Patrick Star 2012

In these dark times, America doesn't need a president. It needs a cactus.
Cactus has demonstrated fiscal responsibility more than any other canidate. Cactus has consistently reduced the water potential gradient. While Washington wasted out tax dollars, Cactus has cut down on water loss through transpiration. Cactus' strong anti-herbivore stance is what our economy needs to get back on track.

Short growing season. Long Dormancy. Cactus 2012.

Given my knowledge of the current political and economical situation in the United States (I do not live there), Patrick Star would likely make a better president.