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Latest users (6): aoeui, dreygur, Ihazfunkitty, nimba, serhiy, volero, anonymous(2).
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#381661 - tvfreakuk (04/10/2015) [-]
I experienced my first limp hand shake today.
Jesus Christ - how hard is it to just put a little force into your hand? My hand felt so filthy after doing it; but I had to do it 3 times because I was playing a MTG and it's sort of game politeness/etiquette to shake hands with opponents after certain things
#381684 to #381661 - chitogekirisaki (04/10/2015) [-]
I always fist bump at smash tourneys instead of handshakes because my hands get sweaty real quick and I don't wanna even think about other people's hands.
#381745 to #381684 - tvfreakuk (04/11/2015) [-]
I might do that from now on - though it just seems a little weird - most people would probably be expecting the handshake and then they get faltered by my fist being up.   
It was just... So surprisingly bad. Like, my hand still just feels weird, for some reason. It should not bother me this much but it just really fucking does - it honestly felt like he just had no bones in his hand or some shit. It's the only thing that my brain can process as making sense, because it doesn't make sense to me how limp it was when you have the option of it not being like that.
I might do that from now on - though it just seems a little weird - most people would probably be expecting the handshake and then they get faltered by my fist being up.

It was just... So surprisingly bad. Like, my hand still just feels weird, for some reason. It should not bother me this much but it just really fucking does - it honestly felt like he just had no bones in his hand or some shit. It's the only thing that my brain can process as making sense, because it doesn't make sense to me how limp it was when you have the option of it not being like that.
User avatar #381673 to #381661 - freedomreturns (04/10/2015) [-]
My friends were big into MtG, so it was either play it or read every comic in the store, and that gets boring.
Not a single firm handshake.
User avatar #381675 to #381673 - tvfreakuk (04/10/2015) [-]
I've played a quite a few games now - but this was the first limp one. Every other has been fine and the guys I played with seemed fine.
This guy was just awkward and odd.
Plus I kept ending up being near a guy who's only joke was "DICKS HAHA!"
User avatar #381676 to #381675 - freedomreturns (04/10/2015) [-]
They were fine people, they helped teach me to play better.
All their handshakes were just uncomfortable.
Would he literally shout "DICKS" over and over?
User avatar #381677 to #381676 - tvfreakuk (04/10/2015) [-]
It wasn't over and over, it was sort of in response to other people saying stuff, by adding "dicks" to the sentence they just said, but it never really worked.
User avatar #381688 to #381677 - jadewest (04/10/2015) [-]
"yeah my grandma died from cancer"
"you mean your grandma died from cancer dicks HAHA"

quality comedy
User avatar #381715 to #381688 - tvfreakuk (04/10/2015) [-]
I get what you mean; but I think even that guy would have limits to the joke.
#381651 - ruggerpugger (04/10/2015) [-]
Aw, you poor fucking sweetheart, boys are "degrading" you with their eyes! How the hell are you going to control a teen boy that is in puberty? I don't think that most of the boys did anything wrong.

User avatar #381876 to #381651 - thegrohltroll (04/11/2015) [-]
This is the most asymmetrical face i've ever seen
User avatar #381778 to #381651 - hoponthefeelstrain (04/11/2015) [-]
what she wearing wasn't bad tho?
#381667 to #381651 - anonymous (04/10/2015) [-]
oh no, expecting men to control their sexual desires is totally impossible
#381738 to #381667 - anonymous (04/11/2015) [-]
oh no, expecting women to control their sexual desires is totally impossible
User avatar #381678 to #381667 - dreygur ONLINE (04/10/2015) [-]
This just in: Looking is a sexual desire.
#381780 to #381678 - anonymous (04/11/2015) [-]
this just in: wearing a dress is enticing boys to want to fuck you.
User avatar #381669 to #381667 - alexanderburns (04/10/2015) [-]
>boys age 15-18
#381645 - anonymous (04/10/2015) [-]
Princessren! ren! over here! notice me!
Princessren! ren! over here! notice me!
User avatar #381644 - alexanderburns (04/10/2015) [-]
I hate how expensive headphones that aren't shit are.
#381708 to #381644 - nimba (04/10/2015) [-]
I lent my £30 headphones to a friend a while ago, she told me she never realised how good music sounded and seemed surprised that her favourite songs turned out to have bass accompaniments.
But yeah buy some beets what's money worth if not piece of mind.
#381663 to #381644 - misanthrizzle (04/10/2015) [-]
I can just rent some from my library if i want
User avatar #381666 to #381663 - alexanderburns (04/10/2015) [-]
I guess if you don't mind the fact that homeless people masturbate on them
User avatar #381668 to #381666 - misanthrizzle (04/10/2015) [-]
your first mistake was living in a city with homeless people
User avatar #381656 to #381644 - thesoulless (04/10/2015) [-]
You can buy a good pair of headphones for $10. Unless you need super high quality ones for producing or something, anything more expensive than that is jut ripping you off.
User avatar #381683 to #381656 - shibe (04/10/2015) [-]
Try listening to music through good headphones, honestly you'll think you've heard the voice of god.
#381660 to #381656 - ferrettamer (04/10/2015) [-]
>plebs actually believe this
User avatar #381659 to #381656 - alexanderburns (04/10/2015) [-]
>bought $10 headphones at superstore
>sound like I'm listening to things through two very tight buttholes
#381629 - Elk (04/10/2015) [-]
**Elk used "*roll picture*"**
**Elk rolled image** Is it impossible to find a respectful atheist these days? Every one I used to meet was nice, but that just doesn't seem to be the case anymore. They can't be content with their religion. They have to make sure that you agree with them, and it's pretty much the type of bullshit reasons that they would get mad at you for using to back up religion.

I usually try to ignore it, but I started thinking about these people because i was looking up stuff about Penn Jillette. I saw some things he had said, and I personally find it a little disgusting. I'm paraphrasing, but I'll try to get it close.

"Once you've seem a child being born, you know there's no God. When you see all the technology keeping them alive, you see that God just wants them dead. If we were squatting in the woods, the two people I love the most would be dead."

Also, topkek about how atheists use gods in their reasons against religion.

Anyway, he prides himself on his intelligence, which it seems that 95% of atheists do it anyway. I just don't understand how that makes sense to him. Is he implying that technology has been around forever? Is he implying that nobody had children before this technology? Yes, it makes it safer and easier, but that doesn't mean anyone wants them dead.

I just hate how people act about it.

As an atheist spreading those beliefs, all you do is ruin faith.

As a Christian/Muslim/Jew/whatever spreading their beliefs, you're trying to help people achieve life after death, assuming there is one.

It doesn't hurt to believe in something. It doesn't make you any less intelligent. Yes, I can understand that it's more logical that there is no deity, but there are also mysteries that science may not ever be able to answer, and that'd okay. Everything doesn't have to have an answer. Faith doesn't have to make sense.

I'm not super religious, but let me worship the god of my choosing in peace, please.
User avatar #381713 to #381629 - nimba (04/10/2015) [-]
Mr. Jillette is right to be thankful for modern medicine, and is right to be proud; he is very wealthy and talented. What I'm reading from your paraphrase in quotation marks is someone for whom delivery would otherwise be fatal and fatal for the child and his understanding that it was not the grace of god that saved those people but the clever people in the white coats and scrubs.
Perhaps spreading beliefs saves people though why would god expect people to comply with rules they are ignorant to but more likely it feels like it validates one's own belief. Belief does hurt; it hurts the mind in that children who are raised religiously are less able to tell stories about other magic from stories about natural things, it hurts the children when people read Proverbs 13:24, it hurts the women when it reads Timothy 2:12, the slaves in Judges 1:21-35, genocide and global politics in Deuteronomy 7:1-4, 16-24, the witches that obviously exist Exodus 22:17. FYI Matthew 5:17, presuming that the god of Abraham and Jesus is your god then these are also your beliefs. I don't want to shit up the board so PM me if you have any questions.
#381638 to #381629 - epicscorpion (04/10/2015) [-]
Respectful atheists tend to keep that fact to themselves. At the risk of tooting my own horn I have to say that religion is the last thing I want to discuss with someone.
User avatar #381630 to #381629 - dreygur ONLINE (04/10/2015) [-]
Tolerant atheists often prefer to call themselves agnostic.
User avatar #381710 to #381630 - nimba (04/10/2015) [-]
and they are perpetuating misinformation
#381611 - princessren (04/10/2015) [-]
Is this happening to anyone else?   
After you click something on the front page it is no longer on the front page for you
Is this happening to anyone else?
After you click something on the front page it is no longer on the front page for you
User avatar #381617 to #381616 - princessren (04/10/2015) [-]
well I am not donating any money if we get shit features like that, admin
#381635 to #381617 - anonymous (04/10/2015) [-]
>Implying you of all people would have disposable income
#381636 to #381635 - princessren (04/10/2015) [-]
don't tell admin that
don't tell admin that
User avatar #381612 to #381611 - thegrohltroll (04/10/2015) [-]
have you been in a coma for the past month?
User avatar #381614 to #381612 - princessren (04/10/2015) [-]
I was off of funnyjunk for awhile
and the time I was on before that I didnt really look at the FP
User avatar #381619 to #381614 - thegrohltroll (04/10/2015) [-]
it's supposed to make new contents more noticeable, it works if you ask me, but it's not worth it
#381609 - anonymous (04/10/2015) [-]
What's with all the political bullshit content lately?

I swear FJ's becoming even more retarded.
User avatar #381696 to #381609 - crazyolitis (04/10/2015) [-]
It's the /pol/tard trying to condition the people here into thinking the same stuff as them. If you show things often enough, people will start believing it.
Pretty sure something similar happened on tumblr.
User avatar #381610 to #381609 - lobselvith (04/10/2015) [-]

It's been like this for like, a year. Maybe longer.
User avatar #381606 - hoponthefeelstrain (04/10/2015) [-]
Kingeggnog thumbs my shit down and calls me a whore as an anon. If you're going to be this petty at least sign in for it. You're already behind a computer screen
User avatar #381639 to #381606 - cycloneclone (04/10/2015) [-]
What did you do to piss him off so much lol
User avatar #381640 to #381639 - hoponthefeelstrain (04/10/2015) [-]
Not sure, He's been thumbing all my stuff down for like a month now. I don't even know this kid
User avatar #381642 to #381640 - cycloneclone (04/10/2015) [-]
kingeggnog explain yourself
User avatar #381643 to #381642 - hoponthefeelstrain (04/10/2015) [-]
you've brought his wrath upon you
User avatar #381627 to #381606 - Elk (04/10/2015) [-]
User avatar #381631 to #381627 - hoponthefeelstrain (04/10/2015) [-]
You just hate me cause I didn't suck up to you. Also you hold grudges like a baby
#381662 to #381631 - Elk (04/10/2015) [-]
**Elk used "*roll picture*"**
**Elk rolled image** Nah, I was playing. I do, however, straight up dislike you because of how edgy you try to be. It's entirely offputting.
User avatar #381781 to #381662 - hoponthefeelstrain (04/11/2015) [-]
how exactly do I try to be edgy?
#381855 to #381781 - Elk (04/11/2015) [-]
**Elk used "*roll picture*"**
**Elk rolled image** Whatever us the norm is what you try to go against. Rebellion is the only thing that keeps you going. Don't agree with me? Look at you vs your family.
User avatar #381908 to #381855 - hoponthefeelstrain (04/11/2015) [-]
Yea I didn't like being raised in a super Christian family. Had religion that I didn't even understand forced down my throat and when I did have questions all I got was "have faith"
#382270 to #381908 - Elk (04/12/2015) [-]
**Elk used "*roll picture*"**
**Elk rolled image** It had nothing to do with a religion you didn't understand. No religion has all the answers. Faith is believing in something you don't understand. You just wanted to be different, and that's why you act the way you do. When you don't get the attention you want, you become a bitch. Before you even try to tell me I'm wrong, I'm not. I'm speaking from experience. This isn't stuff I just think of off the top of my head. You can talk condescendingly to me and use all the derogatory terms you want, but it doesn't make me any less intelligent, and it doesn't make you any less of a shitty person. I can't blame Kingeggnog. You've never once been nice to me. If I share opinions, you talk down to me. I don't understand why you try to act like you're this perfect person because you're not. There aren't many people on this board I don't like, and there are a lot more that are rude to me, but you take the cake. Don't bother responding. I'm sick of your shit.
User avatar #381607 to #381606 - volero (04/10/2015) [-]
#381604 - finblob (04/10/2015) [-]
Úberfacts and the way people still believe it
#381587 - Elk (04/10/2015) [-]
**Elk used "*roll picture*"**
**Elk rolled image** At my last college, I had a lot of trouble keeping friends. There were about four people [spoiler] that mattered to me [/spoiler] that kept up with me throughout. This one girl was foreign, so she really didn't have anybody at the beginning besides her roommate. I would see them staring at the floor as they walked by, speaking in foreignese. If they made eye contact with me, they immediately broke it. I tried to speak to them sometimes to help them out a bit, but they were pretty shy. I finally decided to try to socialize with her and her roommate. Her roommate absolutely loved the fact that I spoke. It made her day entirely. You could just see the change in composure through her motions and expressions. The one I'm talking about didn't seem to care so much, but she did speak to me throughout the year, so it did mean a lot to me. I'm not one for parties either. I went to one and did not enjoy it. It was like sitting in a chimney, so I never went to another one. This girl finally made other friends and started partying. She got raped one night. It really bothered me badly. It's just that it had to be her of all people. She was a really nice girl. I just feel that if I had been there, I could have stopped that guy and raped her myself.
#381597 to #381587 - sugoi ONLINE (04/10/2015) [-]
Snooze ya looze.
User avatar #381583 - adunsaveme (04/10/2015) [-]
I hate it when porn videos go into a closeup and half the screen is scrote and ass

I came here to see strong wimmin getting pounded mercilessly, not to look at a guy's hairy taint
User avatar #381600 to #381583 - alexanderburns (04/10/2015) [-]
would you be fine with it if it was the woman's scrote and ass?
User avatar #381585 to #381583 - squalllionhart (04/10/2015) [-]
what are you? gay?
User avatar #381590 to #381585 - threeeighteen (04/10/2015) [-]
Faggot probably kisses people with vaginas.
User avatar #381578 - sry (04/10/2015) [-]
User avatar #381601 to #381598 - Darianvincent ONLINE (04/10/2015) [-]
It's gone for you too? He was saying
User avatar #381608 to #381601 - joshlol (04/10/2015) [-]
I remember this happening before with another word filter
User avatar #381603 to #381601 - EdwardNigma (04/10/2015) [-]
Holy shit when I checked yesterday, that was like, 50-100 dollars.
That shit has gone right the fuck up.
User avatar #381602 to #381601 - Darianvincent ONLINE (04/10/2015) [-]
Oh jeez it highlights it.
#381579 to #381578 - anonymous (04/10/2015) [-]
$10 a month so admin can afford a bigger dildo to go fuck himself with
#381572 - anonymous (04/10/2015) [-]
I hate people who stalk profiles and act all creepy to the person they are stalking
#381571 - anonymous (04/10/2015) [-]
I was Listening to the radio today and Military propaganda comes on

>An oil tanker is is being hijacked off the coast of africa
>Terrorists are being watchedfrom 10 miles in the atmosphere
>People just built houses for the poor
>The military, protecting the things we hold dear.

We hate your oil companies, as they fuck us over daily
More and more people are realizing the war on terror is bullshit
Name one time the military built houses and not destroyed them.

Also, does anyone else in california atleast, find it odd that some of the radio stations keep making the emergency broadcast sound at random times during the day.
I know it's not just a test, because if it was, it would only be about once a month.
User avatar #381577 to #381571 - princessren (04/10/2015) [-]
I dunno...I hear the broadcast thing late at night fairly regularly on TV
User avatar #381567 - rockmanfan (04/10/2015) [-]
pointless rant: angryjoe i s fucking douchebag. he made a nintendo video, it got pulled, and he calls nintendo fans dick suckers. the fuck man? what did you fucking expect? do you think rules dont apply to you because you yell at shit on the internet, or are you just a useless cunt who can make more than one review in 3 months?
User avatar #381584 to #381567 - adunsaveme (04/10/2015) [-]
angryjoe is a melodramatic wanker anyway
User avatar #381586 to #381584 - squalllionhart (04/10/2015) [-]
so... he's a youtuber?
User avatar #381592 to #381586 - threeeighteen (04/10/2015) [-]
He's connected with ThatGuyWIthTheGlasses or whatever those people are doing nowadays.
#381575 to #381567 - anonymous (04/10/2015) [-]
he isn't wrong for being pissed, nintendo when it comes to youtube and the internet in general is a retard
User avatar #381576 to #381575 - rockmanfan (04/10/2015) [-]
that much i get, but calling nintendo fans cock suckers was uncalled for
User avatar #381569 to #381567 - profhershellayton (04/10/2015) [-]
Both sides of this are stupid.

Nintendo misses out on free advertising with the way they police Lets plays.
Joe uploaded a game that would get removed and then proceeded to complain when it did.
#381561 - anonymous (04/10/2015) [-]
If music is the only thing that has stopped you from killing yourself, you really need to evaluate your life
If a fad boyband saying "you don't know you're beautiful" is the only thing that stopped you from committing suicide, you need to take a long, hard look at why you continue to live.
#381568 to #381561 - anonymous (04/10/2015) [-]
The only reason I continue to live is because TartTar control told me that jesus is love.
User avatar #381553 - ishallsmiteyou (04/10/2015) [-]
No job, no future, mother's a delirious half dead schizophrenic, dad's losing his mind too and is too physically broken to work, "friends" keep fucking me over in every way possible, and there's nobody to bitch to but the hating board. FUCKING GOD DAMMIT WHAT THE FUCK
User avatar #381599 to #381553 - EdwardNigma (04/10/2015) [-]
You'll be right, mate.
User avatar #381581 to #381553 - squalllionhart (04/10/2015) [-]
that's a very negative outlook
User avatar #381559 to #381553 - masterboll (04/10/2015) [-]
Join the Navy
User avatar #381564 to #381559 - cycloneclone (04/10/2015) [-]
more like Gavy
#381566 to #381564 - freedomreturns (04/10/2015) [-]
More like Gravy.
User avatar #381560 to #381559 - freedomreturns (04/10/2015) [-]
In the Navy, you can live the life of ease.
In the Navy, you can sail the seven seas!
User avatar #381562 to #381560 - masterboll (04/10/2015) [-]

i can remember when this used to scare the shit out of me. this still scares the shit out of me now.

i cant even explain why.
User avatar #381557 to #381553 - cycloneclone (04/10/2015) [-]
Join the Air Force
User avatar #381555 to #381553 - bladeboy (04/10/2015) [-]
Join the army
User avatar #381545 - bladeboy (04/10/2015) [-]
When you take off your glasses and realize how fucked you'd be without them
#381556 to #381545 - cycloneclone (04/10/2015) [-]
then you remember how sexy you look with your glasses off
User avatar #381691 to #381556 - chitogekirisaki (04/10/2015) [-]
he looks like a 14 year old
User avatar #381650 to #381556 - shibe (04/10/2015) [-]
is that bladeboy

wow qt
User avatar #381654 to #381650 - cycloneclone (04/10/2015) [-]
yea he's a real charmer
User avatar #381551 to #381545 - ferrettamer (04/10/2015) [-]
when you aren't a faggot who needs glasses
User avatar #381549 to #381545 - shibe (04/10/2015) [-]
when you look like a nerd with your glasses ;_;

my eyes are too sensitive for contacts, like if you even get near my eye, not even touch it, but get near it my face just starts squirming uncontrollably

it's awful
User avatar #381525 - jadewest (04/10/2015) [-]
I hate how I a few days ago I came home from work to find out my parents were searching through my room, I don't even know what they'd be looking for but Christ let me have some privacy and don't go through my stuff.
User avatar #381692 to #381525 - chitogekirisaki (04/10/2015) [-]
i have the same problem
#381554 to #381525 - anonymous (04/10/2015) [-]
thank god the good tranny is here
all we've had is ren
you need to post more not shit things to rebalance the transforce
User avatar #381570 to #381554 - jadewest (04/10/2015) [-]
thanks mate
#381580 to #381570 - princessren (04/10/2015) [-]
no, Jade
join the darkside
and together we can destroy uh...um...who was the other one...hauntor something? that person, and rule /hating/ as princess and angry teenage girl from nickelodeon sitcom
User avatar #381593 to #381580 - Conquistador (04/10/2015) [-]
Good god... I don't even like star wars and I feel disgusted with the butchery....
#381594 to #381593 - princessren (04/10/2015) [-]
not you too, Connie
not you too, Connie
User avatar #381595 to #381594 - Conquistador (04/10/2015) [-]
What about me?
User avatar #381589 to #381580 - jadewest (04/10/2015) [-]
I'll never join you, you killed my father
User avatar #381591 to #381589 - princessren (04/10/2015) [-]
is that some kind of metaphor for me changing sex and becoming your mother
because that's a low blow, brah
User avatar #381541 to #381525 - EdwardNigma (04/10/2015) [-]
You should hide a grenade in your room.
User avatar #381543 to #381541 - jadewest (04/10/2015) [-]
this is a good idea
User avatar #381544 to #381543 - EdwardNigma (04/10/2015) [-]
Whether you rig it to explode when something is opened is your choice.
That would depend how mad you are.
User avatar #381529 to #381525 - freedomreturns (04/10/2015) [-]
So should I stop?
User avatar #381530 to #381529 - jadewest (04/10/2015) [-]
yes get out of my room faggot
User avatar #381532 to #381530 - freedomreturns (04/10/2015) [-]
I'm taking your knick knacks then.
User avatar #381539 to #381532 - ferrettamer (04/10/2015) [-]
I'm going to take her knickers :^)
User avatar #381524 - hoponthefeelstrain (04/10/2015) [-]
let a company deny white males and watch their tune change
User avatar #381526 to #381524 - jadewest (04/10/2015) [-]
its only discrimination and bad if it affects me - FJ
User avatar #381531 to #381526 - hoponthefeelstrain (04/10/2015) [-]
jesus it pisses me off so bad, The superiority and simultaneous victim complex these fucks have. Then they wonder why they're single.
#381563 to #381531 - anonymous (04/10/2015) [-]
"Women are all disgusting pigs, and every rape is just a good guy getting thrown in jail because a girl regretted fucking them. They're extra stupid because they won't date me, so I take it out on the internet"
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