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#99 - anonymous (10/17/2013) [-]
drink tons of apple juice before you go to bed

you'll get diabetes
#90 - bazda (10/17/2013) [-]
"Drink a ton of apple juice before you go to bed."

Yeah, a massive jump in blood sugar should make sleeping really easy!
User avatar #41 - formerlyaceseleven **User deleted account** (10/17/2013) [-]
drinking a ton of apple juice will also result in ******** yourself.
User avatar #139 - kikx (10/17/2013) [+] (2 replies)
Drink lots of apple juice to have cool vivid dreams?

What's the point of them if you're gonna wake up 'cause you have to tinkle
#119 - cosmohill ONLINE (10/17/2013) [-]
I am so sick of hearing this "Jump UP if a car is going to hit you" ******** . No. Don't jump anywhere you thick **** . Let's make this super clear as you were already retarded enough to get hit by a ******* car.

-If you jump sideways, HOORAY, you'll probably be ok, the car can still hit your legs, but you'll survive at the very least. (Though you risk getting caught under a wheel, so make sure you can jump far enough.

-If you jump up WELL **** SON, because 2 things are about to happen. Firstly your legs are going to get snapped from underneath you, turning your head towards the windscreen, and secondly, that shatterproof windscreen is about to pop out of place and hit the driver in the face. Now we have 2 serious injuries instead of one, if not two deaths.

-If you want to do it like dem stuntmend from duh TV.... Well you're actually on the right track. Face away from the car, then aim to literally get your ass on TOP of the bonnet, like you're trying to sit on it. This keeps your legs clear of the wheels and presents a nice cushion. Next spread your arms like you're trying to fly and curve your back a little because the next bit is going to hurt. You're trying to get as large a surface area as you can (Your whole back) to hit the windscreen. I'm not going to explain why, if you understand basic physics, you already know. Assuming you're an average height this SHOULD keep your head clear of the windscreen, but tuck that ****** in anyway, because it's like a ******* egg. TA-DA, you've seriously increased your chance of surviving (depending on the speed) and reduced chance of permanent injury, whilst also insuring the safety of the asshole who hit you.


Source: I'm a Road Safety Officer

User avatar #105 - catdownstairz ONLINE (10/17/2013) [+] (1 reply)
According to this airplane mode just makes your phone superior in every way
#102 - thelonegodilla (10/17/2013) [+] (1 reply)
"Wrinkles in your shirt?"
Iron it.
Just ******* iron it.
What's wrong with you lazy berks?
#100 - iamsofakingawesome (10/17/2013) [-]
Apple Juice one is true, but you will absolutely piss yourself at night.
User avatar #132 - knightr **User deleted account** (10/17/2013) [-]
Upgrading to IOS7 will make you iphone waterproof
#131 - cazabrow (10/17/2013) [-]
MFW scrolling down top comments and one after the other people show how these tips ****** up.
#127 - EdwardNigma ONLINE (10/17/2013) [-]
>Drink tons of apple juice
>Go to bed
>Have incredibly vivid nightmares

This doesn't seem like a one way street. Also, you can just put some water on a mosquito bite and the itching will go away.
#124 - tehyanx (10/17/2013) [-]
Those ping pong balls are 						*******					 turtle eggs. I cant even.
Those ping pong balls are ******* turtle eggs. I cant even.
#117 - ratytang (10/17/2013) [-]
want to cure your head ache, cut a lemon in half and rub it in your eyes, you will forget about your head ache with the excruciating pain in your eyes
#112 - Dwarf (10/17/2013) [-]
**Dwarf rolled a random image posted in comment #55108 at Brony board ** I never knew you could make a cotton ball disappear by soaking it in vinegar and holding it to a bruise.
**Dwarf rolled a random image posted in comment #55108 at Brony board ** I never knew you could make a cotton ball disappear by soaking it in vinegar and holding it to a bruise.
#96 - vashy (10/17/2013) [-]
Pretty anything?!?
Pretty anything?!?
User avatar #21 - krasisisback (10/17/2013) [-]
How about instead of ice cubes you throw a damp wash rag in with the shirt?
#16 - zight (10/17/2013) [-]
is the alcohol one limited to only pretty anything or can it be used for ugly anything as well
User avatar #9 - baddrawer (10/17/2013) [-]
I just put listerine on a pimpel, now my balls tingle alot
the pimpel is on my penis
User avatar #6 - notsureiffunnyorjk (10/17/2013) [+] (1 reply)
...was I the only one who flipped at the Tracy Chapman song being played?
User avatar #5 - kasperoster ONLINE (10/17/2013) [+] (2 replies)
If my shoes are too small chances are they dont ******* fit, especially with 3 ******* socks. Genius
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