Needs to sharpen those burglary skills. .. At first I thought "What do you mean he needs to sharpen his burglary skills? He got the couches out of the van just fine," but then I realized that t Needs to sharpen those burglary skills At first I thought "What do you mean he needs his skills? He got the couches out of van just fine " but then realized that t
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#1 - nyj
Reply +101 123456789123345869
(03/25/2013) [-]
At first I thought "What do you mean he needs to sharpen his burglary skills? He got the couches out of the van just fine," but then I realized that the two men were the burglars.
User avatar #10 to #1 - licestr
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(03/25/2013) [-]
yeah i looked at this 5 times before i realised that too.
#4 - whitcher
Reply +57 123456789123345869
(03/25/2013) [-]
The van was just gonna drive off with the doors wide open. Suuurrre.
The van was just gonna drive off with the doors wide open. Suuurrre.
#15 to #4 - anon id: d489d14a
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
Oh my god imagine that **** hopping towards you in the middle of the night and then looks at you..
#19 to #15 - HordeyWordey
Reply +7 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
Comment Picture
User avatar #6 to #4 - crackmaster
Reply +22 123456789123345869
(03/25/2013) [-]
well **** if you're being caught in the middle of a burglary wouldn't you?
User avatar #7 to #6 - demandsgayversion
Reply -1 123456789123345869
(03/25/2013) [-]
Wait, I thought those guys were moving and the third guy was the burgler
User avatar #8 to #7 - crackmaster
Reply +14 123456789123345869
(03/25/2013) [-]
i just figured the first 2 guys were the burglars because of the title. if the second guy was the burglar the title would probably be something like "awesome burglar skills"
User avatar #9 - shallneverrepost
Reply +30 123456789123345869
(03/25/2013) [-]
Who the **** robs a sofa, I mean their not exactly high on the value to weight or bulkiness ratio
User avatar #12 to #9 - ronyx
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(03/25/2013) [-]
I second this
User avatar #17 to #9 - HordeyWordey
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
Some people just need a couch, I guess.
User avatar #62 to #9 - asongulol
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
Those were the casting couch.
User avatar #20 to #9 - yodaddysofat
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
sofa......so good
#11 - Shmuck
Reply +23 123456789123345869
(03/25/2013) [-]
Comment Picture
#13 to #11 - houstonlt
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
the more i look at it the funnier it gets, but i have no idea what that is.
User avatar #80 to #13 - doctadeathbench
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
caution: large epic internet fight coming up
#91 to #80 - houstonlt
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
Did I just caused a ********* without knowing it?
User avatar #92 to #91 - doctadeathbench
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
yes, yes you did
#14 to #13 - anon id: e23fffe9
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
It's security-camera footage from America (I think).

The guy who comes around the building proceeds to hurl a brick at the window, hoping to shatter it in order to get into the building which had a computer that he wanted to steal. He doesn't seem to understand the concept of bulletproof glass, and it proceeds to kick his and his accomplice's arses.

What really gets me is that he hurls the brick with every ounce of his crackhead strength, hears a loud *THUD* as his buddy hits the ground behind him, and decided that the best course of action would be to challenge the bulletproofness of the bulletproof glass with another projectile.
User avatar #16 to #14 - largeheadphones
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
I dislike how you start off with "camera footage from america" makes america seem full of *********.
#18 to #16 - anon id: e23fffe9
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
Oh? These two individuals represent America as a whole?

They are individuals. People. People exist in every country. These two individuals decided to try to shatter bulletproof glass. They just happened to be Americans, so what?

If I would have wanted to make all Americans look like *********, I would go about it in some other way.

I thought that this footage came from America, which it may very well have. I was trying to inform the recipient of my comment of this, in order to give him or her the most information that I could.
User avatar #21 to #18 - largeheadphones
Reply -3 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
Nvm, to tired to get into an argument fight, but ill do it next time i see an anon comment
#22 to #21 - anon id: e23fffe9
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
Damn, man. You're a Fascist!
User avatar #23 to #22 - largeheadphones
Reply -3 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
Naw, eventually in about a year, you'll be on the other end of the computer, and you will be annoyed by my stupidity.
#24 to #23 - anon id: e23fffe9
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
I doubt it. If I'd be on the other side of my computer, I wouldn't be able to see my screen.
#25 to #24 - largeheadphones
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
#26 to #25 - anon id: e23fffe9
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
I wasn't joking. I was being serious. My computer is on the other side of my room.
User avatar #27 to #26 - largeheadphones
Reply -1 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
You and i both know what i meant.
#28 to #27 - anon id: e23fffe9
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
It's all in your head, I have no idea what you are talking about, so I'll just give you a small tidbit of useless information.

Several vultures sitting in a tree is called a comittee.
User avatar #29 to #28 - largeheadphones
Reply -7 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
I have a comittee in my head. & also...

xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing xing....
#30 to #29 - anon id: e23fffe9
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
I once microwaved a marshmallow. I didn't have a good time after that.

Once, I replaced the sugar with salt, and waited. I then proceeded to casually enter the kitchen while my Parents were eating breakfast, and I went about preparing breakfast for myself, the breakfast being cereal with milk and "sugar". I then ate some of it before informing my Parents that somebody had swapped the sugar with the salt. Seeing as I had recently eaten it, they didn't think it was I, but rather my Sister. They still now, think that it was my Sister, 10 years later.
User avatar #31 to #30 - largeheadphones
Reply -1 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
I once got a boner when my sisters friend was over(i was young like 5-8, somewhere around their) and i always walked around naked, and i started shouting "IT'S ALIVE!!!!" while making my penis bounce up and down.
#32 to #31 - anon id: e23fffe9
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
I once replaced the snuff in my Father's snuff-box with coffee-powder.

Guess who I framed for that..
#35 to #32 - anon id: 74f7fd96
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
I also had sex with my sister several times today. We never use condoms and I tore her cervix out today.
User avatar #33 to #32 - largeheadphones
Reply -1 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
Snuff?
#34 to #33 - anon id: e23fffe9
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
It's like powdered tobacco. You stuff it under your lip. I think that it might be illegal in America, which could explain why you haven't heard of it.
User avatar #36 to #34 - largeheadphones
Reply -1 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
Ahh, Sounds familiar.
#44 to #36 - anon id: e23fffe9
0 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
Neither of those two are me. I do - however - believe that this conversation is growing to a close, what with the "troll-Anons" appearing. Have a nice evening.
#42 to #36 - anon id: 74f7fd96
0 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
Let's just talk here
#41 to #36 - anon id: 74f7fd96
0 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
Do you suck dicks?
#39 to #36 - anon id: 74f7fd96
0 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
Nvm, it's legal in America, but only for medical purposes.
#38 to #36 - anon id: 74f7fd96
0 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
Not me below....
#37 to #36 - anon id: 74f7fd96
0 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
Do you suck dicks?
User avatar #45 to #36 - largeheadphones
-1 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
DAMNIT ANONS I WAS TALKING TO THIS MAN!
User avatar #43 to #36 - largeheadphones
-1 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
But its oh so annoying.
User avatar #40 to #36 - largeheadphones
-1 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
I cant reply to your comments now, idk if we reached a limit or something.
#54 - tomthehippie
Reply +18 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
Fun story time is fun!   
   
I once worked at a Tuesday Morning (google it). We had this one cracked out bitch show up and start looking around the store.   
   
She picks up this ******* ugly as **** purse that had literally been there longer than my manager (who had worked there for over ten years at that location). This was my first clue that she was going to try to steal a lot of ****. The next clue was she picked up these but ugly bedding sets we had. Starts loading up this cart with random ass ****.   
   
She comes up to the counter and asks if her boyfriend can pull his truck up to the door so she doesn't have to push her cart that far. Dumbass assistant manager agrees. I tell him she's probably going to steal everything in the cart (which has easily five to six hundred dollars worth of items in it), he acts like he's Ronald Weasly and I just called the Chudly Cannons a bunch of losers.   
   
So the boyfriend parks the truck right outside our front doors (literally parking on the sidewalk to do so) and the cracked out girl comes back inside.   
   
I can't make this up, this little cracked out girl, who's maybe 5'3", and might weigh 80 pounds grabs the cart runs it out to the truck, rips open the back (it's the side by side doors) and he-mans the whole ******* cart, with everything in it, into the back, closes the truck up, jumps in the passenger side and they drive the **** off.   
   
******* crack heads didn't even take the license plate off. Not four hours after this happened the a cop pulled them over for speeding and when he ran their plates, he saw the theft charges and sure enough, all the **** (and the cart) were in the back.   
   
Gif related, it's what I was doing the next day when my manager told me all of this, and that she had fired the assistant manager and I was going to be promoted, cause I was the keyholder (regular employee, but I got paid more and had keys to the store, kind of a junior assistant manager type ********).   
   
tl;dr? Yeah, then you missed out on a funny story.
Fun story time is fun!

I once worked at a Tuesday Morning (google it). We had this one cracked out bitch show up and start looking around the store.

She picks up this ******* ugly as **** purse that had literally been there longer than my manager (who had worked there for over ten years at that location). This was my first clue that she was going to try to steal a lot of ****. The next clue was she picked up these but ugly bedding sets we had. Starts loading up this cart with random ass ****.

She comes up to the counter and asks if her boyfriend can pull his truck up to the door so she doesn't have to push her cart that far. Dumbass assistant manager agrees. I tell him she's probably going to steal everything in the cart (which has easily five to six hundred dollars worth of items in it), he acts like he's Ronald Weasly and I just called the Chudly Cannons a bunch of losers.

So the boyfriend parks the truck right outside our front doors (literally parking on the sidewalk to do so) and the cracked out girl comes back inside.

I can't make this up, this little cracked out girl, who's maybe 5'3", and might weigh 80 pounds grabs the cart runs it out to the truck, rips open the back (it's the side by side doors) and he-mans the whole ******* cart, with everything in it, into the back, closes the truck up, jumps in the passenger side and they drive the **** off.

******* crack heads didn't even take the license plate off. Not four hours after this happened the a cop pulled them over for speeding and when he ran their plates, he saw the theft charges and sure enough, all the **** (and the cart) were in the back.

Gif related, it's what I was doing the next day when my manager told me all of this, and that she had fired the assistant manager and I was going to be promoted, cause I was the keyholder (regular employee, but I got paid more and had keys to the store, kind of a junior assistant manager type ********).

tl;dr? Yeah, then you missed out on a funny story.
User avatar #82 to #54 - oottovann
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
is it wrong that I pictured them black the entire time?
#84 to #82 - tomthehippie
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
Maybe...

I never saw the boyfriend, but the girlfriend was white trailer trash... maybe she liked a bit of fudge between her legs?
#90 to #54 - aerosol
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
Driver's face when he saw the police cruiser
Driver's face when he saw the police cruiser
#93 to #90 - tomthehippie
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
< crack girl's face when
< crack girl's face when
#55 to #54 - fucklestick
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
#57 to #55 - tomthehippie
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
Yeah? Cool brotastic.
Yeah? Cool brotastic.
#58 to #57 - fucklestick
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
#59 to #58 - tomthehippie
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
#64 to #59 - fucklestick
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
#65 to #64 - tomthehippie
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
on a side note, why am I being thumbed down for Ed Edd and Eddy pictures?
#66 to #65 - fucklestick
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
Don't know, wasn't me bro.
#67 to #66 - tomthehippie
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
Meh, what ever.

By the way, that picture made me laugh.
#68 to #67 - fucklestick
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
I try.
#69 to #68 - tomthehippie
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
inb4 spidermanandoverherewehaveatonofpurplelines.jpg
#70 to #69 - fucklestick
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
Running out of sloth memes, i'll post dark souls nek :D
#71 to #70 - tomthehippie
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
Same here with the tripple E pics. I'll probably just post random **** next.
Same here with the tripple E pics. I'll probably just post random **** next.
#72 to #71 - fucklestick
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
Someone is going to see this thread, and be like "lolwut"
#74 to #72 - tomthehippie
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
Yeah, right?   
   
Oh, and someone went and thumbed you down. I corrected this injustice.
Yeah, right?

Oh, and someone went and thumbed you down. I corrected this injustice.
#76 to #74 - fucklestick
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
Then i shall repay you in kind good sir.
#77 to #76 - tomthehippie
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
Awesome sauce!
Awesome sauce!
#78 to #77 - fucklestick
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
I love how the dude just covers up the hole in the end.
#79 to #78 - tomthehippie
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
Right? Like he's thinking, &quot;oh, well, he's ******. Might as well close it up, nobody will notice&quot;!
Right? Like he's thinking, "oh, well, he's ******. Might as well close it up, nobody will notice"!
#81 to #79 - fucklestick
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
DOLPHIN ATTACK PLAN BETA, KILL THAT SEAGULL.
DOLPHIN ATTACK PLAN BETA, KILL THAT SEAGULL.
User avatar #88 to #81 - fucklestick
+1 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
IT WON'T LET ME REPLY TO THE LIKE A BAWS POST D:
#85 to #81 - tomthehippie
+1 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
LMAO! Yeah, I call it &quot;antiairdolphins&quot; in my images folder.   
   
LEIK A BAWS!
LMAO! Yeah, I call it "antiairdolphins" in my images folder.

LEIK A BAWS!
#86 to #77 - mootfourchan
Reply -2 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
that moment when you notice that they are the same person
#87 to #86 - tomthehippie
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
...

they work at a bar, it isn't hard to believe that they might have to wear a uniform...

How are they the same person? You can clearly see the guy who runs over and closes it standing in the background the whole time...
User avatar #89 to #87 - mootfourchan
Reply -2 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
same face + same clothes + same hair = samefag . Illusions bro, illusions....
#47 - whiteblob
Reply +10 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
LOL, this reminds me of a time where they broke in my step-moms shoe store and they stole a lot of boxes but to their surprise the boxes only contained the left foot shoes so they went back another day to try to steal the right foot shoes and that's when they caught them.
LOL, this reminds me of a time where they broke in my step-moms shoe store and they stole a lot of boxes but to their surprise the boxes only contained the left foot shoes so they went back another day to try to steal the right foot shoes and that's when they caught them.
#53 - flaccidman
Reply +8 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
At first I was like ewwwww.... why would you steal those? But then I saw these were not the same sofas.
#61 to #53 - akkere
Reply +3 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
But flaccidman,

Why wouldn't you steal those?
#48 - khellor **User deleted account**
+5 123456789123345869
has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #49 to #48 - mikaelkid
Reply +6 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
He went to the wheel to drive, it's one of those vehicles
#50 to #49 - khellor **User deleted account**
+2 123456789123345869
has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #51 to #50 - mikaelkid
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
You're welcome kind sir, someone thumbed you down, but I negated the negative thumb
#52 to #51 - khellor **User deleted account**
+1 123456789123345869
has deleted their comment [-]
#75 to #52 - danslfi
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(03/26/2013) [-]
thumbs for both of you
#2 - bitchplzzz
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(03/25/2013) [-]
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