A bunch of idiots crashed on a motherfucking toxic planet, but you and your stupid ass decide to go there.. fo' fun. You have to beat beetles and collect keys to save a people of human sized moths. When this be done, you beat the crap out of a junkie and get back to the base.
Oh also, you're a blonde with 2 fucking meter wide shoulders.

Metroid Prime Echoes

you start as a fucking 10 year old kid or some shit and your island breaks and you fuckin go around with Disney characters killing ants with your magic key-Kingdom Hearts

you start out life as a nonhuman that everyone hates, then have to go three days in the same city doing absolutely nothing because nonhumans cant do shit. after three days, you go back in time and relive the same three days over and over again until you complete a bunch of shitty challenges-----Majora's Mask

Buy your own weapons when you're sent out by your own country to kill terrorists. - Counter-Strike, CS:S, CS:CZ & CS:GO.

You're running late for work like the lazy fuck you are, and when you arrive, you have to put on this tight fucking suit that makes you look like a damn robot. Then a bunch of fucking bald nerds shove you into this chamber without having your permission. They then force you to push this damn cart into a bunch of lasers and shit (bad idea, nerds) so they don't have to. A bunch of shit gets blown up, and now random aliens and shit are appearing outta nowhere. You grab a crowbar and start pointlessly beating the shit out of everything, and those jackass scientists teleport you to this wack-ass planet. You mozy your lazy ass through it, and just shoot the hell out of this giant big-headed thing until it explodes with fireworks. Then this creepy motherfucker with a suit appears and hires your ass to do shitty work for "humanity."

-Half-Life

Mirror's Edge: Move from A to B.
Gta San Andreas: Kill shit.
WoW: Talk. Kill. Repeat.

Graphics are shitty, the NPC's are ugly, the plot is lame, you get no respawns, everything fucking tries to kill you. O yea, you can't win either. -life

You start out broke, alone, and in a (almost) deserted bar. Through out the story you learn that people are just bastards. Hitl... I mean Mengsk goes around jailing anyone who doesn't see the world his way.

At the same time your depressed self (Jim Raynor) mopes around about a girl who got turned into Bitchy bitch hellspawn McBitch bent on galaxy domination through the power of undead looking creatures. On top of that while moping around, and trying to free the jailed citizens you also have to face the wrath of Protoss (super advanced alien race) if you don't destroy what they tell you to.

At the very end you have to kill your best friend who you've known since boot camp. Because he was set to be killed if he could not kill Bitchy bitch hellspawn McBitch.


I know I could probably do better, but I'm satisfied with this.

You have to press these fucking buttons when they pop up on the screen and click another button at the same time. It's so fucking simple and lame. That's it. You also pretend like you're playing songs when actually, you look like a fucking moron pressing buttons on a fake ass guitar.

-Guitar Hero

run around killing snails and mushrooms, a lot of hackers and spammers, and the game is in 2D. -Maple Story

you just described the game, that game is so shitty there is no way to describe it worse than it is.

You start out as a bratty punk that breaks shit and kills things. You then put your thieving hands over an ancient artifact because a bratty little bitch was stolen by a pedophile and you want to save her. You then get pushed forward in time because you grabbed the sword, and you still act like a thug, breaking pots and shit.

You skip all the cutscenes...

Mass Effect 3
nuff said

You go around and build stuff. -Minecraft

Deus Ex Human Revolution. You have to go around and sneak into others pc to find out who wanted your chick

It's this game where you have to like escape from a jail, but it's like from the future and stuff.

You use this gun you steal from devices that allows you to teleport. After you fight the final boss you escape from it.

That's pretty much Portal dude, what about you?

Call of Duty: Multiplayer

The Legend of Zelda: The Wind Waker. Where do I start? You start off as some annoying freaking kid on an island filled with a bunch of annoying characters. After 30 minutes of boring introductions and instructions you finally get to advance the plot, just to get thrown onto a pirate ship where your whole goal is to jump around after a while. The first 5th of the game you go around with no sword, and you are forced to sneak around without being able to fight. And FINALLY, after all that, you get to start your adventure, right? WRONG! You end up spending hours sailing ALL OVER THE FREAKING OCEAN FOR NO REASON.

Assassin's Creed is the game where you have to be stealthy and shit but the fucking developer make it impossible to do that cause the only stealthy fucking thing in this game is hiding.

You get this stories where Assassin's and Templars fight and shit but there's involvement of fucking god that useless and pointless that you could killed your own girlfriend eventough she already agreed to have sex with you in the third game!

The fucking first game has one protagonist that otaku called "Kuudere", he's cold blooded killer who do parkour and most fucking amazing thing with human body, but he can't fucking swim!

Call of duty 4. See, it may have been the greatest game in the franchise, but that's just because it had such stifling choices. Only 3 killstreaks, barely any perks that had any super huge effects. It actually required you to be good at firefights. God knows no FPS should ever try to impose that on its players. It's a damn shame... I guess game developers just didn't know what they were doing... Good thing we have newer versions where you can send little car mines and dogs to kill people for you :D