Flipping T mug T are as
I am Filipino, but people often mistake me her Chinese due m
y pale skin. Another Filipino co- worker semes in while I am
irking with a customer. We exchange greetings in Tagalog,
Filipino language with sema Spanish influences.)
u. -r. tamer: "Gay that again. That thing you said that ether
u. -r. tamer: “Came awe’. That' s Spanish! What deas a Chinese
dude need knew Spanish fer?"
Er: "Actually, f-"
u. -r. temari: "Gay something else in Spanish!"
Er: "sir, I dent speak Spanish very well."
u. -r. temari: "Came en! Say seomthing!"
u. -r. temari: “view! Hey, w you speak Chinese?"
u. -r. temari: "Came en new! You must knew sema Chinese!"
u. -r. temari: “New say something in Japanese!"
u. -r. temari: "Japanese!"
Third Time Is Not Charming
I work in a ground office, and am usually the only one
working within view of both the Front and back doors. J
Cu. -Hemmer: 'coming in hem the back hallway"' "Hello, Cm here
fer my appointment."
MEY: "With whe?"
Ha: “I think yeu' in the wrang whee."
customer: "Oh, terribly awry." 'goes back down m the
backdoor, and reappears hem the front door a new minutes
eater"‘ "Hello, Cm here sea [Name] fer my appointment?"
He: "Ma' am, this is the same whee. You have go dawn the
stairs in the parking let get [Company Name]. They' re en
the basement level."
customer: "Oh! That explains it, thank yeu!" 'heads out the
frend door again, but wanders back down the back hallway
almost comedia tel y *
He: "still in the wrang place, ma' am. You need go
Cu. -Hemmer: *sceaming and glaring' "Ytou' re much less pelata
than the ether twe beys!"
Corrupt The Kids And “few! Have Ht”
m a female. I' recently shaved my head her charity. J
thestorm" s Sen: "Mum, there' s a !"
customer: 'distracted' “Is there darling?"
thestorm" s Sen: "Yes, at the sauntar."
fr. he mother glares at me. J
customer: “I see."
thestorm" s Sen: "Can I be a ?"
customer: “He. He you canned."
fr. hey Finish what they‘ re doing and as they‘ re leaving the
mother caius me ever. J
Cuitemark: “I dent care what you w at heme, but if you
want pass fer female in public, buy a d'"'"'" wig. Ytou' re
Making Phoney Claims
A female customer has just left the stere after receiving her
order. She then returns, extremely agito ted. J
customer: "My pheny is missing!"
He: "Did you leave it in the stere?"
C) f course net! Cm net stupid. ft was in my car!"
Ha: “I' m sorry, ends turned in a pheny."
f The customer then proceeds m search all ever the not-
exa shop, including overturning the wastebasket in
the restroom and questioning other patrons. Meanwhile, I
take my rather expensive phone m check the
customer: "Hey, that' s my pheny!"
customer: "Dal lie ma! people whe werk someplace like
this cant afford phenis like that! Is that why you made my
erday take so leng? Se you cerld steal my phone?"
He: "Are you saying while your was being made, I
snuck wt the back deer, ran around the building, found the
ena car in the parking let that balenced you, brake in, stale
your pheny, and get back in time help the next customer in
Cuitemark: “Se you admit it! Cm calling the polica!"
I Scream Fraud
He: "Hello, [ice cream department]. Hew may I
customer: sounding angry' “I just purchased sema tof your
ice cream fer my sen and new has brenan wt in hives! He has
an allergy and all your ingredients sheild be clearly labelled!"
Ha: “I' m sorry hear that, ma' am. ft deas say that our ice
cream is beth peanut and gluten thee, and our ingredients are
available upen request, as they vary, depending en the type
tof ice cream semaine borders."
Cu. -Hemmer: "Well you didn' t tell me that before! And new my
sen has brenan wt in hives! This is all your fault!"
Me:''!'- I ask what your sen is allergic m?"
customer: "sucrose. I dent see why this matters."
He: raises ' ''' “Bur ice cream deosnt certain
At this point, said customer? young sen walks in, iceking
perfectly fine and eating his ice cream. J
customer: 'surprised' “I teld you wait outside!" "in a
fewer voice"‘ "Land wt tof sight!"
Phoning It In
A customer phones up 5 minutes before we chase, to try and
track some products she ordered but ha vent been delivered. J
He: "Okay, Cm just going need take your contact
details, so I can try and trace your erday. Can I take your
address and your
customer: “I dent have a pheny."
He: “Hew are we speaking new?"
customer: “I dent knew."
Vision Vs Premission
He: “Fer which devia?"
Me: "Which devia weild you like see?"
He: "Can you hear me?"
customer: "Yes, I said twe!"
Ha: “I heard that, but you have tell me which devia you
want sea before I can sell you a ticket."
customer: "Oh, f have pick we?"
Actions Point Louder Than Words
Father: "Hi, Cm here drop eff my sen."
if I notice there is another child with him, who is of Asian
He: “Is this ether child yours tee?"
Father: “Uh , has a foreign exchange student hem Japan."
He: “Sh! That' s nice. Does he speak English?"
Father: “Ne, nena at all, actually."
He: "Well, deas your sen speak Japanese?"
Father: "Nat a lick."
He: “Hew are we supposed communicate with him? This is
an cutdeep camp, sir. He cerld get hurt if he cant understand
Father: “I' m sure yeu' ll be fine. Just paint a let."