Facebook Status Compilation (READ DESC.). Hi! So, why am I reposting this? Well, I'm the guy who wrote all of those. I pretty much use Facebook solely for stuff
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Facebook Status Compilation (READ DESC.)

Hi! So, why am I reposting this?
Well, I'm the guy who wrote all of those. I pretty much use Facebook solely for stuff like this. The stuff I write isn't polished or meant to be professional by any stretch of the imagination, but some people seem to enjoy it.
Anyways, I looked through the comments of the original FJ post my friend made (once my friends started posting this around, I couldn't help but read what people thought), and you guys were all really cool and supportive. Which w...more »

Hi! So, why am I reposting this?
Well, I'm the guy who wrote all of those. I pretty much use Facebook solely for stuff like this. The stuff I write isn't polished or meant to be professional by any stretch of the imagination, but some people seem to enjoy it.
Anyways, I looked through the comments of the original FJ post my friend made (once my friends started posting this around, I couldn't help but read what people thought), and you guys were all really cool and supportive. Which was nice, because when my other friend put this on Reddit, the guys over there wrote that I should give up and stop trying because I wasn't funny, suggested it was stolen, etc. Reading what you guys wrote made me feel a lot better.
Point is, I feel like I owe you something. If there's any interest, I can post my Twitter/Facebook feeds so you guys can get more stuff like this right from the source, but this is really about thanking you guys for laughing at my stuff at a time when I really needed it. So thanks, guys. Really. Thank you.

Also, since you'll want proof that this is legit, here are the links to the original posts on FJ and Reddit.
FJ: www.funnyjunk.com/funny_pictures/2600730/Facebook/
Reddit: You need to login to view this link

You can PM either of those dudes, and they'll tell you I'm the "friend" they're both referencing. Let me know if I can do anything else as far as proof goes. Oh, and the title for the Reddit post is heavily exaggerated. Maybe 5% of the people at my school knew my name at the time he wrote that, and he made it sound like I'm some kinda hero...guh.

TL;DR I ******* love you guys.

So I' m starting a gang. Bur gang sign is a crudely drawn penis. And I don' t mean
to brag, but we' tagged every damn public bathroom, park bench, and middle
school Iterating desk from here to New York City. So we' re kind ofa big deal.
Your move, Bloods anyfur Dips.
Unlike , Comment 'Monday at 21: 33 it
You, I 9; G. aksaray. a Pre.. an in In J! nu mg and 29 others like
this,
Q View all 25 comments
l 'rean. ' mirier: eever
Tuesday at 13: 44 . Like . , 1 person
1 ml draong sign?
Tuesday at 16: 24 . Like
Write a comment...
As we drove up to Los Angeles this morning, I found myself thinking, How long
would one have to drive in the carpool lane wilt: a prostitute in the passenger seat
in order for the savings in gas and time to negate the cost ofthe ****** ?" Well, I
thoughti I suppose that would depend on the cost ofthe ****** , the MPG ofthe
an and how valuable one considers time to be,
And then I stopped thinking, because **** math,
Unlike I Comment ' 23 August at 22: 33 it
So today, I learned how to sail, After going back and form for like and hour in the
bay, it' s safe to say I' m an expert. So, the question is, ladies, will you let me lake
you on a sailboat and you could strand up on the bow and spread your arms out
and I' d come up behind you but it wouldn' t be creepy and at some point I' d be like
I' M THE KING OF THE RORLD" and then later I could draw you ***** or
whatever.
So, yeah, all me,
Unlike ' Comment ' 35 August at 12: 44 - 1:
As a rapper, the highest honor you an achieve is having your dumbass fans
actually spell your name correctly in the Youtube suggestions menu.
Like I Comment ' 16 July at 12: 36 , 1:
In H 1 and 6 others like this,
Write a comment,,,
I' m not so sure I believe that George himself grew ********* . I feel
like if he did, the would be very, very different.
we the People of the United Slates, in Carder to form a more perfect Union,
Eggs
Wine
More Weed
Some of those little ******* rakes that Madison' s wife makes
More weed
Apples
Roasted chicken, but like, cut it up into little bite size nuggets.
Like ' Comment , 137 July at 21: 33 ' t,
I never know what to say to people when I pass them on the sidewalk at night.
Good evening" is creepy as hell, and "good night" literally sounds like you' re about
to kill the person. Seriously, good night is only ever appropriate when you' re either
a) Actually going to sleep or b) Whispering it in the ear of your victim,
And mats why Jack the Ripper killed everyone he met on the road at night.
Like Comment '02 July at 22: 43 u,
SCI
Surprisingly, Biting advice of "grabbing someone sexy" and telling her to
give you everything tonight‘ or she ‘might not see tomorrow‘ isn' t quite as
effective as one might think.
Like . Comment . 15 May at 13: 52 I t,
Surprisingly, my APUSH teacher was not amused when I asked if Flacon' s Rebellion
was the aftermath ofthe invasion ofthe Bay of Pigs the day before the AP test.
is In
As fiar as Greer opinons go, I' m torn between becoming an injections drug dealer or
a pimp who specializes in prostitutes that dress up like superheroes.
That' s right. I' m going to be either a ****** dealer, or a ******* dealer.
Like ' Comment , 22 April at 13: 57 , t,
This poll mats asking ‘Whats most important in a relationship?" actually produces
Mme important data, Girls, you an now tell which guys like sex, and whim guys
are ******* liars.
Unlike , Comment I 33 April at 23: 27 ' t,
My basketball strategy consists of making velosirraptor sounds, flailing my arms,
and wearing a bicycle helmet while screaming that everything is a foul.
Like , Comment -33 April at -
This MTV ‘Get " compition is heavy stuff. I better get myself tested
for STEM Beceuse of all the sex I have, Frequently, Aith all ofthe girls that want
to have sex with me, Beacuse they know thatl am good at sex.
I am sexually active,
Math is a **** .
Thank you.
Like . Comment '03 February at 16: 32 . t,
I actually enjoy political arguments. Especially when I' m defending Barack Obama,
because it requires very little effort on my part. All I really have to do is launch a
personal aback on my opponent, including the words ‘racist‘, "ignorant', and
America", I win, you ignorant racist. America,
Like I Comment I 26 January at 13: 35 I t,
My self esteem is at an all time low. There' s this girl who just HATES me, She keeps
calling me pathetic, creepy, even a MONSTER.
Whatever. Still not letting her out of my basement.
Like I Comment , 30 December 2313 at 23: 46 u,
YES, THIS IS A REPOST, But I can explain. Read the description,
...
+47
Views: 3163
Favorited: 4
Submitted: 08/10/2012
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#4 - banii (08/11/2012) [-]
I love your witty posts. :3
#3 - wytewrapper (08/11/2012) [-]
If its really you, you are 						*******					 hilarious!
If its really you, you are ******* hilarious!
#2 - anonymous (08/11/2012) [-]
I thought this was hilarious! There are plenty of people that like it, so keep posting.
User avatar #1 - crankshaftbyshawty (08/10/2012) [-]
reddit is right..it's not really funny..i think you repost it just to claim credit or something
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