around the southwestern part of the US. theirs actually a new bread of spider called the brown widow, some how the two fuckers had sex and made this little bastard, which is more deadly then both of them, had a full nest of them on the outside of my house a couple months ago...

And you didn't took the nest and sold the spiders to many corporations for massive ammounts of money?

so you would be willing to attempt to l capture living versions of the deadliest spider within a 100 mile radius of you? i dont exactly have money to spend on equipment to do that successfully, i'd rather not die.

Well. If you´d have enough for a neurotoxin, you could test it on other spiders. To see if they get paralysed. Whenever you know it´s ready, spray the shit while having a gasmask.
Paralyse the little bitches and then when it´s ready, break open the place they were. Extract them with special gloves that cannot be pierced by them, and Bang. You have your own rare breed spiderbro:P

so i need a couple hundred for the neurotoxin, the money to buy fresh samples of dangerous samples, the money to break open the side of my house, and the money to fix it again. along with a paralying agent to freeze the brown widows, and a hundred dollar good gas mask, then another 50 for the gloves. plus a couple hundred for the containment and control of said spider colony. totaling somewhere around a couple thousand dollars, just to find out there are more deadly spiders out there not three months later....

yea. im good, but thanks for the idea.

Look for gloves in your house, put them over each other, problem solved :P
Buy sleeping gas, and while using it. Go out of your house, no gas mask needed.
If you have a crowbar or something strong, break the place they are, and repair it after you cleansed the entire part. By the time that is done you sold the spiders to scientific companies and made enough to refund the damage done and some extra's for the house.
If you'd do that within three months then you broken the cycle of achieving evolution to get new sorts, and you can get the money

well im lazy soo.....

Hire a guy who does a private job. If he is a one mans company then it's fine.
Hire him, take him to the spider place. Let HIM do all the shit while you drive to Kfc to get a nice bucket. Go home, find the man dead and the spiders paralysed.
Quickly put the spiders in a special place they cannot escape, and go to the man his house to rob him and bury the body somewhere

not a fan of framed murdur either

Who says you ''knew'' about these spiders

then why would i have a guy just randomly bust up my wall?

then they question as to why i didnt get someone who works for the gas company to fix it

With the money you get from the spiders, no one has to know there was any sign of a gas leak or any other kind.
Whenever your plan succeeded, and you have the money. Just replace the bit of wall. Your reason? A drunk guy fucked it up, tried making molotov hell thats up to you to decide. For my part a piano got into it by accident xD

lol, a piano, idk... that might be able to work... but the fact that he died is going to get ALOT more attention then would be nice

It won't get ALOT of attention if the guy works on his own. He would have no one to contact or to make appointments with. The only guy should be his financial advisor, which he meets 1 or 2 times in the month. By that time you're done already.

touche... but of corse his good friend vinny is a drug lord, and now im fucked

But he and vinny always meet at the docks, near pier 34 remember. Whenever that ship full of cocaine arrives he meets with vinny. Now that you mention it. Send a text message with the guys phone to vinny. Tell him you need to do some serious shit, and that he will send a replacement to vinny. That would be you with a identity. Whenever Vinny asks, tell him you don't want your true identity to be seen, just incase. Go to vinny, and get your fuckload of extra money. Now you can burn your house accidently for insurance. And use all the money for a brand new house... Do know this ending will kill all the spiders, but you can controll them and .....oh wait... Fucking mass effect 3 ending again

MFW i realize this might work (never played mass effect)

(we've hit the reply maximum) and what? mass effect or vinny?

Stoner story xD

i am so happy i currently live in grand forks, north dakota. there is nothing that can kill me up here

my US geography is a bit rusty, is Mount Rushmoar in north or south dakota?

south dakota, im about 60 miles from canada.

oh, well there goes my idea of the rocks falling on you... have fun never ever getting hurt, ill just get eaten by sharks.

well i guess i could die in the cold. it got to -35 degrees Fahrenheit this year....

that is a possibility, so the elements are trying to kill you... have fun dealing with those

I've never been so happy to live in the southeast as I am now.....

the bottom corner where my wall meets the ground has a slight inside lip into the wall for some reason all around the house. the fuckers had webs all over the corner, i brushed up against it one time (thats how i found them) it scare the shit out of me, especially when it was night time and i had to find out what they were with a flash light. (and barefeet cause im a retard)

...Did you shit your pants? Cause I know I would do just that.

no, i kept my dignity that much, but i got insect killer the next day and used the hole can on them, i counted 6 or 7 adults and two egg sacks when they were all dead. needless to say im fucking glad i got them when i did.

You are a stronger person then I, though I would probably use fire...

I'd like to keep my house thank you. and the creepiest thing about them is that their brown with red hourglasses. that gave me constant shivers for at least an hour afterwards. it just not something you enjoy finding next to/in your house

No, leave the house, it's too late to save it now, it had those fuckers in it, there has to be more. But I used to live in the middle of the woods so we saw some really big spiders, including wolf spiders

wolf spiders and jumping spider personally scare the shit out of me, they move WAY to fast. (and dont worry, i triple checked and used another half can to be sure)

We used to have black widows all the time, and wolf spiders are fucking huge D; We moved away from the woods to a suburban area.

personally, i would like to rather live in the woods, if they wernt filled with creepy animals and serial killers

I loved the woods, but growing up in the middle of nowhere would have been boring, I think my parents made the right decision

I lived in NYC till i was about 8, then moved to a happy little community in Orange County California. been living here ever sense, i actually hate camping, but i enjoy nature.

I absolutely love nature as well, climbing on rocks, walking around under the tree canopy, I miss living there

rivers are my favorite, that and rock climbing, my two favorite things to do. altho i have yet to rock climb up the side of a waterfall

That would be so scary! I tried doing one of those rock climbing walls, nearly killed me XD

i get a bit creeped out near the top with the vertigo, but my goal is just to get up as fast as i can

No, this is.

then it must be a hobo spider(maybe) plus it is what young brown recluses look like, and yo OP their bites are painless, so if you see a mark go to your doctor immediately, because if he bit you, you wouldn't even know it.