If the horizon explodes, pull If your car has an erection
car over to the shoulder until for more than It hours, call
the fiery cloud of death has a licensed mechanic.
If live power lines are flailing If your radio begins emitting
about, don' t be a pussy, drive intense orange radiation, feel
under them really fast. free to warm your ears.
If a giant toxic spray can tries If it cannot be reasoned with,
to attack you, try reasoning walk away gingerly and bid it
with it a good day.
Always keep your mouth Missouri only has 3 hospitals.
WEE” when at Navy. Consider moving to another
Sailors with herpes shop there. state.
If your organs suddenly fly out % the elderly, set
of your body, try doing some their clocks and electronics to
biology homework or eating different times.
Be sure to wash all the When viewing modem art, resist
evidence off your hands the "THE to to
before calling the police. - LUBE away and chaise
Never eat random fish and Instead, use your powers of
birds you find lying about. telepathy to hurt them into a
vortex of doom.
Make sure no one is looking Giants should avoid hospitals
before you grow dead for regular sized people.
If the mot is caving in, don' t You know, you could just get
be a nerd and try to save your an iphone.
Do not point your genitals It radiation wants to come
directly at radiation- It only takes inside, don' t answer the door.
5 minutes before your nuts fall Hide Behind the couch like when
om Jehovah' s Witnesses come.
Please transfer any explosive or If Nickelback begins to play
materials into a 3 you should cud into a ball or
ounce container Beore getting run for your life.
on an airplane.
You fool! Don' t look out the Shelves and tiling cabinets are
window. It' s bright out there. Go just in it for the sex. You should
back to the intenet. seek a lasting relationship with
less whorish funiture.