As a Christian, and regular Bible studier, I can verify - #73750728 added by cometfire at Louis CK

Reply +60 123456789123345869

(11/15/2012) [-]

As a Christian, and regular Bible studier, I can verify that masturbation is indeed natural and in no way against any law or considered a sin, unless you are doing it in a really perverse way. Like spying on your sister in the shower.

Fellow Christians. Masturbation helps relieve sexual tension from our bodies and can help keep us from making mistakes. Like accidental pregnancy. It also promotes healthy hormone and heart health, and can aid in fending off depression. Our bodies are designed to start having sex very early on and back when the new testament was written, you can legally marry by the age of 14 by your own consent and begin a family. We can't do that now because of today's laws in most countries. So the next best thing is masturbation. Hooray~

In short. Masturbation is good.
Keep fapping, my brothers.

#171 to #90 - redJericho

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(11/16/2012) [-]

Masturbation itself isn't a sin, however sexual fantasies are (lust), which commonly follows masturbation.

#154 to #90 - deltadeltadelta

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(11/16/2012) [-]

Catholics consider masturbation a sin because they believe every sperm is sacred. It's also why they believe using condoms is a sin.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=fUspLVStPbk

#153 to #90 - thebigcountry

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(11/16/2012) [-]

Well said sir.

#150 to #90 - tomoyomomo

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(11/16/2012) [-]

I am a christian, Roman catholic to be exact, I go to catholic church, i go to church everysunday, and so do all of my friends.

WE ALL JERK OFF, WE DONT ******* THINK WERE DIRTY SINNERS IN THE EYE OF GOD, CHRIST MAN relax...

#198 to #150 - lickmyteabag

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(11/16/2012) [-]

Did you even read his comment?

#207 to #198 - tomoyomomo

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(11/16/2012) [-]

ehh i stopped halfway through, im lazy, sorry

#225 to #207 - cometfire

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(11/16/2012) [-]

then read the bottom for a sum up.

Take your own advise and chill the hell out.

#226 to #225 - tomoyomomo

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(11/16/2012) [-]

Yea sorry, i ****** up!!

#132 to #90 - malhaloc

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(11/16/2012) [-]

A pro-Christian comment with +20 thumbs? Sir! You are charged with witchcraft and heresy! BURN HIM!

#219 to #132 - cometfire

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(11/16/2012) [-]

Oh here. if you want a bigger one for next time. Thanks for the lawl.

#224 to #219 - malhaloc

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(11/16/2012) [-]

I like bigger gifs

#218 to #132 - cometfire

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(11/16/2012) [-]

#123 to #90 - ahjay

Reply +5 123456789123345869

(11/15/2012) [-]

Sure does cure depression. Masturbated after I had a terrible talk with an ex of mine. Man did I feel better.

#101 to #90 - deadfeds **User deleted account**

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#112 to #101 - cometfire

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(11/15/2012) [-]

OH OH OH! nono Onan refused a direct order. Jehovah was telling Onan to marry his brothers wife after he died so their family would continue, but he disobeyed and jacked off instead.

In the old testament, wasting your seed was bad. You were to marry ASAP and fill the earth with the pitter patter of little feet. But times have changed, laws have changed, and the bibles new testament stands for even todays rules.

#116 to #112 - deadfeds **User deleted account**

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has deleted their comment [-]

#118 to #116 - cometfire

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(11/15/2012) [-]

"cums" from

Ahh you little bastard you XD

#108 to #101 - cometfire

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(11/15/2012) [-]

May I have the passage? I'd like to look it up.

#114 to #108 - deadfeds **User deleted account**

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has deleted their comment [-]

#117 to #114 - cometfire

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(11/15/2012) [-]

could be. I'm finding very little info on it. Honestly to me it sounds like he killed the baby.

but from what this person says the translation is, he was supposed to have sex with her.

Ah whatever. It's the king James wording. I hate that crap.

#100 to #90 - iliketires

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(11/15/2012) [-]

I love you. In celebration of reading this I'm gonna fap to you.

#107 to #100 - cometfire

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(11/15/2012) [-]

Oh you.

#99 to #90 - anon id: 55688817

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(11/15/2012) [-]

Just curious, how do you masturbate without lusting? Even if you're not thinking about sex, you're lusting over your own flesh. Matthew 5, son.

#105 to #99 - cometfire

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(11/15/2012) [-]

Lust is an obsessive sexual desire. Like if you are chronically masturbating, or obsessed about it, then yeah that's kind of bad. I fantasize about my fiance. I've been dating her since I was 12 and she is the only girl [woman now] that I've seen naked. I know..moral fag.

But we're human. We lust, envy, greed, get pissed off, and do all sorts of silly things. None of us are perfect. And it's not our fault.

#102 to #99 - iliketires

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(11/15/2012) [-]

I don't masturbate because I'm lustful, I do it because im bored, or to calm down.

Basically masturbation for me is so I don't murder people.

#92 to #90 - emazegenociide

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(11/15/2012) [-]