How to QWOP. An extensive instructional guide on how to conquer the internet flash game QWOP.<br /> ---<br /> This took forever to make, i think i'l hang the plaque from your genitals
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How to QWOP

How to QWOP. An extensive instructional guide on how to conquer the internet flash game QWOP.<br /> ---<br /> This took forever to make, i think i'l

An extensive instructional guide on how to conquer the internet flash game QWOP.<br />
---<br />
This took ******* forever to make, i think i'll stick to comics. :/<br />
Either way, If you tell me you like my **** , i'll keep making more **** . Simple as.<br />
---<br />
If, for whatever reason, you were expecting a legitimate guide, i can give you some tips on how to actually RUN in QWOP.

A Winners Guide to QWOP
QWOP, if by chance you haven' t
heard of it, is a game about
endurance. Due to the clear athletic
nature of the game, this statement
may have brought to mind: Muscular
Endurance.
Wrong.
QWOP is about how many failures
you, as the player, are able to endure
before violently obliterating either
your computer, or yourself.
I have been playing and analyzing the
mechanics of QWOP in order to bring
you this guide. Hopefully, after reading
through this guide and developing your
own strategies, you will be able to
finish this grueling dash, and put
an end to all of your pathetic self
loathing.
Let' s start with the basics.
Your first step toward success in
QWOP will be to yourself
with the controls
1) caves
You' re going to want to start by
getting into a stance we call "The
Winner."
F V I. e metres
Now that you' re looking like a true Olympian,
it' s time to get you moving! In order to run in
QWOP you must hold down the W button and
frequently tap Q. This action will get your
knee to catch with the ground, propelling you
slightly forward. Repeat this tecnique enough
and you' ll eventually cross the finish line like
the hero you are.
F F 48. 7 metres
THIGHS
Not a big deal, push the bitch over and keep
I LT a Scooting
9 NATIONAL HERO 9
you ran to the end of the track !
in the end, you went:
press space to restart
Congratulations! You just beat QWOP. Take a
picture so you can impress all of your friends.
Hell, save it as your desktop background so you
always remember the moment you became a
professional ******* athlete.
Magikarp
...
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Views: 5633
Favorited: 6
Submitted: 12/17/2010
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What do you think? Give us your opinion. Anonymous comments allowed.
#12 - plainclothesman (12/17/2010) [+] (1 reply)
Got 91.8 meters
User avatar #13 to #12 - Mugikarp (12/17/2010) [-]
This is what we call a "semi-winner".

We don't use the word failure around here, we feel it carries negativity and crushed the spirit.
#17 - wrenthedog (12/17/2010) [+] (1 reply)
#19 - MrRubbers (12/17/2010) [+] (4 replies)
OR, you could acctually run properly?
User avatar #20 to #19 - Mugikarp (12/17/2010) [-]
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA

no.
User avatar #7 - DerpityDerp (12/17/2010) [+] (1 reply)
I have finally achieved national hero. I ******* love you.
User avatar #8 to #7 - Mugikarp (12/17/2010) [-]
No problem bro. :3
User avatar #1 - OOOOOOOOOO (12/17/2010) [+] (4 replies)
LOL'D AT OP, ONE THUMB FOR YOU GOOD SIR!!!
User avatar #5 to #4 - Mugikarp (12/17/2010) [-]
Ya, once i figured out how to associate Q with P and W with O the whole running thing came pretty quick.
#10 - AnomynousUser ONLINE (12/17/2010) [+] (2 replies)
YOU STOLE THAT IDEA FROM ME! THAT'S HOW I GOT MY 100.8!
User avatar #11 to #10 - Mugikarp (12/17/2010) [-]
Lol. um... sorry? haha.
User avatar #9 - darlingechoes (12/17/2010) [-]
Thank you! I have now finally done 100m. Love you so much xDD
#2 - anonymous (12/17/2010) [-]
i dont know why ppl thumbed down. pretty amusing.
-1
#16 - billaman **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
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