tl;dr DON't SHAVE YOUR ASS
Edit: Thanks guys! First front page, leveled up a bunch, just to clarify, I did not originally write this, it's not about me, I didn't know the original author, so I didn't give credit.
Think about this. You just spent 5 whole minutes reading about a guy shaving his matted, thick ass hair, and now you're looking in the comments to see what other people think about it.