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Latest users (6): dragondust, greyshirt, leadstriker, LoliSama, marinepenguin, xXThatxOnexGuyXx, anonymous(27).
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#128073 - anonymous (04/17/2014) [-]
Alright guys I have a question for you. So I am dating a girl who is astoundingly beautiful and I'm madly in love with her, however I have a problem.

I can't seem to find anywhere else to ask for help for this. Well, I have a lot of really weird fetishes. Stuff involving expansion and women bloating their stomachs up with air and force feeding and stuff.

The result is that no matter what we do, I can't orgasm because I'm so hardwired to these fetishes. I'm honestly really concerned that I'm never going to be able to feel sexual pleasure with a woman because of this. I've been intimate with 5 women and none of them could make me orgasm.

I can't bring myself to tell her out of embarrassment. What do.
#128173 to #128073 - anonymous (04/17/2014) [-]
Break your habit. Go for a month without masturbating or watching porn. After that your brain should start to reset, because your fetishes are something you learned, not something hardwired.

Ive had problems with this too, but it only took me about two weeks of no porn and no fapping.
User avatar #128150 to #128073 - iridium (04/17/2014) [-]
Stop masturbating to pornography for awhile.
User avatar #128135 to #128073 - ThatFatMummy (04/17/2014) [-]
I have this same problem.

I'm into incest, bestiality and necrophilia. While I'm not really hard-wired to them, as you say, I can hardly get myself to orgasm via masturbation. Vaginal is the only thing that really works for me at all.

My solution is to date freaks. Each girl I've had sex with had their own fetishes, including self-mutilation and doing it in public places.

But since you're so in love with her, I can't think of any solution. Your best bet is to tell her.
#128106 to #128073 - infamoustrapper (04/17/2014) [-]
I'm pretty sure this is a joke. But I'm scared that I can't know for sure if it is or not
User avatar #128100 to #128073 - hawaiianhappysauce (04/17/2014) [-]
Congratulations! You can lost a very long time in bed, which is what women really want.
User avatar #128088 to #128073 - mexicandudeinsd (04/17/2014) [-]
just stop watching any porn of your fetishes
and whenever you start thinking of them think of something normal
also dont fap or watch porn
it kinda worked for me ^~^
User avatar #128087 to #128073 - gandaalf (04/17/2014) [-]
you need fucking babe ruth
to beat the impurities out of you
User avatar #128079 to #128073 - thisismyhandle ONLINE (04/17/2014) [-]
Go to an expert. There are people who specialize in helping people break fetishes that have a serious impact (like yours is having). There are different forms of behavioral and cognitive therapy to help you move on and away from being stuck with such a powerful fetish.

As far as telling your girlfriend, I don't know much at all about your relationship. Whether or not/when you tell her is up to you.
#128076 to #128073 - qwertyjr (04/17/2014) [-]
I don't have the proper training to answer this correctly, but good god imma try. You have two choices the way I see it. One, confess those fantasies and fetishes to your partner, be honest. If you have the will to love her with all your heart, then you have the will to be honest with her too. Or two, relax nigga. Look into other fetishes and try new things. I remember back in 10th grade I was hardwired on porn, couldn't get hard unless it was pornhub. I took a break from my my fetish, resisted sexual urges for about two weeks and my pelvic pal came back up and running. I prefer if you did the first option though, you should be honest with your lover and yourself. Good luck nigga, you can do it.
User avatar #128075 to #128073 - awesomerninjathing (04/17/2014) [-]
fucking wat
User avatar #128072 - ThatFatMummy (04/17/2014) [-]
Is FJ still doing the thing where if you get 500 thumbs on OC you get colored text?

If so, can I get a link to the rules for that?
User avatar #128074 to #128072 - averagewhitekid (04/17/2014) [-]
It auto submits it for you
User avatar #128086 to #128074 - ThatFatMummy (04/17/2014) [-]
Does it have to be one post? Or do all of your OC posts add up?
User avatar #128132 to #128086 - averagewhitekid (04/17/2014) [-]
Any of your posts that reach 500+ thumbs are auto submitted, whether they are OC or not.
If it is, and two mods verify that it is, then you get a little item that you can redeem for colored text
User avatar #128133 to #128132 - averagewhitekid (04/17/2014) [-]
I don't remember how it stacks, but i'll ask addy next chance I get
User avatar #128055 - tazpy (04/17/2014) [-]
I'm doing a research paper in Comp 1 about why zombies are so popular lately and I need help coming up with a good thesis statement.
User avatar #128123 to #128055 - kronon (04/17/2014) [-]
zombies are from a psychological standpoint also a way to vent your fear of other people. They are like normal people but with disturbing features which makes it socially acceptable to fear and combat them. hence their popularity in movies, stories and other means to reach a big audience.
User avatar #128069 to #128055 - gandaalf (04/17/2014) [-]
every year we get closer to real life zombies with all this nano technology and bio-engineering and stuff
#128066 to #128055 - xXThatxOnexGuyXx ONLINE (04/17/2014) [-]
If zombies were possible, and were to become a thing -- People like the idea since it would give them a chance to start new.
No longer would people be better simply because of their wealth; The only person better than you is the one who is able to adapt well enough to the situation and live on their own.

Suddenly everything becomes a free for all. 'Class' is diminished. The only thing making you 'wealthy' would be the amount of supplies you have. (Aka, guns and food.)
User avatar #128089 to #128066 - mexicandudeinsd (04/17/2014) [-]
damn thats some beautiful explaining
User avatar #128058 to #128055 - nigalthornberry (04/17/2014) [-]
Something about how people want to be heros or survivors and a zombie apocalypse is a way average person can be one of those
User avatar #128054 - vortexrain ONLINE (04/17/2014) [-]
What does the Legacy virus do?
#128045 - basanso (04/17/2014) [-]
I'm not all that good when it comes to social interaction (I was normally shunned in school and never had a friend until freshman year of high school) . I usually get stuck without knowing what to say to keep a conversation going, turning it into an awkward silence. With these two combined I became very lonely and decided I needed to find a girlfriend to be happier. Problem: I don't know how. I literally don't. Also how do I keep a relationship going? If anybody could help me that would mean a great deal to me. I'm at a point so low that I cant sleep because of this.

tl;dr - I don't know how to get a girlfriend pls halp
User avatar #128152 to #128045 - iridium (04/17/2014) [-]
1: You do not need a girlfriend to be happier, or to not feel lonely. Don't let anyone deceive you into thinking this.

2: In a relationship, you will likely develop a sense of dependency in your state. You don't want this. What if your relationship doesn't work out? That kind of depression will just hit you harder. And where will you go from there? Are you just going to keep bouncing from girl to girl as the next one in your life? I know an older gentleman who has been through 6 marriages like that, and he has all kinds of issues.

3: Before you get a girlfriend, you honestly should start to work on yourself, your self worth, things like that. Not only will it make you a better match for someone else, but it will make you feel better in life overall.

4: Friendship should always come before a relationship. If you want to be in a serious relationship, you should probably be in one where you consider your girlfriend to be a pretty darn good friend as well and I don't mean like friendzone bs friendship. I mean you trust her, enjoy her company, have fun with her, most of the kinds of things good friends have. .

Now then, improving social interaction. There is no quick way to fix this and I'm probably not the best person for counseling on this matter , but a few things I would advise working on would be to increase the number of social situations you involve yourself in. I joined a school club when I started feeling like I couldn't talk to people. Diversify your interests and knowledge, have fun stuff to talk about. Learn about some stuff that people find easy small talk with. Go to places where people are all there for something similar I talk for hours with strangers at conventions. It's a matter of practice for those of us who don't have the gift of the gab. And perhaps try something that helps you get out of your shell, like choir/singing, acting, dance lessons. Just be sure to start small. Good luck.
User avatar #128153 to #128152 - iridium (04/17/2014) [-]
Actually there was more I wanted to add.

For #4, I also mean to say you should focus on your ability to make friends and be a good friend before worrying about relationships. Being a good friend is also a good part of being a good boyfriend, though there are a few things that are distinct between friends and significant others.

As for girl advice, girls are not some big mean monster that you have to approach as if they're part of some special club. Girls are human beings too. If there's something you really need to work on, then you should work on it. Otherwise, don't take rejection personally, and don't fear that everyone is going to reject you. You may be surprised. A lot of girls are willing to give you a chance, and most of them aren't going to hold it against you or make fun of you for having an interest in them, talking to them, or any of that, and if they do they aren't worth your time in the first place.

Also, a modest, simple complement can go a long way. Never comment on their body however. Something like hair or clothes or accessory.
#128098 to #128045 - girlsxplain (04/17/2014) [-]
First thing you need to do is work on yourself first. Find things that make you happy, try talking to people a little more, and work up a little skill in social interaction. no girl can make you happier with you own faults. Start small: make small talk with your waitress somewhere or when picking up groceries. Nothing very commited. then work on speaking up in class or at work with your opinions. once you get more comfortable with that, work on your social skill with coworkers or classmates. eventually with lots of practice, you will be able to talk more easily without that awkward feeling. until you do that and feel a little better about yourself, no girl will make you happier. Doing this will also make you more appealing to girls, leading to the girlfriend. good luck out there
#128099 to #128098 - girlsxplain (04/17/2014) [-]
once you are more comfortable with this, and im not saying you have to be a social master, but just when you are more comfortable, its important to find a girl that conversation just seems to flow with. Awkward silences are at a minimum, they have interesting ideas and similar interests, and talk about them with her. after a while of talking, get her number. be nice to her while keeping good conversation flow. show mild interest. dont come on too strong but dont seem aloof. eventually things will work out
User avatar #128071 to #128045 - usarmyexplain (04/17/2014) [-]
girlsxplain, you are needed.
User avatar #128070 to #128045 - gandaalf (04/17/2014) [-]
find a group of girls
awkwardly ask if you can be friends
they wont mind cause that's what niggas do
become friends
choose the one you like
be nicer to her than the others
dey all notice
hang out wit her more
ask her out
she says yes
User avatar #128056 to #128045 - herbolifee (04/17/2014) [-]
There's some great stuff on YouTube about seduction and general social skills which you might want to look up. Other than that, try talking to random strangers to train your social skills. It doesn't matter if it turns awkward and you end up leaving. Everytime you try again, you'll do a tiny bit better.

I hope this helps a bit. Good luck.

Also, and unhappy man with a girlfriend won't be happier. It can help, sure, but it might be a good idea to focus on yourself and your situation first before worrying about chicks. Girls are attracted a lot more to happy, confident men.
User avatar #128053 to #128045 - awesomerninjathing (04/17/2014) [-]
how old are you
#128057 to #128053 - basanso (04/17/2014) [-]
17 heading off to college in a few months. Just got lifeguard certified to help with income. Pool club nearby pays well for newbs
#128038 - genericnewfag has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #128090 to #128038 - teoberry (04/17/2014) [-]
Do you need advice?
User avatar #128039 to #128038 - ipostcp (04/17/2014) [-]
I don't understand.
#128040 to #128039 - genericnewfag (04/17/2014) [-]
his auntie is kill
User avatar #128035 - thesemendemon (04/17/2014) [-]
My friend wrote a short story for one of his classes and I thought it was pretty good, where should I post it?
User avatar #128036 to #128035 - blobboy (04/17/2014) [-]
On the inside of your trash can.
User avatar #128037 to #128036 - blobboy (04/17/2014) [-]
I'm just kidding find a website where you can input text and share the link
User avatar #128043 to #128037 - thesemendemon (04/17/2014) [-]
But where should I post it? This board, the books one, normal upload?
User avatar #128044 to #128043 - blobboy (04/17/2014) [-]
You can post it here, I'm curious.
#128049 to #128044 - thesemendemon has deleted their comment [-]
#128047 to #128044 - thesemendemon has deleted their comment [-]
#128046 to #128044 - thesemendemon has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #128030 - kibbleking (04/16/2014) [-]
I've had this account for two years and I still don't know how to check favorite comments.
User avatar #128009 - nativninja ONLINE (04/16/2014) [-]
what should I save pictures as... .JPG?
User avatar #128156 to #128009 - iridium (04/17/2014) [-]
png is best, or high quality jpeg if you have the option and you need a smaller file-size picture than a PNG. Just remember, a JPG will always have white background to fill in empty space, whereas PNGs can have empty backgrounds.
User avatar #128010 to #128009 - derpityhurr (04/16/2014) [-]
png is usually best
User avatar #128005 - nommonsterbaa (04/16/2014) [-]
I know the whole 'there's google, look it up faggot' but I wanted to ask on funnyjunk, reliably be able to ask people about it and such. I want to get weed, but never have. Haven't smoked, drank, done drugs, nothing of the sort, so I'm honestly kind of clueless. I may know a few people I'm decently friendly with that have something to do with it, but not certainly. I just don't know anything like prices so I'm not tossing out ludicrous amounts of money, or anything about quality. Or how to smoke it, frankly. Feel like an idiot asking all of this, but. That's why I came to funnyjunk. Thanks guys, any info helps
#128077 to #128005 - xXThatxOnexGuyXx ONLINE (04/17/2014) [-]
Watch what you're doing; As long as it is still illegal in your state assuming you live in the US , be sure you won't be caught.

The worst I've seen weed do to people is get them in jail.
It has royally fucked over one of my friends. He was expelled from his high-school and spent some time in jail. Since then he kept contemplating dropping out; All because he liked making friends.
That was the only reason why said friends got into weed in the first place. They met more people and gained more friends.
Be smart with how you buy it and use it. Do not have any of that shit near you at school.

Now, if you ever decide to get into any other drugs Not that you will, but randomly deciding "I want to try weed" without any incentive for gaining friends or any reasoning behind it, such as to relieve anxiety... It's kind of off-putting from a spectator's point of view. Especially since you throw in the "Haven't smoked, drank, done drugs" part. just don't.
My sister was addicted to crack at 13. She OD'd twice on heroin. Almost lost her teeth. Possibly has cancer. Can't do basic math. Etc.
Not worth it. What the real drugs do to you is just horrible. Again, the worst weed will do is get your ass in the slammer.
User avatar #128078 to #128077 - nommonsterbaa (04/17/2014) [-]
Alright, thanks. I'm 16, so I don't know how that would affect any legal shit. Of course, I don't plan on getting caught in the first place.
User avatar #128081 to #128078 - xXThatxOnexGuyXx ONLINE (04/17/2014) [-]
Heavily depends on where you live.
But again, I can not stress out enough how you should not have it anywhere near you at school.

Here's a little story of my friend Michael, who was the one whom got arrested:
Michael was 15-16 at the time he started to tell me he was getting into weed at school.
He met a lot of great friends, and some really cute girls that he liked.
Things went well for him. Slowly he started getting into certain pills and started dealing shit out at school.
Eventually though, he cut everything out except weed.
Again, things started going well and he only kept doing weed because of the friends he made. If he wasn't into weed, they weren't into him.
He never had weed on him at school. He tried to play it smart.
One day, though, for some reason he did have a small bag of weed on him. On this exact day, his Principal just so happened to be walking the halls, stopped him, and told him to empty his pockets. Right then and there she brought him back to her office, called the cops, and he was arrested then and there; Spent a few hours detained until his father came to pick him up. From there he was expelled from school. In constant worry if he was breaking a felony or not -- Because this too would fuck his future up completely. Having an illegal substance on SCHOOL grounds is not the best thing to be caught with... He couldn't get into other schools since he was expelled and had to go to a private school. He also had the possibility of going to jail for 3 to 9 months.

After that he stopped talking to me. Stopped talking to a lot of people. Went clean.
His future is darker than it was, with a felony + expulsion on his record...

TL;DR Don't fucking dare do anything with weed at school.
Seriously, that is the worst thing possible. Do whatever outside of school, but don't even try to do it at school or else you're fucked. You'd have a solid future of nothing but part-time jobs at fast-food places.
User avatar #128083 to #128081 - nommonsterbaa (04/17/2014) [-]
I'll certainly keep that in mind. I'm guessing that means getting it at school isn't the best idea? Of course any friends I know that could get it are at school, but I wouldn't be buying it there obviously, then.
User avatar #128084 to #128083 - xXThatxOnexGuyXx ONLINE (04/17/2014) [-]
Take the safe route and have your friends act as a middle-man.
You give them the money, they buy it for you, then make sure they give it to you outside of school.

That way you will never be caught with it on you at school.

Always take the safest route, man.
User avatar #128085 to #128084 - nommonsterbaa (04/17/2014) [-]
Safest is how I plan on playing it, getting caught isn't the most appealing prospect it's sounding like. Thanks a ton
User avatar #128082 to #128081 - xXThatxOnexGuyXx ONLINE (04/17/2014) [-]
Wasn't able to add on this bit, but it's still another shit factor that happened with Michael:

The court never told him what day to come back for the hearing, so when the day came and he didn't show, there was a warrant out for his arrest.
He was arrested yet again and spent a few more days in jail until they finally realized that they never told him his court date.
User avatar #128059 to #128005 - teoberry (04/17/2014) [-]
If you really have no means of smoking it, just do it with some buddies. If you don't want to ask that of them, just ask for a connect. I got my connect at my new school by just mentioning weed to a kid in homeroom. Once you have your guy, don't say anything like 'what can $x get me?', because he might rip you off. Tell your friend not to mention that you're new to it, and don't mention it yourself, because, while most dealers are trustworthy, once again, the guy might try to rip you off, and suck you in. Ask him to show you what he has. I don't feel like saving pictures, but a gram or two is not a whole lot. Good luck.
User avatar #128067 to #128059 - nommonsterbaa (04/17/2014) [-]
Thanks a ton man
User avatar #128017 to #128005 - ipostcp (04/16/2014) [-]
If you're just starting, go off and buy a few grams. That's more than enough for somebody just starting.
User avatar #128050 to #128017 - averagewhitekid (04/17/2014) [-]
Nigga one gram will probably be enough for a first timer
User avatar #128013 to #128005 - nativninja ONLINE (04/16/2014) [-]
Get a friend to do it with you. for weed is 10$ per gram and that all i know, as i don't drink or do anything 'worse' than weed.
User avatar #128016 to #128013 - nommonsterbaa (04/16/2014) [-]
Alright, thanks. If I could ask, why do I need a friend to do it with me? I mean it makes sense, but I'm slightly curious about specifics.
User avatar #128018 to #128016 - nativninja ONLINE (04/16/2014) [-]
It's funner, safer, and maybe they'll know what their doing, because from what i'm getting you don't. I only ever do it with friends.
User avatar #128021 to #128018 - nommonsterbaa (04/16/2014) [-]
Alright, thanks.
User avatar #128022 to #128021 - nativninja ONLINE (04/16/2014) [-]
Also, don't actually swallow the smoke. I did that for some retarded reason and threw up all over the place.
User avatar #128023 to #128022 - nommonsterbaa (04/16/2014) [-]
Didn't plan on it, or that that was even an idea. As far as smoking it, what I don't know is how to actually make a joint. Like what to use for it or whatever.
User avatar #128026 to #128023 - nativninja ONLINE (04/16/2014) [-]
Honestly, i've never made a join my self. depending on how much you want to spend by a pipe with a shotgun. get a friend to show you because a show is better that any explanation I can give.
User avatar #128027 to #128026 - nommonsterbaa (04/16/2014) [-]
Shit, now I either have to either get a pipe or learn to roll a join. Alright, thanks man
User avatar #128028 to #128027 - nativninja ONLINE (04/16/2014) [-]
Bongs work too. get one with a shotgun, a little hole that you takke your thumb off if the smoke gets to you.
User avatar #128012 to #128005 - qwertyjr (04/16/2014) [-]
Depends on where you live. Best way to get drugs, connections. Best way to find drugs? social events like parties, house raves, etc. How much? again, where you live determines the price. I used to be able to get a dime bag for like 5 though here in NY though.
User avatar #128014 to #128012 - nommonsterbaa (04/16/2014) [-]
A dime bag?
User avatar #128019 to #128014 - qwertyjr (04/16/2014) [-]
*nickel bag
User avatar #128020 to #128019 - nommonsterbaa (04/16/2014) [-]
Nickel bag? Like I don't get what you mean by that.
#128024 to #128020 - qwertyjr (04/16/2014) [-]
Fuck. Okay, Dime bag is 10 dollars, a dub is 20 dollars. The dime bags look like the picture I posted. Like what the others said, find a friend who has a connection and go with him. Get a couple grams. Do it with a friend. As far as alcohol find an older person to buy the alcohol for you.
User avatar #128025 to #128024 - nommonsterbaa (04/16/2014) [-]
Ah, alright then. Thanks for the explanation
#128004 - anonymous (04/16/2014) [-]
Guys, I'm in a bit of a dilemma here.
I recently started hanging out with an ex-girlfriend of mine (Since she started hanging out with my group of friends), and lately she's been touchy/feely with me- and she even allows me to be like that with her too. Now normally in my experiences with the female-mind, this would mean she likes me, but whenever the topic even is remotely brought-up, she reminds the person who said something that we're "Just friends".
Note that she doesn't allow anybody else to be like this with her, so that's why I need some help. I'm thinking of making a move when she comes over to my house to hang-out tomorrow, but I don't want to ruin anything in case she actually doesn't like me.
Help me, Funnyjunk, you're my only hope
User avatar #128007 to #128004 - qwertyjr (04/16/2014) [-]
Based on what information you told me, go for it bro. All signs point to rape treating her more than just a friend. But I have no other info. You may wanna reconsider why you broke up with her in the first place before you make a move. Also, why do you wanna make a move? Do you like her back? Do you want to re-start a relationship with her despite why you previously broke up? Up to you though. Be confident, straightforward, honest, and good luck.
#128003 - questionman (04/16/2014) [-]
can you guys help me with the dumb computer problem im like a super beta fag and i cant get rid of all these ads
User avatar #128080 to #128003 - xXThatxOnexGuyXx ONLINE (04/17/2014) [-]
What anti-virus do you have?

You probably have a trojan, bro.
User avatar #128029 to #128003 - hawaiianhappysauce (04/16/2014) [-]
It could also be adware. Go to control panel and add/remove programs and see if there is anything sketchy there. Also get adblock plus.
User avatar #128008 to #128003 - sasha ONLINE (04/16/2014) [-]
go to the top right hand corner of chrome
hit the 3 little bars
on the left hand side hit extensions
look for it
delete it
User avatar #128006 to #128003 - qwertyjr (04/16/2014) [-]
download adblock
User avatar #128000 - manofbeardliness (04/16/2014) [-]
Anyone know a good malware (and things of that nature) remover... That's also free
User avatar #128011 to #128000 - derpityhurr (04/16/2014) [-]
AVG or malwarebytes if its only malware
User avatar #128002 to #128000 - nigalthornberry (04/16/2014) [-]
Tech board would be better but I think malware bytes and spybot would work
User avatar #127974 - lagingerninja (04/16/2014) [-]
Right, I know most of you arent phsycology-watsits but I need some advice because the idea of it straight up scares me.

So short story; My girlfriend is worried that I have Bi-polar.

Long Story.
So for the last six months I started college, things were going great. Met the girl, getting the grades, moving up that social ladder from being an absolute beta in secondary. But lately my mood, personality, and general actions have been givng some worrying signs. For example;

-My appitite swings way too much, like from borderline disgusted by the notion of food to starving hyena in 30 minutes.
-My mood swings a lot as well. Much more than my girlfriend's and she's the hormonal one. I get irritable, ratty, moody and sullen, but snap back and forth a bit too quick.
-Sleeping pattern is off the rails. 2am, 4am, 11pm, 12am. I'm not sleeping in any set pattern now, and feel sluggish all the time.
-Time seem to be 'jolting' a little; losing track of time. It was a bit disconcerting when I couldnt remember absolutely anything from a day prior to thinking about it.
-Nails are destroyed from constant biting, grades are going down, little grimdark thoughts start popping into my head. I lose the effore to do anything, and gain no enjoyment from a lot others.

To make matters worse, both my brother and father have both been diagnosed with depression; my dads making him lose track of time, whilst my brother became aggresive, self-harming, and suicidal.

I just need some opinions and advice. I cant bring it up with my family as they allready have too much on their plate and would most likely tell me it's stress from college.
User avatar #128001 to #127974 - manofbeardliness (04/16/2014) [-]
I didn't major in it, but took psychology (and paid attention). Honestly, I had a similar experience during the semester I took the most/hardest courses of my college career. I'm not saying this is stemming completely from stress, but when you have a predisposition to things like depression, bipolar disorder, and things of the sort, stress delivers a heavier blow.

Stress is far more problematic than people make it out to be, it causes both psychological and biological problems. In the animal kingdom stress is a defense mechanism, and it used to be a useful one for humans but the problem is we don't use it to run away from predators anymore. Basically you're exerting copious amounts of adrenaline without being able to cut it off which later leads to both psychical and mental issues. Like I said, I'm no psychologist but I have mental illness in my family and I payed good attention in class.
#127989 to #127974 - ipostcp (04/16/2014) [-]
You could be trying to find a way to excuse yourself and your own actions. Or trying to justify yourself.
User avatar #127988 to #127974 - beatmasterz (04/16/2014) [-]
Congratulations! A boy or a girl?
User avatar #127984 to #127974 - thisismyhandle ONLINE (04/16/2014) [-]
It could be because you're a teenager.

If you are worried about it see a professional, and make sure you aren't going to somebody who will diagnose you with anything they can to sell you drugs. If you go see somebody about it, don't tell them what you think you have, just about your symptoms.

Bi-polar disorder is no joke, but it also seems to be a popular disorder for people to use to label themselves and others when they really don't know what they are talking about. You think you have a psych disorder? See a psychologist.
User avatar #127998 to #127984 - lagingerninja (04/16/2014) [-]
trust me, I wouldnt be self-labling if i could help it. Self-labeling is something I dont really agree with or like, as it can sometimes be used for an excuse for people who havent had something medically checked before the go saying that 'they have this, they have that'

I'm just a bit anxious because obviously depression is running in the family, and I'm just cautious.
User avatar #128034 to #127998 - thisismyhandle ONLINE (04/16/2014) [-]
My answer still stands. If you are truly worried about it, visit a good psychologist who is able to diagnose you with whatever you have (if you have anything).
User avatar #127978 to #127974 - gandaalf (04/16/2014) [-]
well i can relate to most of that
but that shouldn't be of any comfort because i have real fucking mental problems
imo that all seems kinda normal
except the nail biting
also if you're smoking or doing any drugs , then cut down a bit
User avatar #127980 to #127973 - gandaalf (04/16/2014) [-]
Kernkraft 400 (DJ Gius Remix) - Zombie Nation

you're welcome
User avatar #127982 to #127981 - gandaalf (04/16/2014) [-]
btw if you have a smartphone , get shazam
User avatar #127983 to #127982 - melkevegen (04/16/2014) [-]
oh damn i've been looking for that
thx man
#127970 - anonymous (04/16/2014) [-]
There's this hot, older MILF that lives about twenty minutes away from me. She's been over the house plenty of times, even before I was born. I really wanna do it with her. The problem is, she's my aunt. I feel she only sees me as a nephew, which is real fuckin' disheartening.

What do?
User avatar #128042 to #127970 - ScottP (04/17/2014) [-]
Break your arm in a skateboarding accident and get your arm placed in a cast
User avatar #127985 to #127970 - irishpunker (04/16/2014) [-]
Dude! What the fuck?

And why does this have me laughing so hard?
User avatar #127979 to #127970 - gandaalf (04/16/2014) [-]
>play spin the bottle then dare her to suck your dick as a joke
>when she's done tell her it wasn't a joke
>commence incestuous relations every night
User avatar #127962 - residentevilfan (04/16/2014) [-]
Best workout and diet to lose man tits
#127991 to #127962 - saltybanana (04/16/2014) [-]
alright alright i honestly telling you the truth here it may take a while probably months to loes it ive grown up with double d and im a dude
the best way its to grow some muscle there, try benching or bench pressing dumbells i think dumb bells work way better, and you get the split down the chest
diet wise id recommend not reusing those plastic water bottles, cause they relase somthing which i forgot what it was but makes you titties bigger
User avatar #127999 to #127991 - lagingerninja (04/16/2014) [-]
most plastic bottles slowly degrade over time; and they usually release some sort of toxin but in minute amounts. Never heard of them giving people titties though.
User avatar #128015 to #127999 - derpityhurr (04/16/2014) [-]
They release some kinda chemical that promotes feminine growth or something like that
User avatar #128192 to #128015 - misticalz ONLINE (04/17/2014) [-]
#127964 to #127962 - usarmyexplain (04/16/2014) [-]
Eat less, exercise more, do push ups, drink water.

Cardio burns fat, push ups build muscle under the man tits shaping them like pecs. Mix in sets of 20 incline and decline push ups to build the top and bottom of your pecs.

The wider you have your arms spaced the more work your pecs will have to do to actually move your body. If you cant do man push ups right away, start from your knees.

Once you can do 20 push ups, do 20 more after a 1 or 2 minute rest, keep adding sets as you get stronger till you are doing 5 sets a day. Then start reducing your rest between sets till you have fewer sets with more push ups or increase your pace so the sets are shorter lengths of time, or do both...
User avatar #127969 to #127965 - usarmyexplain (04/16/2014) [-]
Progress can be slow, so set short term goals, like if you have to pause during sets work on going longer without pausing.
#127960 - anonymous (04/16/2014) [-]
anyone have that attack on titan pic of that ass in thights and it's captioned "titans"?
User avatar #127954 - unforgivenfive (04/16/2014) [-]
MY FUCKING TOOTH HURTS LIKE THE DICKENS AND ITS 5 IN THE MORNING. I've taken 2 ibuprofen and FUCK. its like chinese water droplet torture...seizure of constant pain in one area
User avatar #127955 to #127954 - loveyameanish (04/16/2014) [-]
User avatar #127956 to #127955 - unforgivenfive (04/16/2014) [-]
cant...first im 18 in us...(dont really care bout that) but the only whisky in the house is in a room next to 4 very loud dogs..who if they heard me would surely woke up...it was passover tonight so I had four cups of wine...but that was hours ago. thankyou though ill definitly use that later today when the sun is out
#127949 - anonymous (04/16/2014) [-]
Hey guys I know this is probably not the best place to ask but here's the deal: I've been dating this guy for about a year and he often buys my kids presents and helps out with some expenses (like taking them to the doctor) so I was wondering if I can sue him for child support? We aren't married or living together but I'm about to break up with him (he has money but he's soooo boring) and I don't want my kids to miss their gifts and lifestyle.
User avatar #127957 to #127949 - gandaalf (04/16/2014) [-]
better yet
straight up steal the money
User avatar #127952 to #127949 - iridium (04/16/2014) [-]
You again, huh? Been awhile. not long enough
User avatar #127950 to #127949 - ipostcp (04/16/2014) [-]
Yeah do it.
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