Vodka is for children.

Traditional Capitalism: You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull. Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows. You sell them and retire on the income.
Italian Capitalism: You have two cows, but you don’t know where they are. You break for lunch.
britfat Capitalism: You have two cows. Both are mad.
Japanese Capitalism: You have two cows. You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk. You then create cow cartoon images called Cowkimon and market them world-wide.
German Capitalism: You have two cows. You re-engineer them so they live for 100 years, eat once a month, and milk themselves.
Arkansas Capitalism: You have two cows. That one on the left is kinda cute…
Swiss Capitalism: You have 5000 cows, none of which belong to you. You charge others for storing them.
Chinese Capitalism: You have two cows. You have 300 people milking them. You claim full employment, high bovine productivity, and arrest the newsman who reported the numbers.
Irish Capitalism: You have two cows. You feed them potatoes and wonder why they emigrate.
Israeli Capitalism: So, there are these two Jewish cows, right? They open a milk factory, an ice cream store, and then sell the movie rights. They send their calves to Harvard to become doctors. So, who needs people?
Cuban Capitalism: You have two cows. They try to swim to Florida.
Politically Correct Capitalism: You are associated with (the concept of “ownership” is a symbol of the phallocentric, war mongering, intolerant past) two differently – aged (but no less valuable to society) bovines of non-specified gender.
Disney Capitalism: You have two cows. They dance & sing.
Russian Capitalism: You have two cows. You count them and learn you have five cows. You count them again and learn you have 42 cows. You count them again and learn you have 12 cows. You stop counting cows and open another bottle of vodka.

Ah, yes... Alchohol, the answer and source of all of life's problems

**nassalaravek rolled a random image posted in comment #318 at Cat-ception ** Me when I can't log in on my Etch A Sketch

**dubsgotrealhard rolled a random image posted in comment #50 at best girlfriend EVER ** russians every morning with a hangover

Give this guy a medal for perfect spelling and grammar while drunk.

**blackappleuk rolled a random image posted in comment #210 at What would he look like? ** i know this feeling to well

how do i delete account? plz help.

**supervillain rolled a random image posted in comment #343 at Is this real life? ** Me after trying vodka for the first time.

**funnierthanadam rolled a random image posted in comment #98 at Who needs drawing anyway :( ** i like you

its just stolen from sickipedia. peopekl always steal from sickipedia if they cant make up a status. its the easier way to get likes ;/

**zombierepellant rolled a random image posted in comment #1 at peach slap **
<--- what he'll look like in the morning

**thedungeonmaster rolled a random image posted in comment #137 at True Story OC ** Me after a bottle of vodka

Sickipedia.

**hightime rolls 449**

I'm not sure whats THAT funny here...