Team cock block. Mother, son duo. Today, my brother decided tookin me an my first date. hint unity did he answer the deer with a bat, he alst, got inside the ca block of the cock
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Team cock block. Mother, son duo. Today, my brother decided tookin me an my first date. hint unity did he answer the deer with a bat, he alst, got inside the ca

Mother, son duo

Tags: block | of | the | cock
Today, my brother decided tookin me an my first date. hint unity did he answer the deer with a bat, he alst, got
inside the car and sat next to: my date, pushing me to: the back. He stayed the entire time, and walked me back
bathe house. My mum laughed and gave him . It was a dare. FML
2015121} (34) iagree. year life sucks (598) - yen deserved it (54) .
On / lit/ ii) at 10: must: by 15 () United States (Indiana)
...
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Views: 63295 Submitted: 11/13/2012
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[ 99 comments ]
> hey anon, wanna give your opinion?
asd
User avatar #33 - JohnTheRipper
Reply +112 123456789123345869
(11/14/2012) [-]
I do **** like this for my friend all the time. I've been told I look to be "an imtimidating ************". I lift and stuff but just to keep it up from HS track and field. Anyway. My most recent scare was for my friend Willow. She had been asked to homecoming by some fellow at her new school. She called me to go over and be her "big brother". I took my shotgun and a single blank. He rang the door bell and I open the door as intense as I can "WHO THE **** ARE YOU!? WILLOW! IS THIS YOUR DATE?!". Im holding the shotgun at this point. I back him out into the yard and fire the shot into the air. I thought the boy was about to **** himself because he was on the ground screaming. I just aim at him and scream "YOURE GONNA TREAT HER RIGHT AND HAVE HER BACK BY 12! RIGHT?!?!" he screams yes. I lower the gun. Speaking in my softest voice "well alright *cock shotgun* we're done here *offer hand to help him up*". He uncurls and is just staring at me with tears in his eyes and grabs my hand. I help him up. Straighten his tie. Wipe his tears with shop towel in my back pocket. give him a slap on the back and he just walks in. Willow and her mom are both laughing their asses off.
#105 to #33 - EdwardNigma
Reply -2 123456789123345869
(11/14/2012) [-]
Your name + that story = I love you.
User avatar #115 to #105 - JohnTheRipper
Reply -2 123456789123345869
(11/14/2012) [-]
edward. *******. nigma. I watched batman forever 2 days ago. ******* love it.
#77 to #33 - bigblamo
Reply -1 123456789123345869
(11/14/2012) [-]
Haha. anymore stories? pls
User avatar #116 to #77 - JohnTheRipper
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(11/14/2012) [-]
I've got a few. wanna hear another?
#69 to #33 - xtremedeath
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(11/14/2012) [-]
#87 to #33 - bonkboy
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(11/14/2012) [-]
That was glorious, thank you for this midnight laugh.
User avatar #117 to #87 - JohnTheRipper
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(11/14/2012) [-]
i aim to please.
#45 to #33 - ortoropox
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(11/14/2012) [-]
#49 to #45 - JohnTheRipper
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(11/14/2012) [-]
i try my best.
i try my best.
User avatar #63 to #33 - candlejackismyhomi
Reply +9 123456789123345869
(11/14/2012) [-]
>"Well alright"
I read that in the most, hickish, deep south voice, as soft as possible, and lost it.

10/10.
User avatar #66 to #63 - JohnTheRipper
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(11/14/2012) [-]
haha i aim to please. i actually have a chicago accent.
User avatar #75 to #66 - creosote
Reply +4 123456789123345869
(11/14/2012) [-]
Don't spoil it...
User avatar #118 to #75 - JohnTheRipper
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(11/14/2012) [-]
to late. spoiled.
User avatar #39 to #33 - randybutternub
Reply +14 123456789123345869
(11/14/2012) [-]
Do u evn lift?
User avatar #43 to #39 - JohnTheRipper
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(11/14/2012) [-]
I know it was a joke :D
#42 to #39 - JohnTheRipper
0 123456789123345869
has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #41 to #39 - JohnTheRipper
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(11/14/2012) [-]
sometimes. mondays wednesdays and fridays. tuesday and thursday is cardio.
User avatar #53 to #41 - thepink
Reply +8 123456789123345869
(11/14/2012) [-]
That's new, I thought every day was upper body day...
User avatar #73 to #53 - PadreRasta
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(11/14/2012) [-]
I laughed so hard at this i couldn't even hit the green thumb.
#34 to #33 - jimmynutz
Reply +44 123456789123345869
(11/14/2012) [-]
after you fire that blank
User avatar #35 to #34 - JohnTheRipper
Reply +32 123456789123345869
(11/14/2012) [-]
for that split second I bet his asshole got so tight you coulda put a log up his ass and it would been cut in half.
User avatar #44 to #34 - RacistLlama
Reply -1 123456789123345869
(11/14/2012) [-]
In Az you can fire blanks in residential areas
User avatar #51 to #44 - JohnTheRipper
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(11/14/2012) [-]
I wasnt sure about the law in Iowa but Willow lives on a farm so it was alright.
User avatar #54 to #51 - RacistLlama
Reply -1 123456789123345869
(11/14/2012) [-]
Yeah then I assume it was all good lol
#40 to #33 - alucord
Reply +129 123456789123345869
(11/14/2012) [-]
>Be shy and lonley
>Get crush for homecoming
>go to her house
>Some big ass mother fucekr opens the door
>He has a shot gun
>**** **** ****
>He fires a gun
>Full Beta mode, on the ground screaming and crying
>see my crush in the door way laughing at me
>Feels Bad Man
User avatar #56 to #40 - tepeniam
Reply +24 123456789123345869
(11/14/2012) [-]
*Feels beta man
#97 to #40 - kaboomz
Reply +3 123456789123345869
(11/14/2012) [-]
This image has expired
>He has a shot gun
>He fires a gun

wich gun? the shotgun?
#82 to #40 - evantheboss
Reply +3 123456789123345869
(11/14/2012) [-]
ok lol, I laughed harder at this than the actual story lmfao. That was so funny
#16 - haxorman
Reply +84 123456789123345869
(11/14/2012) [-]
#38 to #16 - garentei
Reply +20 123456789123345869
(11/14/2012) [-]
#46 to #38 - haxorman
Reply +22 123456789123345869
(11/14/2012) [-]
#50 to #46 - garentei
Reply +23 123456789123345869
(11/14/2012) [-]
#64 to #50 - whathappenslive
Reply +9 123456789123345869
(11/14/2012) [-]
Comment Picture
User avatar #79 to #50 - HomerSimpson
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(11/14/2012) [-]
What are these from?
User avatar #80 to #79 - theo is awsome
Reply +7 123456789123345869
(11/14/2012) [-]
Tourettes Guy
User avatar #1 - Nightinear **User deleted account**
Reply +82 123456789123345869
(11/13/2012) [-]
What the hell
I would've hit him and thrown him out
User avatar #31 to #1 - thesnarfalarker
Reply +71 123456789123345869
(11/14/2012) [-]
but he even lifts
User avatar #11 to #1 - awesomenessdefined
Reply +77 123456789123345869
(11/14/2012) [-]
As if you were a match for him.
#23 - unbentgodfather
Reply +43 123456789123345869
(11/14/2012) [-]
******* mom....
******* mom....
User avatar #55 to #23 - dengekisushi
Reply +6 123456789123345869
(11/14/2012) [-]
I took your comment the wrong way.
#28 to #23 - breakfastlunch
Reply +24 123456789123345869
(11/14/2012) [-]
MFW the Doctor flips me off
#24 - jalthelas
Reply +38 123456789123345869
(11/14/2012) [-]
**jalthelas rolled a random image posted in comment #1758849 at MLP Friendly Board **


WHERE ARE THE PAPER TOWELS!

They're over here dad, in this bag.

THROW 'EM OVER HERE!

*throws*

OUCH! ************ YOU HIT ME IN THE DICK!

YOU'RE LUCKY IT WASN'T HARD... I MEAN THIS THING, NOT MY DICK.
#29 to #24 - kruzer
Reply +9 123456789123345869
(11/14/2012) [-]
I dunno what you're talking about, but it made me laugh, so you can have a thumb.
Enjoy :D
User avatar #30 to #29 - captainwow
Reply +4 123456789123345869
(11/14/2012) [-]
YouTube...Tourette's Guy...funny stuff.
#48 to #30 - kruzer
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(11/14/2012) [-]
I might have to look him up. :)
#2 - AustenAnarchy
Reply +34 123456789123345869
(11/13/2012) [-]
My brother would have gotten a beatdown.
#68 - cudakd
Reply +32 123456789123345869
(11/14/2012) [-]
Thought it was going to be an incest story
#81 to #68 - anon id: 76253281
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(11/14/2012) [-]
*************** yoda is a retard
#109 to #68 - nitupsar
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(11/14/2012) [-]
**nitupsar rolled a random image posted in comment #125 at Summary of FJ Lately **
**nitupsar rolled a random image posted in comment #125 at Summary of FJ Lately **
#32 - skinless
Reply +30 123456789123345869
(11/14/2012) [-]
Comment Picture
#78 - Adrien
Reply +27 123456789123345869
(11/14/2012) [-]
Her face when.
User avatar #83 to #78 - kolombiano [OP]
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(11/14/2012) [-]
You sir made me "lol"
#94 to #83 - paesani
Reply +4 123456789123345869
(11/14/2012) [-]
"I'm gonna tell them I lol'd so they all know."
User avatar #7 - iamthethree
Reply -57 123456789123345869
(11/14/2012) [-]
My older brothers first date was pretty funny
>Be 8
>brother is 15
>im a annoying ************
>they go down stairs to watch a **** movie
>me being a little douche i go down stairs to watch
>**** off anon
>i dont and go tell mom
>mom "OLDER ANON DONT BULLY YOUR BROTHER TREAT HIM WITH RESPECT
> i walk in the room and eye them down the whole time
>half way threw dumb bitch tells me to beat it
>not in my house
>i run away crying like a little bitch
>go tell mom
>"OLDER ANON GET THAT BITCH OUT OF MY HOUSE IF SHE IS GOING TO TREAT LITTLE ANON SO BAD"
>massive argument happens between my mom and brother
>girl leaves with brother
>i write a note on his computer
>"this is my house bitch"
#8 to #7 - sharkattacknow
0 123456789123345869
has deleted their comment [-]
#22 to #7 - anon id: f7aca590
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(11/14/2012) [-]
funny, but i would slap you so hard about 500 times until you passed out, if i was your brother.
#93 to #7 - bakawaka
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(11/14/2012) [-]
#37 to #7 - chiefrunnyjeans
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(11/14/2012) [-]
You're a ******
#98 to #7 - kyfvini
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(11/14/2012) [-]
god this is terrible
#10 to #7 - joocles
Reply +4 123456789123345869
(11/14/2012) [-]
**** u cunt
User avatar #26 to #7 - ManInKilt
Reply +5 123456789123345869
(11/14/2012) [-]
yup and your just as annoying now...
#27 to #7 - ohemgeezus
Reply +7 123456789123345869
(11/14/2012) [-]
cool story, also you don't have to use anon. No one is gonna track down where you live via two first names
#20 to #7 - CrazyPsycho
Reply +11 123456789123345869
(11/14/2012) [-]
**CrazyPsycho rolled a random image posted in comment #70 at seems legit ** makes me glad i don't have little ********* brothers
#15 to #7 - buthow
Reply +21 123456789123345869
(11/14/2012) [-]
I gave a thumb for effort.
#12 to #7 - adunsaveme
Reply +24 123456789123345869
(11/14/2012) [-]
#14 to #7 - trollacaust
Reply +25 123456789123345869
(11/14/2012) [-]
I would of beat the **** out of you for that if i was your older brother, gif related
I would of beat the **** out of you for that if i was your older brother, gif related