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User avatar #521 - isradam (08/04/2012) [-]
We don't even believe in Hell lol.

But it makes me sad that orthodox jews in Israel do not behave like the ones in, well, the rest of the fucking world.
#559 to #521 - Unoriginal (08/04/2012) [-]
Lucifer was cast into hell in the Old testament. Yet thou shalt be brought down to hell, to the sides of the pit.
Source(s):
Isaiah 14:15
User avatar #747 to #559 - isradam (08/04/2012) [-]
Again, Jews do not believe in hell, at least not the way christians do. To us, it is a place where the soul is cleansed of sin for 10 months so it can pass unto heaven.
User avatar #778 to #747 - Unoriginal (08/04/2012) [-]
#1 How can you not agree w/ a scripture that supposed to be in the Torah?

#2 The actual time in which someone is supposed to spend in Sheol is based on the sin they committed in their lives, the max being 12 months according to most Rabbi.
User avatar #779 to #778 - isradam (08/04/2012) [-]
Have you read the Torah? 'Cause everyone has to read it here in Israel, it's a school subject. It's pretty interesting but there are maaaaany things that are not present in the Old testament and vice-versa.

It's very complicated and shit.
User avatar #780 to #779 - Unoriginal (08/04/2012) [-]
I understand that, being a novice bible scholar myself, that most of the doom and gloom never "you'll never escape" scrips about Hell are in the NT but even as a Jew Christ described Hell in such a manner even before his resurrection. (mat 23:33) + (Matthew 25:41)

I also meant to say OT as a whole not just the Torah (First 5 books of the OT).
User avatar #781 to #780 - isradam (08/04/2012) [-]
Did I mention Jews do not care for Jesus? He ain't even mentioned in the Torah. I guess it makes sense, since it's kindof a dick move to say you're the son of god to people who believe we are all equal.
User avatar #782 to #781 - Unoriginal (08/04/2012) [-]
I know you don't but Christ was a Jew that taught that was my point.

But not believing He is the Christ also doesn't make sense, the man had fulfilled all the prophesies concerning who the Messiah would be and what He would do, the amount of gold He'd be sold for, the fact that he was called Hosanna on Nisan 4 and crucified on Nisan 7 just like the passover lamb. But all of that is unimportant, as you know the Jews have always been right with God... right?
User avatar #787 to #782 - isradam (08/05/2012) [-]
He has a funny way of showing it.
User avatar #797 to #787 - Unoriginal (08/06/2012) [-]
Who has a funny way of showing what?
User avatar #798 to #797 - isradam (08/06/2012) [-]
God has a funny way of showing we're right with him.
User avatar #803 to #798 - Unoriginal (08/06/2012) [-]
I was being sarcastic there are plenty of time in history in which Israel hasn't been right w/ God the OT will tell you that, this is, of course going nowhere as you don't really even know what you believe obviously. I'm not mad I just thought we would be able to have an in depth conversation about this but that's not going to happen.
User avatar #805 to #803 - isradam (08/07/2012) [-]
Oh oh, yes we can. I just didn't catch your sarcasm, sorry.
I admit that along our own history we've been huge douchebags.
#525 to #521 - N. Korean citizen (08/04/2012) [-]
so what is the punishment for the jews, and is it only for the joos ?
User avatar #527 to #525 - Sethorein (08/04/2012) [-]
10 months of a hell like thing... and there are 7 rules for non jews.

do not murder
do not steal
do not be adulterous
do not bear false witness
respect god and believe in one god
set up courts
do not eat the limb off of a living animal

Only hard one is believe in one god... and if that is your only sin, the ten months will be easy
#530 to #527 - N. Korean citizen (08/04/2012) [-]
what about gay boyz ?
User avatar #540 to #530 - isradam (08/04/2012) [-]
You can be gay, you just can't have sex with another man. Also, there's nothing written against lesbians, because lesbian sex does not waste sperm.

Also, the punishment for eating food that's not kosher is that when the rapture comes, you will not be allowed to eat the super delicious meat of the three legendary beasts: The Behemoth, the beast of the Earth the Tziz, the beast of the heavens and the Leviathan, the beast of the seas.

FUN FACT! DID YOU KNOW THAT GROUDON, KYOGRE AND RAYQUAZA ARE BASED ON THOSE 3 BEASTS??

User avatar #531 to #530 - darkjustifier (08/04/2012) [-]
Why would it matter if they were gay?
#537 to #531 - N. Korean citizen (08/04/2012) [-]
I just want to prepare.
#539 to #537 - darkjustifier (08/04/2012) [-]
That's not exactly what I was asking but oh well.
That's not exactly what I was asking but oh well.
#568 to #539 - watanigga (08/04/2012) [-]
Guys relax, the bible is just a fiction novel. calm down.
User avatar #534 to #531 - softcover (08/04/2012) [-]
Not to mention sex before marriage is OKAY. frowned upon, but it won't get you killed...
User avatar #509 - CRosBY (08/04/2012) [-]
Nobodies perfect.
User avatar #503 - castellandraco (08/04/2012) [-]
sees money on the ground and donates it right...

and an overpriced sandwich id bet
User avatar #499 - leetpwnzer (08/04/2012) [-]
What hell would be on that sammich?
User avatar #519 to #499 - isradam (08/04/2012) [-]
Ohhoho, you have no idea. First, it would have the best damn pastrami you have ever eaten. Secon, some nice sliced pickles and a little bit of mustard. Lastly, yes a bit of lettuce and it would all go inside the most delicious bread in the world, called "Pletzaleh", which is incrusted with a bit of onion and sesame.
User avatar #523 to #519 - leetpwnzer (08/04/2012) [-]
Interesting. My girlfriends a Jew. but she's a woman,so it balances out financially..
User avatar #502 to #499 - Sethorein (08/04/2012) [-]
lettuce
User avatar #506 to #502 - leetpwnzer (08/04/2012) [-]
Just lettuce...wow. That like say "I'll have an B.L.T. without the B."
User avatar #513 to #506 - Sethorein (08/04/2012) [-]
Lox and cream cheese is also a favourite
#492 - N. Korean citizen (08/04/2012) [-]
Its funny because
A.The Trinity is never mentioned in the bible
B. The Trinity is implied later on in words that were mostly likely not the words of jesus
C.Jesus explicitly said There is One Fucking God none of that 1+1+1=3 bullshit
that makes no fucking sense
Read what Jesus actually fucking says and use some common sense.
Fuck The Trinity its retarded and whichever high ass roman who came up with it
#576 to #492 - Razgiz (08/04/2012) [-]
You do realize most of the books in the Bible were written several hundred years after the death of Jesus right? So we don't know Jesus' exact words anyway, and the Holy Trinity is one of the main things in the Bible as Jesus, God, and the Holy Spirit comprise it.
User avatar #553 to #492 - jkelder (08/04/2012) [-]
the trinity is god. There is God, Jesus and the holy spirit. They are all the same thing. God is God Jesus is a material representation of god and the holy spirit is like an immaterial representation of God on earth. It is all quite simple.
#577 to #553 - heldiggrisen (08/04/2012) [-]
So all the pictures I've seen of Jesus praying, he's praying to himself?
User avatar #500 to #492 - Sethorein (08/04/2012) [-]
what is this a reply to...
#490 - finni (08/04/2012) [-]
I'm a Christian and I don't tell people who don't believe in God that they're going to hell. Most of my friends aren't religious.    
FunnyJunk jokes about Christians all the time, I don't mind hearing some of it, if its funny.   
I don't  think that abortion should be illegal or that gays shouldn't be allowed to marry or anything else that the Bible says are not allowed or you shouldn't do, unless its something serious, like killing. I mean, who am I to tell people who think otherwise what they should do with their lives?
I'm a Christian and I don't tell people who don't believe in God that they're going to hell. Most of my friends aren't religious.
FunnyJunk jokes about Christians all the time, I don't mind hearing some of it, if its funny.
I don't think that abortion should be illegal or that gays shouldn't be allowed to marry or anything else that the Bible says are not allowed or you shouldn't do, unless its something serious, like killing. I mean, who am I to tell people who think otherwise what they should do with their lives?
#565 to #490 - N. Korean citizen (08/04/2012) [-]
I love this .gif
User avatar #488 - deansg (08/04/2012) [-]
I live in Israel, and unfortunately the ultra religious Jews in my country are the exact opposite of this. For some reason, in Brooklyn they managed to adapt to the 21st century, while in my country all they do is stay home, study Torah, get funded by the state and try to make us a religious country... Because of this they're actually the most hated minority in the country (more than Arab Israelis in case you wondered)
User avatar #497 to #488 - Sethorein (08/04/2012) [-]
No doubt.

Cut off welfare. Force non-combat military conscription.

If they do not like it, the door is THAT way... Having 10 kids who will never be employed is not making the country strong...
#451 - bandoslootshare (08/04/2012) [-]
same shit with buddism what's your point. the most idiotic group that keeps trying to shove it down people's throats are athiests because they're paranoid they're going to hell and feel the need to debate about it
#439 - niggertonguemyanus **User deleted account** (08/04/2012) [-]
Comment Picture
User avatar #441 to #439 - Sethorein (08/04/2012) [-]
nigger... tongue... my anus ....
#435 - toomuchmonster (08/04/2012) [-]
Comment Picture
#432 - dmaxevilgenius (08/04/2012) [-]
a good jew is just too much too hope for
User avatar #437 to #432 - Sethorein (08/04/2012) [-]
...Who was the first to respond to Haiti againÉ... stupid broken alt key...
#468 to #437 - dmaxevilgenius (08/04/2012) [-]
it was a joke there now your whole life was a lie up til this moment
User avatar #473 to #468 - Sethorein (08/04/2012) [-]
Ha ha... so fahny
#420 - N. Korean citizen (08/04/2012) [-]
I get what your saying but not all Christians try to shove their religion down your throat.
Really the judgmental dicks are breaking their own rules.
User avatar #415 - tuborial (08/04/2012) [-]
after looking through the comments i am glad to see i am not the only one who thought the donating money part was bullshit
User avatar #416 to #415 - Sethorein (08/04/2012) [-]
Tzedakkah...
#436 to #416 - bleeduntildeath (08/04/2012) [-]
god bless you
User avatar #450 to #436 - Sethorein (08/04/2012) [-]
Jews are only greedy cause the christians forced us to moneylend...
User avatar #430 to #416 - AztecJew (08/04/2012) [-]
took the words out of my mouth
User avatar #407 - ellisellisellis (08/04/2012) [-]
It's funny because Jews are a good reason there is no peace in the Middle East.
Fucking Israel....
User avatar #481 to #407 - ivoryhammer (08/04/2012) [-]
Why don't you just share Jerusalem and stop being little bitches about it?
#467 to #407 - softcover (08/04/2012) [-]
I know right? Its not like Israel was originally way smaller than what it is today, and its totally their fault that  when it was created by a 3rd party and put where it was, and than the surrounding countries tried to take it back in a war that lasted a grand total of 6ish days... Israel doesn't have a civilian population, at 16 people must enter the military. Israel = Defensive powerhouse. centuries of people hating on you will generally make a people very defensive of what little they have.   
   
In my opinion, it'd be fine if people were free to worship as they pleased, without the bickering of who's land it was, and more of a mutual respect for each other, Israel will always have that military because they're afraid to lose their home, When the whole world seems to hate you, wouldn't you not want anyone near you?
I know right? Its not like Israel was originally way smaller than what it is today, and its totally their fault that when it was created by a 3rd party and put where it was, and than the surrounding countries tried to take it back in a war that lasted a grand total of 6ish days... Israel doesn't have a civilian population, at 16 people must enter the military. Israel = Defensive powerhouse. centuries of people hating on you will generally make a people very defensive of what little they have.

In my opinion, it'd be fine if people were free to worship as they pleased, without the bickering of who's land it was, and more of a mutual respect for each other, Israel will always have that military because they're afraid to lose their home, When the whole world seems to hate you, wouldn't you not want anyone near you?
#442 to #407 - AztecJew (08/04/2012) [-]
Brilliant, just brilliant. Yes, let's support the "palestinians" and "palestine", which is actually just a roman name or parts of Israel form when the roman empire took control, and refute any Jewish right or claim to Israel, which in every text and every record throughout history has been exclusively referred to as the Jewish Homeland. From the moment G-d granted Israel to Avraham and the Hebrews it has been the home of the Jews. Then after being enslaved and transferred like cattle to Egypt, nomadic muslims mixed with various surrounding groups scattered around Israel, but never under any united name. after Thousands of years, fighting to scratch out a home, a living, a life on this earth, faced with endless hatred, exile and genocide,in 1948 we are finally able to return to our rightful home, where many Jews had already resettled for generations, and we are met with accusations that we stole it. You can rant, you can hate and spew your ignorance on every page you can find on the internet, but we will always survive and the hand that tries to strike us from our home will be swiftly cut down.
User avatar #446 to #442 - Sethorein (08/04/2012) [-]
those soldiers are looking awfully similar to nazis...

listen listen... you are right... but not right... The palestinians may never have existed before... but they do now. They are a united indentifiable group and they NEED a homeland... The only problem is figuring out how both parties can have a homeland without wiping the other out...
#454 to #446 - AztecJew (08/04/2012) [-]
yes, because praying together is reminiscent of nazis. If that were true then every time christians sing or pray in church they are acting like nazis. It's awfully fashionable to throw the term nazi around casually to demonize whatever is convenient for creating a fallacy. Israel wants nothing more than to coexist peacefully, and so do the majority of muslims in Israel, the fact of the matter is that many of the surrounding nations harbor hatred for Israel and will allow terrorist organizations to hide out within their borders, that in combination with anti-Israeli lobbyists and politicians in the UN attempting to back-seat-govern Israel keep trying to muscle Israel's borders more and more in an attempt to appease "palestinian" sentiments, meanwhile we are condemned for protecting ourselves, and that includes Jews, Christians, Muslims, Druids and all citizens of Israel, who all equally become victims to attacks.
User avatar #464 to #454 - Sethorein (08/04/2012) [-]
You said god bless me earlier.

But yeah, with the whole raising an arm up like a nazi salute... I mean... come on... thats a terrible picture.

Chill. You are a little too heated. I am Jewish and horrifically zionist. I defend Israel in all regards but I still understand context...

If you look lower in this thread I made the catch 22 clear, express dominancy, be hated, allow autonomy, be destroyed.
User avatar #472 to #464 - AztecJew (08/04/2012) [-]
I said you took the words out of my mouth, but yes, I see your point, but their hands are on each others heads, not in a salute, it's the Golani brigade in prayer, I don't recall where exactly though
#424 to #407 - N. Korean citizen (08/04/2012) [-]
How dare they exist, right ? asshole....
User avatar #425 to #424 - ellisellisellis (08/04/2012) [-]
Look what they're doing to Palestine.
User avatar #429 to #425 - Sethorein (08/04/2012) [-]
Palestine never existed you know...
#428 to #425 - N. Korean citizen (08/04/2012) [-]
killing terrorists, how dare they.
User avatar #431 to #428 - Sethorein (08/04/2012) [-]
There are civilian issues... you know, blockades and stuff... Israel is not perfect
#438 to #431 - N. Korean citizen (08/04/2012) [-]
They are literally surrounded by Nations that want to exterminate them, so there is little room for being a hippie lib.
User avatar #440 to #438 - Sethorein (08/04/2012) [-]
I agree. It is a catch 22. Israel keeps a chokehold on its neighbours and the world hates it. Israel relents and it is destroyed. No winning... But you cannot ignore that sometimes Israel is not perfect.
#443 to #440 - N. Korean citizen (08/04/2012) [-]
There is no such thing as a perfect country.
#518 to #443 - softcover (08/04/2012) [-]
What about Denmark? They protected the Jews in WW2, to the point where even their king was thrown in jail... plus, now they're wealthier than anybody and have lots of crazy sex all day... at least that's what I hear anyway...
User avatar #448 to #443 - Sethorein (08/04/2012) [-]
That is all I was trying to say
User avatar #408 to #407 - Sethorein (08/04/2012) [-]
Ya, they should all go into the sea like Allah would intend... ah and next America... those horrible horrible Westerners should all die...

I am sorry, but it takes two to tango, kid. Israel is only half of the equation for the middle east conflict
User avatar #410 to #408 - ellisellisellis (08/04/2012) [-]
I said a good reason. I know Islam is also another good reason. I know about it firsthand being a Christian in the Middle East.
User avatar #414 to #410 - Sethorein (08/04/2012) [-]
Islam has very little to do with the conflict... it is primarily the fault of the British for making a stupid mandate... then both parties for bickering like children... though Palestinians are slightly less mature about debating... often declaring intafadas every time things do not go their way so Israel has to pick up its missiles and remind them why they are not supposed to be fucking with it then the international community condemns Israel before investigating...


And suddenly this got complicated...
User avatar #421 to #414 - ellisellisellis (08/04/2012) [-]
It's a lot of peoples fault and I think everyone needs to stop pointing fingers man up and settle it like civilized people.
User avatar #427 to #421 - Sethorein (08/04/2012) [-]
The UN likes to blame Israel... too much...

Makes my blood boil when University campuses post garbage like Israeli Apartheid Week...

Here is a solution. Israel leaves all occupied land. Jerusalem is a joint capital of palestine and Israel and there is land connecting israel to Jerusalem. Gazans are to be relocated to the west bank and the land size of Gaza will be filled in on the West bank territory so that there is no land lost... there just does not need to be a bloody bridge cutting israel in half. All military actions cease.

Problem... no one wants to stop military actions... No one wants to declare a joint capital... So life goes on
#406 - AztecJew (08/04/2012) [-]
1st non-negative or holocaust joke post I've seen here about Jews, I wish I could give more thumbs
User avatar #403 - swittig (08/04/2012) [-]
Claims that Hamas are terrorists

Sends foreign aid to Israel
#400 - N. Korean citizen (08/04/2012) [-]
What kind of dumb shit is this? We all know jews wrote the bible, Therefore there responsible for all the chaos that christianity has caused while they sat on the side lines laughing and getting rich, Fuck you OP
User avatar #412 to #400 - AztecJew (08/04/2012) [-]
Christianity began when paul branched off, initially claiming that they were the REAL Jews and that all the rules we followed were ridiculous to live by and later claimed that "jesus" said that they no longer had to follow the Halakha and essentially make their own rules. How people interpret, whom they choose to follow and believe and how they act in the practice and under the banner of their faith is entirely their responsibility. Attempting to place blame on the Jews or any group is just a cop out, and one that hasn't gone out of fashion in thousands of years. Your frustration and half-formed opinions lead you to point fingers blindly, and it may not even be your fault, it may be a result of your upbringing, but you should place the fault of the sin on the sinner.
User avatar #411 to #400 - Sethorein (08/04/2012) [-]
I discovered combustion... it is my fault people made gun powder and kill each other... damn...
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