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#278 - saladtongsofdeath (04/02/2013) [-]
steps to surviving a zombie apocalypse:
1. (pre infection) learn to fly an airplane
2. (pre infection) master the katana... swords never run out of bullets
3. (pre infection) become a decent shot
4. (pre infection) learn to fend for yourself in the wild (food, shelter, water) (inb4 bear grylls pee jokes)
5. (pre infection) stock up on bullets and canned foods... everyone and their mothers are going to have guns, bullets eventually run out, once that happens bullets will exponentially increase in value and you can use bullets as bargaining chips whenever you need it.
6. (post infection) survive off canned food and water for a couple of weeks and use your survival skills to trap and breed rats/coons/possums/rabbits, any critter with a high birthrate and pass the time while natural selection weeds out the weak among humans.
7. (post infection) now with your survival skills, learn the route to the nearest airport and remember, only travel at night... you cant see them, they cant see you (goes for bandits and pillagers) as far as zombies go, you can use your bred critters to distract them while you make your escape
8. absolutely NO dead weight... chances are that you are probably going to gather comrades along the way to the airport, just make sure that they are pulling their fair share.
9. now using your pilot skill, highjack an airplane and fly to one of the islands in greece... greece has over 1000 islands and some of them are deserted... AKA zombie free
10. once you found a suitable place to live in greece, you can focus on living your life to your hearts content
#269 - aerosol ONLINE (04/02/2013) [-]
In all honesty, I hope it doesn't happen. If it does, I can almost guarantee my first 4 hours of the apocalypse will be spent crying in the corner my living room. If I manage to form a plan after that, I might make it day or two.
In all honesty, I hope it doesn't happen. If it does, I can almost guarantee my first 4 hours of the apocalypse will be spent crying in the corner my living room. If I manage to form a plan after that, I might make it day or two.
#268 - anonymous (04/02/2013) [-]
i am currently serving in the swedish military and have been on 1 tour in afghanistan, and i could say that if there was a zombie "Apocalypse" the military would probably quarntine the area and then dispose of the threat given the circumstances that it would be a slow containgious virus.
#259 - alexjonez (04/02/2013) [+] (1 reply)
#257 - falconxmard (04/02/2013) [-]
**falconxmard rolled a random image posted in comment #192 at 2 kind **
this is what I will use to survive the zombie apocalypse
#240 - anonymous (04/02/2013) [-]
what if we take all these zombie ideas and send them over to the inmates in prison?
#220 - anonymous (04/02/2013) [-]
A zombie apocalypse will never happen with a military. A zombie can't destroy a tank, jet, helicopter, Humvee, etc.
User avatar #217 - Onemanretardpack (04/02/2013) [-]
Jokes on you, I don't go outside

Awww I just made myself sad..
User avatar #210 - DrBobsPatient (04/02/2013) [+] (6 replies)
why is everyone wanting to have a huge group of survivors? i'd want less... i mean not just one other person, but maybe 4 or 5
#204 - anonymous (04/02/2013) [-]
My Zombie plan?

Let the Military handle it like every Zombie movie/game ever forgets to take into account.

Seriously. You ******* are goddamn stupid, thinking this could actually happen in a first world country with at least a semi-competent military.

"LOL IM GONNA GET ON MY ROOF WITH MY GUN AND MY DOG AND WAIT IT OUT" No, you're gonna fall off your roof and get torn to pieces you stupid redneck.
User avatar #171 - turdburgalar (04/02/2013) [-]
Speak for yourself.
#170 - ohitshim (04/02/2013) [+] (1 reply)
for all of you people wanting a zombie apocalypse to happen, ever stopped to thin, oh I don't know, maybe you'll get infected from the start?
#164 - anonymous (04/02/2013) [+] (1 reply)
my zombie plan, gather as many people as possible, leave city, and become hunter gatherer nomads essentially living like genghis khan.
this provides security in both numbers and the ability to evade large numbers of zombies and you can hunt **** tons of wildlife to stay fed
User avatar #140 - jellywolf (04/02/2013) [+] (1 reply)
Honestly in the beginning of a zombie apocalypse, its all luck on whether or not you survive.
They guy who's prepared for this **** with a fallout shelter and ten years of food/water, could be out in public and be one of the first infected. While the skeptic who never thought it would happen heard about while he was safe at home and locked himself up in his neighbors fallout shelter.
User avatar #66 - notzachjohnson (04/02/2013) [-]
I enjoy how people are talking about this like its a video game...oh houses contain melee weapons and a katana last from 10-15 hits....i found the people who dies withing the first hours of the apocalypse guys.
User avatar #59 - guiguito (04/02/2013) [-]
don't think so
probrably that zombie who starved
besides i can run like **** , and there is plenty rooftops where i live, so, i would never end on the ground, that i can asure you
User avatar #44 - MonkeyManz (04/02/2013) [+] (1 reply)
i can't even prick my granddads finger for his blood how can i stab people in the head
#34 - anonymous (04/02/2013) [+] (1 reply)
got a zweihander and knight armor since my dad collects stuff like that :D, zombies can't chew through metal right?
User avatar #32 - bigshaner (04/02/2013) [-]
psh, I have a military Tomahawk, machete, two bows, plenty of hunting/skinning knives, then 2 shotguns, two rifles, and then a 1911. (O and not to mention a little saw'd off i found.) Come to Minnesota if you want to survive.
#1 - unclebourbon ONLINE (04/01/2013) [-]
**unclebourbon rolled a random image posted in comment #1199653 at Friendly **
I'm ready for this **** . Bring it on.
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