11. Hang a picture ofyour roommate on the wall. Throw darts at it.
Smile at your roommate often, saying things like, "How nice to see
12. Get a can of beans. Label them "jumping beans". Eat them, and then
jump around the room. Get another can of beans. Label them "Dancing
beans". Eat them, and then dance around the room. Get another can,
and Label it "Kill your roommate beans". Eat them, smiling at your
13. Every time your roommate falls asleep, wait ten minutes, and then
wake him up and say, ", it' s time for you to go to bed now."
14. Insist that your roommate recite the "Pledge of Allegra me" with
you every morning.
15. Recite "Dr. Seuss" books all the time. Eventually, think up melodies
forthe words and sing them, loudly, directly to your roommate. If he
tells you to stop, act offended and spend the day in bed.
16. Put up traffic signs around the house. If your roommate doesn' t obey
them, give him tickets. Confiscate something you roommate owns
until he pays the tickets.
17. Walk, talk and dress like a cowboy at all times. ofyour roommate
inquires, tell him, "Don' t worry little buckaroo. You' ll be safe with me."
18. Complain that your elbows, knees, and have been
bothering you. Get a screwdriver, and pretend to fix them.
19. Paint abstract paintings, and title them things like, "Roommate
dying in a car crash," and "Room mate getting whacked in the head
with a shovel." Comment often on how much you love these paintings.
20. Wear glasses and complain that you can never see anything. Bump
into walls and floors. Put your clothes on backwards. Say, "Who' s
That?" every time your roommate enters the room. When you’ re not
wearing the glasses, act like you can see fine.
Hound these on the web and Hound them hilarious. That' s why i decided to post them on
Funnyjunk. thou like it - i' m glad. thou did it - i don' t care. Ifit' s a repost - I' m sorry. if
someone knows offends the person who wrote this, please tell me so i can give him the
cred its of his work. I don' t care about thumbs.