Presidents

Fuck you, europe. I'm an american, where I love freedom and hate queers. In america everyone has a job and the metric system doesn't make sense. There's sweet gherkins in every pickle jar and our politicians are honest. There's always enough hot dogs for our buns and equal amounts of chips for our dip. We dont have cockney accents and every starburst is red, and there are no yellows. We watch football and eat nachos on Sunday and work on the sabbath.

Hold on, I'm getting a phone call from the president, we're going to go jet packing to our space station deployer and go to mars and do space-mars stuff like drink space beer and watch space porn.

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#112 to #83 - europe (10/28/2012) [-]

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#108 to #83 - N. Korean citizen (10/28/2012) [-]

first let me clear that i am born in america and have been raised in america my whole life. now that we got that out of the way, let me tell you how you are patriotically incorrect. in america not everyone has jobs b/c all the mexicans keep stealing them leaving most americans in welfare and under the effects of a 16 trillion dollar dept. our politicians arnt honest, they lie 10 to 20 times on average in 1 sentence. buns for hot dogs are for pussies who dont want to get their hands dirty or dont know how to use a fork. I dont watch football b/c i see it as a bunch of macho guys in tights tackling one another and i aint gonna eat nachos to that. and i never have enough chips for my dip and vise versa. there are not just red starbursts, i find more pink starbursts. and we do have accents, without a accent the only language you can speak is sign language b/c the only thing you can do is heavy breathing nor is english the national language in america anymore due to all the illegal immigrants and us allowing them to enter even though we build a wall with half assed patrols at that boarder

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#109 to #108 - seniorawesomesauce (10/28/2012) [-]

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#90 to #83 - shutupanddie **User deleted account** (10/28/2012) [-]

Seems Legit

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#89 to #83 - kokainum **User deleted account** (10/28/2012) [-]

Didn't our president cut funds from NASA?

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#64 - slossboss (10/28/2012) [-]

top hats

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#80 - deltabtu **User deleted account** (10/28/2012) [+] (2 replies)

**deltabtu rolled a random image posted in comment #175070 at Video Games Board ** next president

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#111 to #80 - ponchosdm (10/28/2012) [-]

saw this pic, and COMIC SAAAAANS!! came to my mind

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#56 - michiisgay (10/28/2012) [+] (6 replies)

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#62 to #56 - romdadon (10/28/2012) [-]

what was this movie called

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#65 to #62 - georgewaters (10/28/2012) [-]

Abraham Lincoln: Vampire hunter

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#79 to #65 - takedatsociety (10/28/2012) [-]

Read the book, it was way better.

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#81 to #79 - deltabtu **User deleted account** (10/28/2012) [-]

both the book and the movie sucked

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#84 to #81 - takedatsociety (10/28/2012) [-]

I disagree. The book was surprisingly tasteful, especially considering what passes as a vampire novel these days. I enjoy mythological monsters and Lincoln was a badass. I was skeptical, but it is one of my favorites. Although the end was a bit bleh. Once you get past the who Abraham Lincoln is was a vampire hunter how tack, it was a good book. The movie was a great action movie,the fight scenes were great. Although, it's your opinion, and, obviously, not everyone can feel the same way.

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#85 to #84 - deltabtu **User deleted account** (10/28/2012) [-]

look man, i dont want any trouble

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#57 - hybredmoon (10/28/2012) [-]

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#29 - kibbleis (10/27/2012) [+] (6 replies)

HIGH HO. DO YOU KNOW. THE NAMES OF THE U.S. RESIDENTS WHO THEN BECAME THE PRESIDENTS AND GOT A VIEW FROM THE WHITE HOUSE LOU ON PENNSYLVANIA AVENUE?

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#32 to #29 - kibbleis (10/27/2012) [-]

George Washington was the first you see, he once chopped down a cherry tree. President number two would be John Adams and then number 3; Tom Jefferson stayed up to write a declaration late at night, so he and his wife had a great big fight and she made him sleep on the couch all night. James Madison never had a son when he fought the war of 1812. James Monroe's colossal nose was bigger than Pinocchio's. John Quincy Adams was number six, and it's Andrew Jackson's butt he kicks, so Jackson learns to play politics next time he's the one that the country picks.

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#37 to #32 - kibbleis (10/27/2012) [-]

Martin Vanburen, number eight, for a one term shot as chief of state. William Harrison, how do you praise, that guy was dead in thirty days! John Tyler he liked country folk, and after him came president Polk. Zachery Taylor liked to smoke, his breath killed friends whenever he spoke. 1850, really nifty, Milliard Fillmore's in. Young and Fierce came Franklin Pierce the man without a chin. Follows next a period spanning, four long years with James Buchanan, then the south starts shooting cannon, and we've got a civil war. A war, a war down south in Dixey! Up to bat comes old Abe Lincoln, there's a guy whose really thinking. Kept the united states from shrinking, and saved the ship of state from sinking. Andrew Johnson's next, he had some slight defects. Congress each would impeach and so the country now elects, Ulysses Simpson Grant, who would scream and rave and rant whlie drinking whiskey, although risky, cause he would spill it on his pants!

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#47 to #37 - galkawhm (10/27/2012) [-]

Please tell me that's from Animaniacs.

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#68 to #47 - kibbleis (10/28/2012) [-]

yup

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#69 to #68 - galkawhm (10/28/2012) [-]

I love you.

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#40 to #37 - kibbleis (10/27/2012) [-]

Taking too long, someone else finish this.

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#4 - resolo (10/27/2012) [+] (2 replies)

One problem there are 43 american presidents because one was elected 2 times just saying

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#39 to #4 - silasdg (10/27/2012) [-]

Yes so? That isn't a problem you still have a picture of them for that term just like you would still write their name in as that position.

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#21 to #4 - IAmManbearpig (10/27/2012) [-]

elected 2 separate terms counts as a different president

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#88 - choasmage (10/28/2012) [+] (2 replies)

I think Bill Clinton should have a giant erection at least.

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#105 to #88 - fourtwentt (10/28/2012) [-]

im just waiting for this...

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#91 to #88 - ihatem (10/28/2012) [-]

Pretty sure he does

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#86 - wrappedmind **User deleted account** (10/28/2012) [-]

**wrappedmind rolled a random image posted in comment #1 at Handguns ** The next president

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#9 - agentmoleman (10/27/2012) [-]

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#92 - magict (10/28/2012) [-]

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#59 - danielscqro (10/28/2012) [-]

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#25 - snaresinger (10/27/2012) [-]

I feel like this is incomplete for not doing something special to honor Teddy Roosevelt, or as I like to call him, American Saxton Hale

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Presidents

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