Vikings

6. Dance

7. repeat until one reaches Valhalla trough glorious battle

8. Call J.G. Wentworth.

9. Stop any form of threading that leads to believe there's more than 4 steps in the Viking Business Schedule.
Which technically makes this a paradox.
but whatever i'm a fuvking viking eat my dick

10. drink some FUCKIN' TEA!

nigger

Will I get double miles on every purchase?

They're Visigoths.

In Soviet Russia, Capital One opens you!

one job... you had one job!

Two jobs.

Shit Sven, get yo shit together nigga.

I think viking is a pretty cool guy
eh kills pillagers and doesn't afraid of anything

Truth be told, Yes you are right. It have been confirmed that other people from Scandinavia also invaded England I do apologize.

At the time where the east coat of England was invaded the vikings was under the danish crown, as one nation. :) (Denmark, Norway and Sweden)

And faroe Islands

and the Faroe Islands. :)

Norway was a part of denmark untill the napoleon wars, to be under the "danish crown" just means that denmark as a kingdom ruled over people, norway, german(the danish border went all the way to hamburg) iceland and southern sweden

that is because Denmark was the "ruler of the world" at the time of the vikings, no one dares to stand against them

most feared army at the time, yes. the Dansih army was still feared up untill the battle in 1864 where the Danes got steam rolled by the germans. why you may ask.. bad government and the Germans had a weapon superiority (Back-loader rifles, instead of the old front loader)

"defeat" no, they simply won back some land, they walked over the ice between sweden and denmark and caught the danes by surprice

1) The vikings invaded England, they didn't arrive looking for peace

2) Those people didn't write the Bible like you imply, the Bible was written hundreds of years previous, the Catholics just twisted the Bible to brainwash people, which is not it's proper or intentional use

1) Who said that they invaded? Understand the message.

2) "Can we trust the people that wrote the bible?" Maybe it was a bit too much for you that I implied that christian monks/priest wrote the bible as it was written many years ago. The old testament was the original bible, but people kept adding new things to it. Even though the stuff were new they were still in the bible and i'm quite sure it was Priests and such that made the old testament and the new parts for it. And i'm quite sure its full of shit, therefore Priest and monks of the christian sort are not to be trusted about what they write down.

3) It's a joke.

1) It's accepted fact they were the aggressors when entering the British Isles, Harold Godwin had to fight them off during a two-front war during his reign, the other front being the French invading and eventually taking over London whilst the Vikings targeted the mid/north-east coast

2) Catholic monks/priests had nothing to do with the writing up of the old or new testaments. Moses and other followers of Jehovah wrote up the old testament, whereas the new testament was written up mostly by Jesus' disciples as most of the new testament is about Jesus' life and teachings

3) Most of the stuff in the Bible isn't shit at all, even though parts of it may seem far-fetched, they're mainly there to give us life lessons and teach us how to love and have peace with one another.

3) I saw it as your own opinion and took offence to your ignorance. Meh, my bad I guess

I still don't trust Catholics though, they contradict many of the Bible's teachings and even some of the ten commandments in the way they choose to organise and practice their branch of Christianity. It's disgusting to see how people choose to follow Catholicism when the scriptures are right there in front of them telling them what they're doing is wrong...

I think we have gone a bit of track here.

History teaches us that "Harold Godwin had to fight them off during a ~" But who wrote it down? History is written by the winner. If the crusaders under the holy crusades had won all of the middle east. Then they would sing on how they smited the unholy infidels. And they have been known to write down some non-logical tales. (Not referring to the bible.)

There have been proof that the vikings were actually cleaner then the average "English men" at that time. And that the vikings had technologically better weaponry. Does this discribe a man who would run around raping and killing people?

This is just a theory i have, but i find it much more logical that the vikings have been doing trading with England for quite some time. And many were tired of Denmark. So they set sail to England in hope of a better future.

They arrived, they were heathens, church was butthurt and preached about they were devil worshipers. Saying they should be killed. The vikings were hunted and they didn't want to go back to Denmark. Long way home/ possibly no food. The vikings started to fight back. England (or the many English factions.) had war with them. They were too many for the vikings to take over whole England. They settled down different places. Created the York.

I didn't create this topic to discuss who was better to either search on Wikipedia or actually remember stuff from the bible. Of cause I respect people of religious intentions, but I don't focus on what was written down, I focus on facts. And when it comes to history the Catholics have been... Not truthful or psychotically religiously delightful.

I guess we can always agree that Catholics suck. My point is just that history even if truthful or not. Always need to be taken with a hint of Facts/Logic.

The Vikings defeated Harold Godwin, I don't know who wrote it down, several people I guess in different accounts? Combine them and we have enough evidence to call it fact?

Both Vikings and English men were dirty, hygiene wasn't exactly good back then, either way that doesn't mean they didn't rape and kill people. When** ANY** civilisation attacks and invades another they intend to kill people that stand in their way, and most likely they would take advantage of the women there, whether the attackers were Vikings or Englishmen, it's the same story

So you actually believe the Vikings were there peacefully? I thought that was the part you said you were joking about...

Education was lacking in that time. Only priests, monks, noblemen and scribes could read and write. Maybe the vikings could read and write as well in their own language, but there haven't been found any rune tablets or scrolls of the Nordic kind.

Muslims take a bath each day. They may not have soap or other hygiene products back in the Viking-age so they were doubtfully cleaner then us, but they are still "cleaner" then most people in that age. The Danes didn't exactly go to bath everyday. They bathed every Sunday.

Yes, you may be right, the vikings had slaves called "træl." It's very likely that they took women and kids and made them their slaves, but were they as barbaric as the church of England described them to be? What if the church made the first hostile action?

I do not imply that they were peaceful. However I do have facts that proves that they may not be as barbaric as they may seem. (Hygiene, technological advancement.) I found this quite funny, and I set it up as a joke/theory, mostly for the fun part though.

This thread is beautiful.

Don't feel too bad. Your women are hot

Can't agree more. Scarfs, man-purses, pink polo piques everywhere.

Meh. I'm thinking more about these kinds

And our women;

While we let muzzie rats like THESE invade our beautiful lands.

Kill it. Kill it with fire.

And these.

When I look upon my modern countrymen, I feel nearly nothing but shame. We have lost all of our morals, our honor, dignity, and shame. I think that refers to most of the Western World though, and not only Norway and Scandinavia.
I wish we could look a bit more like THIS again
<<<

Broder Danmark, la oss dra ut på vikingtokt igjen. La oss reise til usa og lærer dem æ,ø og å EN GANG FOR ALLE!

VALHALL!

De får den lige i nummi

fish nordic viking fish fish cold

pillage slaughter rape murder slaughter

Jeg gik til google oversætter. skal jeg passe på nu?

**klavs rolls 52** Hvis det er dubs, så ja.

**isexcats rolls 711**
Knulle deg Dubs im rullende turer

**klavs rolls 87**

Im gjetter min norske er completyely Gud forferdelig, hovedsakelig fordi jeg dont snakker et verk av det. InFact denne sentance er trolig kommer til å gjøre Ero fornuft og ha noe jævla hunder i det

Yea.. My turn for google translate.

What do you think about Google's way to translate from Danish to English?

It translates quite well, it has better English than most Americans

Sad, but true.

I honestly hate my country most of the people are fat or retarded

Også im undskyld for mit dårlige dansk google cant oversætte for lort

forever alone Sweden.

So, were the planes flying into the buildings a desperate attempt by the Taliban to destroy the Viking raiders that were pillaging the WTC?

Except in viking religion, a wolf eats the world, kills all the gods, and everything ends forever.

Its a Dragon i thought

Various creatures kill the gods, including Fenrir the wolf, the World Serpent, etc.

Right! Forgot that the Fenir was the one who kills Odin

2000 thousand years of darkness, then an eternity of peace and light

what religion are you reading?

That's what I learned about Norse Paganism. The world is in a terrible state for a long period, then everything is destroyed and the world begins anew

I Believe that that dark period was about 900 ad or something like that.

I might also mention that even the vikings thought christianity was better

*shrug*

I personally find the Viking religion more interesting

you belive what you want, but i'd just like to point out, that there aren't many temples to Odin left around anymore.

Endless party, bro!

poor Iceland, nobody ever seems to care about them.

Well, they are practically Norwegian, or rather, how Norwegians should have been.

well it says "Success breeds Jealousy"...

And everyone know that Island is not a rich country

Dette må være 17. gang jeg ser deg :P

ITS GOOD FOR YOU

satwcomic.com/for-realz

Just saiyan.

isnt that from that gore-bread post?

Vi er sønner og døttre av vikinger, vi er nordmenn!

thats fucking right we are

mfw i'm playing skyrim in full plate steel armor right now
mfw i have no face

hei du.

Hei =)!