THE OFFICIAL GAME OF
ITEMS NEEDED TC) PLAY:
1. Tons of bottle rockets
2. Two Inflatable Sex Dolls
4. A Snack, trust me, you' ll get hungry.
HOW TO PLAY:
First, you have to have two teams, how many people doesn' t matter,
all you need to know is that most of them will not come out alive. What you do
is have the two teams go to opposite ends of a room in your house, preferably
one without those nice drapes your girlfriend just brought, I mean, yeah they
ddn' t look like they would match in the store, but jesus, when it' s in the house it
sort of ties the room together, y' know'? She sure has an eye for these
things.... you should call her after you' re done reading this.
Anyways, when each team is on the other side of the room you each
take an inflatable sex toy, cover it in a shitload of gasoline, and prop them up
on each side of the room where your tease is. The two teams will then light off
bottle rockets in an attempt to destroy the other team' s sex toy. When one
team finally destroy' s the other' s sex toy, the team that lost must now vote on a
player to take the sex doll' s place, and the teams play again, if the selected
person is hit with the rocket, he will most likely start on fire, if he survives, bribe
him with money so he doesn' t sue your ass, we don' t want him getting a lawyer,
do we now? But then again, he' s kind of poor, so the only lawyer he could get
is that guy from behind the dentist' s office who never graduated from
collegerules it was a community , I know, right? Damn... anywho,
if he dies, proceed to carry his body over to his ex girfriends house and hide
him in her closet. What? You' re asking what if he never had a girlfriend? I
don' t know! Tie him to a flag pole and salute his ass for all I care, you' re the
criminal here, you figure it out!
So... the cops will find her, take her to jail, where she' ll probably be
gang raped by a bunch of chicks with adam' s appleseed don' t ask they don' t
tell. What is it now? You' re asking why she couldn' t be raped by a hot chick?
Damn! God, you' re retarted! No wonder you had to repeat the third grade, you
honestly couldn' t tell the difference between red and green? opposite sides of
the spectrum, dude! What, did you live underneath power lines or something?
you did? I' m sorry man, I shouldn' t have said all that. Sometimes ajust get
carried away.... So.... uh.... how' s your mom? She still has
cancer.... yeesh... you' re just one big ball of melancholy ain' t ya?
I do not in any way condone you killing anybody with
bottle rockets and framing chicks... seriously, I' m not
that dumb. And I shall not be held accountable... unless
the judge thinks it' s Nty. NOT EVEN IF HE
THINKS IT' S FUNNY BECAUSE IT' S NOT!