School sick

You reaaaally want to get that checked out.
As in immediately, you might have a hernia or some other internal complication.

naw, just an ulcer. oh, wait. fuck.

"sweet jesus mother of god" is the correct annotation of the face, but its exactly the same as what you said though.
If im drunk i feel good after i vomit :p

You're both wrong, it's "sweet Jesus have mercy".

^^This man is correct. It was originally Sweet jesus have mercy.

does it matter? either way, it was misused in this comic

But you know it was more like Ferris Buellers Day ON, you know cuz it was all the stuff he wanted to do.

What is this "finger trick"

you know...

stick your finger down your throat to trigger your gag reflex, vomit everywhere

**Splant rolls 999**

fuck that dick with your face? :(

Fuck that dick with your face!

**TheDemonator rolls 543**

Right on it, sarge.

**Zaivia rolls 458**

Cover that vehicle with my dick?

**yelperman rolls 131** Ramirez, roll trips!

**lvlonochrome rolls 364**

**heklate rolls 346**

**nogzilla rolls 448**

Ramirez cover that machine gun with your dick!?

**TheUltimateFail rolls 060**

Ramirez! Break that Burger town with you letters from home!

**woddyallenspencase rolls 126**

**therollingstoner rolls 303**

**icktomi rolls 023**

**bowlosugar rolls 394**

**kidutsu rolls 878**

eat that emplacement with my dick? easy.

**dasbrot rolls 548**

**thespaceman rolls 545**

**chickenbaconwings rolls 301**

**aurelius rolls 818**

**freezingoven rolls 228** Why the fuck not?

**chunkiehoff rolls 840**

**mcdiddles rolls 200**

defend that 3rd world army with letters from home?
OKAY!!!!

**koolaidmanrulz rolls 140**

**bugkiller rolls 108**

**wfddfw rolls 597**

**pallyhater rolls 489**

**cntrlaltelite rolls 673**

**thefunnyjunkers rolls 763**

**quincychaney rolls 261**

defend burger town with my teeth?

**CHEENO rolls 307**

**frozenedge rolls 861**

Wow... mine actually makes sense.

**kreystas rolls 092**

Break that Dick with my Helmet?

:S

**omegleownd rolls 919,217,604**

**romaniantiger rolls 384** LET'S DO THIS. LEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEROY JEEEEEEENKIURGH

ROMANIAN TIGERS. THE ONLY SPECIES OF TIGERS THAT CAN DESTROY BOMBS WITH THEIR DICKS.

Wait, I fucked up the numbers...
Destroy that patrol with an M203.
Not as fun :C

**stygian rolls 231**

defend that bomb with your teeth, lol wut?

**coolfuzzy rolls 511**

oh boy i like where this is going

**DerpDerpDurr rolls 801**

Eat the third world army with your teeth
k

**pipsqueakaso rolls 553**

**jscrunchies rolls 735**

Ramirez, take out that bomb with your knife.

**nikoxasylumz rolls 021**

**zetsumeitaka rolls 471**

**nikoxasylumz rolls 182**

**blademeister rolls 618**

suppress that haji with my dick... k

**tetroll rolls 855**

**halflife rolls 017**

**raymarston rolls 226**

Defend that Bunker with your Boots!

**colinnorris rolls 469**

**thheawesomesuace rolls 331**

**fickdich rolls 040**

**pyrelord rolls 756**

well, I'm out to take out that vehicle wit mah boots.

**anubislol rolls 477**

cobver emplacement kevlar? wat.

**remainsx rolls 761**

**mattthesexykat rolls 618**

993

**dkillakai rolls 907**

...

yea, that's about what I thought also

**stealthybutscratch rolls 541** roll

disarm that machine gun with your teeth...

**MotleyCrue rolls 658**

**Jboi rolls 456,117,069** rolling

Break that BurgerTown with your face LOL

**deathstarslayer rolls 323**

Favorite movie ever!!

That guy was awesome in "Glory"

Bueller?
Bueller?
Bueller?

Ferris Beullers Day Off

feris buhlers day off (FUCK SPELLING)

YOU MUST WATCH IT NAOW!!

Whenever I'm home alone, i get all paranoid.

So do I, what a coincident

It's like I always feel like someone is going to rob my house... I also have a huge fear of getting stabbed for some reason...

I guess that's only natural
Alot of fucked up things may happen due your unexcused stay at home. The chance is slim but it's there.
It's not that bad here in germany but still...
especially if you're living in the third floor.

My 2 fears are that I wether get caughed by my mom or that someony will come in through the balcony.
Once in our old flat, a guy actually treid to open our balcony floor with a screwdriver or smth.

Good thing that my cousin stayed over the night.
We were only 12 and 13 back then.
Imagine how fucking scared we were.
Especially when we saw him.. and even more when he saw us.

I can't really remember what happened after that, I guess he ran away but I'm not sure.
I guess he was seen my our neighbours who called the police.


...yeah, dunno why I told this story.
But getting paranoid in these situations is pretty normal I guess

Thats pretty normal i guess, considering you live in Germany, a lot of strange shit went down there.

when i was at home alone in my house if i heared a little creek or sound of wind im like ''holy fucking shit theres a ghost in my house!''

i was about 10 when i did that alot

I'm 14 and my mom still doesnt let me stay home alone. FML

My parents must trust me o_o They've been letting me stay home alone since I was like 7...either that or they suck at parenting.

you called?

hey mom, whatcha doin on funnyjunk? You back from your trip yet? When can I watch the news again?

My mom trusts me, shes just REALLY overprotective. If i lived with my dad It would be awesome because he lets me do whatever I want and hes a really good parent.

story of my life

i know that feel bro

UR not

you are definatly not

I'm Indian too, and I've gotten it to work a few occasions.

well your parents arent as strict as mine

no they prob aren't.

They hardly show the good cartoons anymore though :\