Man Rules. . Man Rules At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down We always hear 'the rules' From the female side ...l' llow here are the rules fro
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Man Rules

Tags: man | Rules | one
Man Rules
At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down
We always hear 'the rules' From the female side ...l' llow here are the
rules from the male side.
These are our rules!
Please note.. these are all numbered '1 I
ON PURPOSE,
1. Men are NOT mind readers.
1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You' re tit big girl. If it' s mg, gut it
down. We need it mg, you need it down.
You don' t hear us complaining about you leaving it down.
1. Sunday snorts: It' s like the full moon or the changing of the tides.
Let it he
1... Cg,{ ing is blackmail.
1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Devious hints do not work!
Just say it!
1. Yes and No are perfectly answers to almost meg;
ques_ tion.
1. Come to us with tit growler only if you want hen; solving it.
That' s what we do. Tymothy is what your girlfriends are for.
L An hm we said 6 months a o is inadmissible in an
argument. In fact. all comments become Hull and void after if
Days.
L If you think you' re fat. you brobably are.
Don' t ask us.
L If something we said can be intergrated two ways and one of
the ways makes you sad or angry. we meant the other one
L You can either ask us to do something Dr tell us how you want
it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do Lt, just do
it yourself.
L Whenever . Please say whatever you have to say
during commercials.
L Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do
yhr_
L ALL men see in only 16 odors. like Windows default settings.
Peach. for example. is a fruit. not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.
We have no idea what mauve is.
L If it itches it will be scratched..
We do that.
L If we ask what is wrong and you say 'nothing.' We will act like
nothing' s wrong. We know you are lying. but it is just not worth
the hassle.
L If you ask a guestion you don' t want an answer to. Eng an
answer you don' t want to hear.
L When we have to go somewhere. absolutely anuthing you
wear is fine... Reawwy.
L Don' t ask us what we' re thinking about unless you are
to discuss such tomes as baseball or motor snorts
1. You have enough clothes.
1. You have too many shoes.
1. I am in chage. -it IS a shag!
L Thank you for reading this.
Yes. I know. I have to slag on the couch tonight;
But did you know men really don' t mind that? It' s like camming.
...
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Views: 73002
Favorited: 207
Submitted: 01/09/2010
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Comments(550):

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#11 - anonymous (01/09/2010) [-]
I agree with number 1...
#20 - Razim (01/09/2010) [+] (1 reply)
the best rule is rule number 1
#41 - nalluc (01/09/2010) [+] (6 replies)
when i read the "if we have a itch we will scrach it it's what we do" i was scratching my ass cheak
User avatar #43 to #41 - HappyPie (01/09/2010) [-]
Just this once I will be a Grammar Nazi
1) You spelled scratch wrong the first time but spelled it right the second time WTF!!
2) You have no punctuation.
3) You did not capitalize your I's.
4) You spelled cheek wrong. How the hell do you do that it's the same letter twice!
Yes I know I will probably get alot of thumbs down for this but I don't care. never goin 2 b a geammar nazi again its 2 much work
User avatar #496 - Nick Gill (01/09/2010) [-]
They forgot one of the most important rules!

Men eat meat. We want nothing to do with your soy **** .
User avatar #298 - Daedalusy (01/09/2010) [+] (1 reply)
Oh my God, number 1 is my favorite!! So true!
User avatar #480 - phatmatt (01/09/2010) [+] (1 reply)
i agree with #1
#35 - anonymous (01/09/2010) [+] (3 replies)
do any of you have girl friends
and just to tell you i'm a guy, this is funny, and i'm not going to be back
so don,t say"do you have a girlfriend".
#37 to #35 - anonymous (01/09/2010) [-]
do you have a girlfriend?
#408 - anonymous (01/09/2010) [+] (1 reply)
only number one is true :)
#356 - anonymous (01/09/2010) [+] (1 reply)
Rule #1 is so true o-o
#74 - anonymous (01/09/2010) [-]
I am a woman, and looking at it from this point of view......IT ALL MAKES SENSE???

captcha: j'aime (:
#49 - anonymous (01/09/2010) [+] (3 replies)
Pumkin is a vegetible <spelled that way on purpose
#58 to #49 - anonymous (01/09/2010) [-]
you my sir are very wrong, pumpkins ARE fruits... just like you first son will be.
#327 - anonymous (01/09/2010) [+] (3 replies)
i lol'ed at #1
User avatar #310 - Mward (01/09/2010) [-]
I like #1 the best
User avatar #249 - Anzc (01/09/2010) [+] (8 replies)
What the **** is "Mauve"?!
User avatar #198 - Acrylic (01/09/2010) [+] (7 replies)
I showed my wife and her exact reaction was this:

'Go ahead, FJ users, bow down to your shallow god. But remember one thing. We have the pussies, we make the rules!'

I think my wife just won.
#509 - anonymous (01/09/2010) [+] (3 replies)
I have seen this picture countless times. Its not only a repost but its a reposted repost of a repost's repost. We get it.
go ahead and thumbs me down, i am just sick of seeing the same picture repeatedly
User avatar #521 to #509 - LuftWaffles (01/10/2010) [-]
Everything on the internet is a repost of a repost of a repost. OC is only original for 15 minutes.
User avatar #382 - Colonel (01/09/2010) [-]
WHO WANTS KFC!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!?
User avatar #118 - flashfire (01/09/2010) [+] (1 reply)
favorite rule: #1.
#103 - anonymous (01/09/2010) [+] (2 replies)
This is HIGHLY sexist.
#106 to #103 - Dratwotheman (01/09/2010) [-]
This is also HIGHLY true.
#205 - anonymous (01/09/2010) [+] (13 replies)
im a girl and im glad i know this(:


captcha:great
User avatar #214 to #211 - Acrylic (01/09/2010) [-]
Oh yes, yes, because everyone who beleives that women should be treated right is an ugly woman. I mean, really? Not every guy has to be an ******* , maybe if you left your mom's basement once in a while, you'd learn that. Christ sakes, you people annoy the **** out of me. And go ahead, thumbs this down, I honestly couldn't give a **** .
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