Joke of the day Saturday. funnyjunk.com/funny_pictures/2425475/The+key+to+being+happy/ funnyjunk.com/funny_pictures/2425480/joke+of+the+day+sunday/. Joke of the
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Joke of the day Saturday

Joke of the day
So an old man walks into a sperm bank and he says to the
receptionist ''I' d like to make a deposite"
The receptionist asks "How old are you?"
The old man looks her in the eyes and says 'Tm 94 and if
you' re implying what I think you are i' ll have you know my wife
isn' t here because she' s still tired from the last time we made
love."
So the receptionist hands him the forms then after they are
filled out she hands him the jar and guides him to a room not
too far down the hall.
She says "We have magazines and other material to help if you
needet"
The man shrugged and said it wouldn' t be needed.
After he had closed the door and about 10 second went by then
sound came from the old mans room, sounds like he was
straining himself.
Yells, partially even sounding like he was having a heart attack.
The receptionist ran to the door knocked and said worriedly
Are you alright in there'?"
The old man replied ll
yes, but i can' t get the damn lid off of this jar."
...
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Views: 30714
Favorited: 33
Submitted: 07/30/2011
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Comments(51):

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Anonymous commenting is allowed
User avatar #50 - serterazi (11/11/2013) [-]
comment #42

actually it's the first time i see a tumbed up comment get flagged
User avatar #51 to #50 - badboywantsu (11/27/2013) [-]
i know it's sad too
#46 - gelantinus (07/31/2011) [-]
I'll just leave this here.
User avatar #45 - deathedblack (07/31/2011) [-]
*ALTERNATE ENDING*

The nurse heard the man struggling and knocks on the door- 'Sir, are you alright?'

The man replies, 'No, I just can't seem to get the damn thing off!'

So the nurse walk in and says, 'Here, let me help you ;)' and begins to work her hands on him.

After a few minutes she asks, 'Is this helping then?' and the man goes red.

'Yes' he replies, 'But I meant the lid for this jar...'
Comment has been flagged   Hide Hide All +Fav (5) Reply +22
#42 - anonymous (07/31/2011) [-]
This image was flagged 10/29/2013
User avatar #43 to #42 - badboywantsu (07/31/2011) [-]
if more anons were like you we wouldn't dislike them as much make an account.
User avatar #44 to #43 - megawatt (07/31/2011) [-]
>leave this hear
>this hear
>hear
#41 - theakwardturtle (07/31/2011) [-]
an man is about to donate sperm and the worker there told him to bring the jar home and he came back the next day with the jar but it is empty, the worker asks him why its empty, he said he tried with his left hand, nothing, right hand, nothing so he got his wife and she used her left hand, nothing, right hand, nothing, mouth, nothing, so he got his wifes friend to try with her left hand, nothing, right hand, nothing, mouth, nothing. the worker asks 'wait, your wifes friend?!' the man said 'yeah, and we still coudn't get the jar open.
User avatar #40 - shadrach (07/31/2011) [-]
This reminds me of:

Why does dr. pepper come in a bottle?


Because his wife died.
User avatar #35 - legitstonzer (07/31/2011) [-]
do you get paid for doing this? if so great sign me up if not **** that ill fap in the comfort of my bed
User avatar #36 to #35 - badboywantsu (07/31/2011) [-]
they have to test you you and if you are healthy they are strict about not jacking it for like a week to two weeks before each donation. google for how much you can get or whatever else.
#29 - anonymous (07/31/2011) [-]
I prefer it with

"God Doctor, I've tried doing it with my right hand,
I've tried with my left, I even got some random guy walking past to try it

But I can't get the lid off this jar"
#28 - SweetJesus (07/31/2011) [-]
Old people...they just don't give a 						****					.
Old people...they just don't give a **** .
User avatar #47 to #28 - crocohr (07/31/2011) [-]
this was filmed couple a years ago near my town in Croatia
#37 to #28 - deadinferno (07/31/2011) [-]
you have absolutely no 						*************					 how long I wave been looking for this GIF
you have absolutely no ************* how long I wave been looking for this GIF
+1
#25 - sackfulloapplez **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
-1
#23 - kapurass has deleted their comment [-]
#27 to #26 - SweetJesus (07/31/2011) [-]
ORIGINAL gangsta
#30 to #27 - Thelo (07/31/2011) [-]
ORIGINAL Ganster
Comment has been flagged   Hide Hide All +Fav (0) Reply +2
#38 to #30 - anonymous (07/31/2011) [-]
This image was flagged 10/29/2013
#31 to #30 - Thelo (07/31/2011) [-]
*gangster
0
#17 - originaltroll **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
-2
#15 - evilreselfan **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #16 to #15 - aidentech (07/31/2011) [-]
you'll go to the post and yell something along the lines of " ******* repost"?
#13 - bobJML (07/31/2011) [-]
I heard this joke before, but still pretty funny.
I heard this joke before, but still pretty funny.
#12 - anonymous (07/31/2011) [-]
This just in, this joke was used just YESTERDAY. On the FRONT PAGE. And now, back to you Barbara.
User avatar #34 to #12 - legacyofkain (07/31/2011) [-]
No it wasn't.
#11 - anonymous (07/31/2011) [-]
repost
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