence.
>Boyfriend dumps me.
.....
>On funnyjunk
>Can't make greentext
>Too long, too boring
>Red thumbs
>Tears
>Ex-Boyfriend runs over my dog.

I should've done the dinosaur thing.

You should have made your ex and dog walk the dinosaur, you would have gotten top comment easily. but good story non the less.

I enjoyed this more than most green text stories, so good job!

... is the last one true?

Not him running over my dog. I thought it would be funny. In a dark, ironic kind of way.

Thats alright then. Glad you got your ear working again!