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#6368 - kristinalice (06/24/2012) [-]
Hey there.

So I'm pretty fucking sad. Not depressed, but sad.
So here it is.

I was pretty fat when i was in Primary school, so I was never noticed by guys, but I was always pretty good friends with them. Then, by about 8th grade, I was doing lots of sport, and eating properly, and I'm in fairly good shape now. (size 8-10, Also, not sure if it's different for America and stuff, but I'm Australian, so i dunnolol) Anyway, all of my guy friends have girlfriends, except the ones that are shorter than me (I'm pretty short). I have always liked this one guy, and we were best friends in primary school, but have kinda grown apart, because I have to go to an all girls school, so I barely ever see him.
He and his girlfriend have broken up.
But I don't want to make a move. I've never had a boyfriend before and it's probably due to my fear of rejection and low self esteem.

Also, I've been friendzoned by pretty much every guy I know, because I pretty much act like a guy, except I have boobs and a vagina. Like, never wearing makeup. I can't actually remember wearing makeup unless you count the time I was a khaji'it.

I posted a pic of me, just for reasons of "am I actually horrifically bad looking, or do I actually have a chance".

Advice, please.
#6519 to #6368 - N. Korean citizen (06/24/2012) [-]
I'm not sure what your deal is, but you're actually pretty cute. I'm not trying to be nice or any of that shit, im just saying that you're attractive. Got it? Moving on.

But, im not sure what youre looking for. You said you have always liked this one guy, but you dont wanna make a move? If you do like him, you should start small, like just messaging him or texting him or something every so often. If you used to be best friends, try to rekindle that feeling. But try to also make it known that you've grown up since primary school and you're not exactly the same person, otherwise you'll be friendzoned again. This way he might actually think of you as more than a friend but a potential girlfriend.

Now about the whole "not wearing makeup" thing. Honestly, just a bit couldnt hurt. And im not hinting that youre ugly. I think if you wear nicer clothes and just a bit of makeup it doesnt just make you look better, but it makes you feel more confident with yourself (which is more important).

Now go kick some ass.
#6507 to #6368 - infernoburrito (06/24/2012) [-]
Either you're compliment fishing or you have no idea that you're pretty. Where are you even from?
User avatar #6453 to #6368 - paintballpatjas (06/24/2012) [-]
Took me a while to write this, I had to pick all my teeth up off the floor when my jaw dropped (that's a compliment BTW).

If there's a party, club or general Aussie type celebration going on that you know he's going to, you should go with him, ask him to dance if he's just hanging around, or better yet if he's already dancing, but with nobody in particular, just go ahead and dance with him. Any time a girl approaches a guy for a dance (or asks him out), it makes him feel like a total alpha male, and it's virtually impossible for him to turn you down if he's stuck between the choices of dancing alone, or hanging around without a girl. I know a lot of people have trouble approaching a girl or guy when they're with their friends, but since you were best friends in high school, you could start a conversation on something as casual as "So what have you been up to?" (Note if he ever offers you a drink (hopefully not a roofy colada) NEVER decline, to men it's a sign you're not interested in moving to the next step, order something non alcoholic if you have to). If it's really so distant that you can't meet up, try Facebook chat and then asking him to move to texting. It's a hard gauntlet to pass, harder for girls even, koalafication is totally right in that you at least have to start talking.

That's my piece, I dunno what's it's like for Aussie's (I'm Canadian), but a lot of guys do prefer girls who don't wear makeup, or they like the petite type, or even the tomboy (more than you may know). The honest truth, and this might make you think I'm a creep, but there's probably at least a few guys who've masturbated to the thought of you, any guy who says they don't masturbate to the thought of some of the people they meet is a total liar. Last idea, show him what you wrote here on the advice board to show him you're interested, along with every response of advice (maybe not my post though), how could ANY guy not be moved by that?

BTW, nice Minecraft Necklace.
User avatar #6469 to #6453 - kristinalice (06/24/2012) [-]
Oh, and the alcoholic beverages isn't such a good idea, considering I'm 15. XD
User avatar #6467 to #6453 - kristinalice (06/24/2012) [-]
Thank you so much. :3 This has really helped. I think I might just do that. Every few months our schools hold dances and he goes to one of the schools that gets invited. I might just do that.

Thank you.
User avatar #6378 to #6368 - whitenail (06/24/2012) [-]
If you have the inkling to tell him how you feel then for God's sake tell him quickly. If you wait then you could grow further apart, or he could get into another relationship or something and that would just make things more difficult, but if you act quickly then the worst that can happen is he says he just wants to be friends (but either way it's sorted out) or the best that can happen is a relationship!
User avatar #6372 to #6368 - koalafication (06/24/2012) [-]
To be entirely honest, it depends pretty much entirely on how he feels about you since you obviously have feelings for him.
Did you talk much at all previously?
User avatar #6373 to #6372 - kristinalice (06/24/2012) [-]
I'll put it this way.. it's kind of like the opposite of a sassy gay friend. Me being the sassy gay friend. Except I'm not a lesbian. More like, I would give him advice and shit and comfort him if he was sad.
User avatar #6374 to #6373 - koalafication (06/24/2012) [-]
What kind of friendship do you have with him right at the moment?
User avatar #6377 to #6374 - kristinalice (06/24/2012) [-]
It's a bit more distant. I haven't talked to him in a while. Only on facebook and stuff.
User avatar #6379 to #6377 - koalafication (06/24/2012) [-]
Couple of pieces of advice for you; since you're a bit more distant than you used to be you'll probably want to start by trying to start talking again. All you want to do is start a conversation with him. I'm not suggesting you start right off the bat talking about how you should catch up, all it is is a friendly convo trying to catch up with an old friend. See what he's up to, how school/uni/etc is going. Just get some talking going.

Try to avoid slipping back into your old position of 'sassy gay friend'. Comfort and advice are both things that good friends should give to each other, but if you want to be more than friends you're going to have to offer him more than that.

I can understand how you're feeling, rejection is a horrible, daunting thing when you've never experienced it before. But what you need to understand is that you have to cross that barrier eventually. If you leave it til later, you're leaving more and more wonderful opportunities and experiences in the dust until the day you finally do go for it. At which point all of your previous off-putting will seem absolutely petty.
#6380 to #6379 - kristinalice (06/24/2012) [-]
You are an advice god.

I might just go do that. Thank you.
User avatar #6385 to #6380 - koalafication (06/24/2012) [-]
More than happy to help.
If you want to talk about it more later just hit me up with an inbox.

Also in response to 'just for reasons of "am I actually horrifically bad looking'; you're actually very beautiful and you have a lovely smile. No creepiness intended, just personal opinion.
User avatar #6369 to #6368 - irmcmuffin ONLINE (06/24/2012) [-]
Don't fear rejection, the worse that could happen is a no, where you can hopefully still remain friends, and If they say something worse than no, you shouldn't want to be with them.
#6370 to #6369 - kristinalice (06/24/2012) [-]
But.. no's are awful.
But.. no's are awful.
#6413 to #6370 - lolme (06/24/2012) [-]
Think of it like this, if you end up in a relationship, awesome, if he says no, kind of awesome. If he says no, you will be sad for a few days or weeks but you will get over him, but if you stay like you are now it can last for fucking ever.
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