Pickup Lines ( Read Description! )

#112 to #102 - Codiak **User deleted account** (12/09/2010) [-]

hahahahahahahaha

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#62 - GrnLantern (12/08/2010) [+] (5 replies)

If I asked you to have sex with me, would your answer to that question be the same as your answer to this question?

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#207 to #62 - Sianator (12/09/2010) [-]

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#65 to #62 - GetSumHamMan (12/08/2010) [-]

#99 to #62 - Gunbabe **User deleted account** (12/09/2010) [-]

maybe

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#100 to #99 - GrnLantern (12/09/2010) [-]

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#101 to #100 - Gunbabe **User deleted account** (12/09/2010) [-]

actually its close to both yes and no right in the middle

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#71 - areaman (12/09/2010) [-]

Are you from Tennesse? Because 7 ate 9. No wait I meant, is that a mirror in your pocket? Or are you just happy to see me. Damn it! Okay okay how about this, how do you like your eggs? Because you skirt would look great on the floor.
Oh fuck it, you want to screw now or not.

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#146 - Chizu (12/09/2010) [+] (4 replies)

roses are red
violets are blue
sugar is sweet
and so are you
but the roses are wilting
the violets are dead
the sugar-bowl's empty
and so's your head...

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#150 to #146 - ponchilio (12/09/2010) [-]

Just awesome.

#161 to #150 - N. Korean citizen (12/09/2010) [-]

lol that was a funny one, i think UberAndrew posted it or something, idk...

#162 to #161 - N. Korean citizen (12/09/2010) [-]

i meant to Chizu

#166 to #146 - TardytheTurtle (12/09/2010) [-]

reason why we should have comment favoriting

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#263 - shouryuken (12/09/2010) [+] (2 replies)

Hey baby, you want some adam west penis?

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#272 to #263 - KabulMan ONLINE (12/09/2010) [-]

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#296 to #272 - N. Korean citizen (12/09/2010) [-]

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#90 - RogueSpartan (12/09/2010) [+] (1 reply)

I've got the best one: Hey, i'd like to kiss your lips, then move up to your bellybutton

Pic Related.

#106 to #90 - girlygirlygirl (12/09/2010) [-]

that is... actually pretty sexy... hahah

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#73 - IAmManbearpig ONLINE (12/09/2010) [-]

Roses are red, <--- this one rhymes. bitches lives rhymes
violets are blue,
get in the van
or i'll stab you

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#243 - AdolfShltler (12/09/2010) [-]

It's not rape if she doesn't say no therefore I always bring duct tape.

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#9 - thatnerdyguy (12/08/2010) [+] (2 replies)

<- posted this a while ago.

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#72 to #9 - billybobthorton (12/09/2010) [-]

yes... i mean no... i mean

shit

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#170 to #9 - melee (12/09/2010) [-]

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#115 - xombiemike (12/09/2010) [+] (3 replies)

Hmmm.... do I break the man code by letting this out just for the sake of thumbs? *sigh*, ok but only because I love you funny junk, and for many of you its probably not a lie.

If you have to work it in conversation naturally, but telling a girl that no one has ever been able to get you off with a BJ will send her into challange accpeted mode.

#144 to #115 - cameren (12/09/2010) [-]

#128 to #115 - xxSiLENTx (12/09/2010) [-]

Ive do that all the time. I will agree that it has worked on multiple occasions. Thumb because im not the only one that does it.

#118 to #115 - LoKiisDead **User deleted account** (12/09/2010) [-]

I fucking do that all the time hahaha works like a charm to haha XD

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#60 - Pedophiliccookie (12/08/2010) [+] (1 reply)

You: Wanna fuck?
Girl: Eww! No!
You: What did I even say?
Girl: "Wanna fuck?"
You: Ok.

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#76 to #60 - sneakypajamas (12/09/2010) [-]

Guy: Hey you want this condom?
Girl: Eww no you freak!
Guy: Pedo smile.
Girl: OH FOR MY LOVE OF GOD HELP!!

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#235 - Unlucky (12/09/2010) [+] (1 reply)

Hi, I'm The Goddamn Batman.

#326 to #235 - AnthonyX (12/10/2010) [-]

LMAO

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#152 - ponchilio (12/09/2010) [-]

Dumb bitch don't like pizza.

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#140 - ProfessorGigsTwo (12/09/2010) [-]

hey, babe. want me to make you a dildo using some paper clips and rubber bands?

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#159 - TheGmeister (12/09/2010) [-]

Hi, my name's David. Now you know what to scream later.

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#68 - phelpswinner (12/08/2010) [+] (4 replies)

best one..

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#69 to #68 - psychosamm (12/09/2010) [-]

I see what you did there...

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#91 to #69 - DJSR (12/09/2010) [-]

Wuh?

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#75 to #68 - TheRealRageGuy (12/09/2010) [-]

#93 to #75 - Zizzerman (12/09/2010) [-]

yes?

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#94 - beavernator **User deleted account** (12/09/2010) [+] (3 replies)

I have good pick-up line too!
"Hi lady, I have something pointy in my pants that's loaded with meat!"

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#95 to #94 - beavernator **User deleted account** (12/09/2010) [-]

Iz my sandvich.

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#111 to #95 - BLUHeavy (12/09/2010) [-]

SANDVICH!

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#104 to #95 - DemonHawk (12/09/2010) [-]

No! It's Patrick!

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#16 - Utkezabanje (12/08/2010) [+] (20 replies)

-Did it hurt?
-Did what hurt?
-When you fell from heaven.
-Awwwww!! ^^
-Cause your face is really messed up. -.-

:)))

#21 to #16 - kneza (12/08/2010) [-]

epic ^^

#29 to #16 - PebbleBinder (12/08/2010) [-]

what did 1 blond womans leg say to the other?

#30 to #29 - Utkezabanje (12/08/2010) [-]

Hope you're gonna tell us? :)

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#32 to #30 - PebbleBinder (12/08/2010) [-]

between us we can make a lot of money :)

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#36 to #32 - Utkezabanje (12/08/2010) [-]

Teehee! ^_^

#33 to #32 - Utkezabanje (12/08/2010) [-]

Teehee! ^_^

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#38 to #33 - PebbleBinder (12/08/2010) [-]

Why did the blonde scale the chain-link fence?
To see what was on the other side.

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#37 to #33 - PebbleBinder (12/08/2010) [-]

How can you tell if a blonde has been using the computer

The joystick is wet.

#39 to #37 - Utkezabanje (12/08/2010) [-]

hahaha :D I know those two :D Awesome >.<

#45 to #39 - PebbleBinder (12/08/2010) [-]

Why are dumb blonde jokes so short?
So brunettes can remember them.

#43 to #39 - PebbleBinder (12/08/2010) [-]

What did the blonde say when she looked into a box of Cheerios?
"Oh look! Donut seeds!"

#41 to #39 - PebbleBinder (12/08/2010) [-]

What do a moped and a blond have in common?
They're both fun to ride until a friend sees you on one.

BTW not OC

#44 to #41 - Utkezabanje (12/08/2010) [-]

hahaha

#49 to #44 - PebbleBinder (12/08/2010) [-]

A blond, a, brunette and a red head were stuck on an desert island when they found a magic lamp. They shared out the wishes 1 each. The brunette wished to be at home with her friends.The redhead wished to be at home with her friends.
The blond burst into tears and wished for her two friends to come back.

#48 to #44 - PebbleBinder (12/08/2010) [-]

What did the blonde customer say to the buxom waitress (reading her nametag) ?
"'Debbie'...that's cute. What did you name the other one ?"

#47 to #44 - PebbleBinder (12/08/2010) [-]

What's a blonde's favorite nursery rhyme?
Humpme Dumpme.

#46 to #44 - PebbleBinder (12/08/2010) [-]

Did you here about the blonde who shot an arrow into the air?
She missed.

#50 to #44 - PebbleBinder (12/08/2010) [-]

11 blonds and 1 brunette were hanging of the wings of a plane.The called out that he wouldnt have enough fuel to land safely. One of them had to go. After a lot of arguing the brunette said she would do it. So before she let go she gave a touching speech. All the blonds clapped

#42 to #39 - PebbleBinder (12/08/2010) [-]

Where do blondes go to meet their relatives?
The vegetable garden.