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Latest users (3): dehumanizer, sugoi, xXThatxOnexGuyXx, anonymous(22).
What do you think? Give us your opinion. Anonymous comments allowed.
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#135448 - minutes has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #135438 - vortexrain (05/26/2014) [-]
There are some incredibly gorgeous girls that I work with, and they are very faptastic, but I respect them too much to actually fap to them. The thing is, I think about more and more everyday. I need some advice.
User avatar #135440 to #135438 - awesomerninjathing (05/26/2014) [-]
stop being a beta faggot and go actually have sex with one of them
#135443 to #135440 - vortexrain (05/26/2014) [-]
This is me, you think that would actually happen?
User avatar #135571 to #135443 - alecbaldwinning (05/27/2014) [-]
It doesn't matter how ugly you are.

Women respond to confidence and humor. Be fucking funny, and be a fucking man, and you will fuck chicks.
User avatar #135445 to #135443 - awesomerninjathing (05/26/2014) [-]
it can if you do something about it

stop being a charlie faggot and work out
User avatar #135447 to #135445 - vortexrain (05/26/2014) [-]
When I have time to work out, I don't have money, and when I have money, I don't have the time.
#135449 to #135447 - minutes (05/26/2014) [-]
That's a lame ass excuse. If you have 1 hour free time a day you can loose weight and get in shape. There are plenty of exercises you can do at home and you don't need money for them either. Hell if you buy some weights and a set of dumbbels you would be completely fine for the beginning.
User avatar #135446 to #135444 - vortexrain (05/26/2014) [-]
I can't tell if if you're laughing at my appearance, or my comment.
#135439 to #135438 - minutes (05/26/2014) [-]
There is absolutely nothing wrong with fapping to girls you know. You could also just talk to them and actually try to get one if you like them that much.
User avatar #135441 to #135439 - vortexrain (05/26/2014) [-]
Four of them are dating someone, and the other one is talking about getting back with her ex. I actually tried asking her out, but she work two of the three days I was off, and she was going to a funeral the other day.
#135442 to #135441 - minutes (05/26/2014) [-]
Bad timing can happen. I wouldn't give up already.
User avatar #135414 - muffinzexe (05/26/2014) [-]
Is there any place where I can read comic online?
User avatar #135437 to #135414 - marinepenguin (05/26/2014) [-]
The internet is a good place to start.
#135408 - anonymous (05/26/2014) [-]
So people have killed themselves for less than what im dealing with, there is absolutely no point in me carrying on. I've tried for years to improve on everything thats gone wrong and not one thing has worked out or even improved for me. Its just got worse than absolute rock bottom.

The thing is is that i know i dont have it in me to kill myself, but i know there isnt any point in me staying alive, i have nothing...
User avatar #135582 to #135408 - tombobbusama (05/27/2014) [-]
Hey anon. I dont know if this'll help you, or even be relevant, but I have a plan in case I ever become suicidal.
I have a bunch of money (not a lot) saved up in case this happens. But my plan is to just leave the house and walk. And not stop.
Just go and explore the world. See how far you can get before you run out of money. My plan, personally, is to see if I can walk to Scotland (I live just out of London).

Because if I would kill myself anyway, then there'd be no difference to me whether I kill myself here or in Scotland. But maybe along the way, I might find a bit of beauty in the world that makes it worth living.
#135434 to #135408 - minutes (05/26/2014) [-]
Where do you live mate? If you live anywhere close to me i would gladly spent time with you.
User avatar #135421 to #135408 - Nameloc (05/26/2014) [-]
You have everything to live for.

Everything.

What's stopping you from becoming the person you want to be?

Go out and do something meaningful with your life.
It could be as simple as giving some money to a homeless person, adopting a dog that's on the hit list because the shelter can't afford to keep it anymore, joining the Big Brother/ Big Sister program to help make a difference in someone else' life, etc.

Just because your life sucks, doesn't mean you can't make life better for others by helping them out.
#135428 to #135421 - anonymous (05/26/2014) [-]
All my "friends" were anti social twats who cant be bothered to do anything or talk to me, so for the past 2 years i've had no one to talk to. I've never had a girl friend and rarely even found myself in the opportunity to even meet any. And now im in a fucking hateful job with long hours, i feel as if im spending every waking second there and i havent been able to find anything else. All i do is work and breifly go home.
I wish i could get a dog but i cant where i live. I wanted to do volunteer work at animal charities but none or local...

And its been like this for over 2 years of desperately trying to get out of it.
#135473 to #135428 - anonymous (05/27/2014) [-]
A least you have a job, your own home, and don't need to rely on others for survival. Shut the fuck up. From the information given, you don't have a single good reason for wanting to kill yourself.
User avatar #135432 to #135428 - Nameloc (05/26/2014) [-]
It sounds like you need a change.

Move.
Fuck everything and just move somewhere else.

If you don't have the money, then work your ass off with the end goal of being able to move from that place and find a new place to call home.
Do what makes you happy. If working the same boring job isn't good enough, then save up money and quit.

I guarantee you, moving to a new area with different job opportunities and new people will make everything much better. Even if you have to get a restaurant job; You could probably pick up 3 part time jobs to replace the single job you have now.
#135409 to #135408 - youregaylol (05/26/2014) [-]
Boohoo, there are amputees who whine less than you dude.
#135425 to #135409 - anonymous (05/26/2014) [-]
Well good for, them ,wish i was as happy as them.
User avatar #135403 - Nameloc (05/26/2014) [-]
Any tips for prank phone calling someone?

Aside from the free California number Google Voice gives you...
I'm running out of options if he knows the same number.

Why am I prank calling?
Fucker has called me non-stop for the past two days; I already told him he has the wrong number, and he keeps calling to ramble off random shit.
So, now I'm freaking him out.
User avatar #135555 to #135403 - ImsoObvious (05/27/2014) [-]
prankowl.com has good automated phone call pranks
#135400 - anonymous (05/26/2014) [-]
Setting up profiles for online dating when i realised i fucking hate how i look, not the way i dress or sharpen up, just my physical face repulses me so fucking badly...
Any help?
Its making me depressed looking at this ugly cunt.
User avatar #135416 to #135400 - marinepenguin (05/26/2014) [-]
You find yourself more unattractive then you really are. You focus and exaggerate flaws that other people don't notice.
#135410 to #135400 - youregaylol (05/26/2014) [-]
Put the focus on your tits if youre a chick, or put the focus on your abdominals if youre a dude, simple.
User avatar #135401 to #135400 - nigalthornberry (05/26/2014) [-]
Angle the Camera
User avatar #135398 - erikus (05/26/2014) [-]
How do I deal with jealousy?

I'm a jealous guy myself but my current gf gives me fuckin' reasons. His best friend is his ex who has been with her the last 4 years, other best friend of her has already tried to make out with her several times.

She says she's not interested in them and I trust her but still I feel pretty unconfortable with the situation. I already talked with her about this and I understand I just can't ask her to kick them out of her life but I can't help but feel this way. What do?
User avatar #135547 to #135398 - solareyes (05/27/2014) [-]
One of my friends just got out of a 2 1/2 year relationship where he had been warning her for the past year on one of her guy friends that he was way into her. She denied any of that going on. When they broke up, she went straight to the guy friend. She's the one that ended it.

So you need to address this on your own terms. Tell her that you're not afraid of competition, but at the same time you are not ok with the fact that she's getting herself into situations where some shit will go down. You do have every right to break up with her if she doesn't want to agree to you being around every time she's hanging out with them or something like that. She needs to know you are NOT okay with this, period.
User avatar #135419 to #135398 - marinepenguin (05/26/2014) [-]
If she isn't willing to let go of people like that, then she likes the attention that they bring her and that's not the kind of person you can have a healthy relationship with, if I were you I'd break it off. You could give her an ultimatum, them or you.
User avatar #135423 to #135419 - erikus (05/26/2014) [-]
Do you really think I have the right to do that? I though that would be selfish... (this is an honest question, call me moralfag but damn...)

I mean they might be her real friends all along and maybe I'm behaving like a little bitch, but to me it seems weird that people that had a relationship can be friends after that.

Anyway thank you
User avatar #135424 to #135423 - marinepenguin (05/26/2014) [-]
It is a pretty extreme reaction, but if she is being friends with guys who:
1. She has a past with, a long past especially
2. Makes moves on her sometimes, knowing that she's with you

And on top of those she knows that it bothers the hell out of you (which it rightfully should, it's not making you be a bitch) and continues to be around them, she doesn't care for your feelings as much as she should. If the situation was flipped and you had an ex or a few girls trying to get with you and she hated it and asked you to not be around them, what would you do? I'd respect her feelings and not be with those people. In the end it's your decision.
User avatar #135429 to #135424 - erikus (05/26/2014) [-]
... Yeah, you're right. I mean your point of view makes pretty much a lot of sense. I'll try to approach the situation like this. Thank you a lot.
User avatar #135399 to #135398 - gandaalf (05/26/2014) [-]
dump her
i'm not even joking
you don't need negative shit in your peripherals
cut her off
if it annoys you to the point you have to ask advice on it
then it's some negative shit
and she doesn't want to stop
fuck no man
smash a cake in her face then dump her
User avatar #135396 - harbingerwolf (05/26/2014) [-]
How can i start making animation like this?

Game Groomps Fanimated- "WHAT IS MY LIFE"

Im gonna make a gaming channel ( relax i know there's shit tonnes out there, its just a for fun project ) where the let's plays have small animations throughout the whole video. In a sense the gamers will kinda be represent like the Gorrillaz via cartoon characters, the animations will be certain bits of dialouge or scenes that happen in the playthrough.

I have no idea how to animate or anything about it, but im just starting my research into it, any help would be appreciated.
#135405 to #135396 - Nameloc (05/26/2014) [-]
Animating is tedious fun.   
The goal is something great to achieve; The ladder getting there is a rough course.   
   
No one likes climbing that ladder to a finished animation.   
Pic related; It's a very old Pivot I made. You can see when I started to become better at animating mid-way through.  After the second laser beam.    
   
That tiny animation took hours of work across a few days.   
   
When you're creating an animation, you do things frame by frame. Each second of an animation has (normally) 30 frames. So for each frame, you're moving/ redrawing characters to move ever so slightly, and then you start on the next frame, where they move ever so slightly again.   
   
Another concept you need to grasp when animating is Smoothing.   
The slower an item is moving in real time, the smaller adjustments you make per frame. The faster an item is moving in real time, the larger adjustments you make per frame.   
So if you're moving Arm from A to G, if the Arm is moving slowly, you'd animate it as:   
   
Arm in position A, Arm in position B, Arm in position C, Arm in position D, Arm in position E, Arm in position F, Arm in position G.   
   
If the Arm were moving fast, you'd animate it as:   
Arm in position A, Arm in position D, Arm in position G.   
   
Anyhow, the animation you linked to was made in Flash.   
www.adobe.com/products/flash.html   
   
There's a few other animation tools out there, but Flash is by far the most popular one. You could, however, make an animation with simply just Paint/ any drawing program. Then in the video editor you have, drop the frames into place and have them stay for 1/30th of a second or so. The downside to this is that you're doing each frame without a ghost of the previous frame behind it.
Animating is tedious fun.
The goal is something great to achieve; The ladder getting there is a rough course.

No one likes climbing that ladder to a finished animation.
Pic related; It's a very old Pivot I made. You can see when I started to become better at animating mid-way through. After the second laser beam.

That tiny animation took hours of work across a few days.

When you're creating an animation, you do things frame by frame. Each second of an animation has (normally) 30 frames. So for each frame, you're moving/ redrawing characters to move ever so slightly, and then you start on the next frame, where they move ever so slightly again.

Another concept you need to grasp when animating is Smoothing.
The slower an item is moving in real time, the smaller adjustments you make per frame. The faster an item is moving in real time, the larger adjustments you make per frame.
So if you're moving Arm from A to G, if the Arm is moving slowly, you'd animate it as:

Arm in position A, Arm in position B, Arm in position C, Arm in position D, Arm in position E, Arm in position F, Arm in position G.

If the Arm were moving fast, you'd animate it as:
Arm in position A, Arm in position D, Arm in position G.

Anyhow, the animation you linked to was made in Flash.
www.adobe.com/products/flash.html

There's a few other animation tools out there, but Flash is by far the most popular one. You could, however, make an animation with simply just Paint/ any drawing program. Then in the video editor you have, drop the frames into place and have them stay for 1/30th of a second or so. The downside to this is that you're doing each frame without a ghost of the previous frame behind it.
User avatar #135412 to #135405 - harbingerwolf (05/26/2014) [-]
BTW, that adobe proffessional CC, what is it? A singular program or all of them?
Getting mixed answers on google.
User avatar #135413 to #135412 - Nameloc (05/26/2014) [-]
Here's a list of all of the Adobe packages:

www.adobe.com/products/creativecloud/buying-guide.html

The first one, for $49 a month, includes all Adobe programs.
Alternatively there's the $19.99 a month, that allows use for a single program of your choosing. Which can be Flash.

Just note that Adobe's support is piss poor.
I once spent 19+ hours in support for something a YouTube comment helped me remedy.
User avatar #135415 to #135413 - harbingerwolf (05/26/2014) [-]
Holy crap thats a lot better than i thought. I dont think i've ever needed to buy a program before but i noticed software in stores which were hundreds of pounds for a program which turned me off.
Could do with photoshop aswell.
I'll give the free trial ago.
User avatar #135417 to #135415 - Nameloc (05/26/2014) [-]
Definitely.
Just note that the Monthly packages include a 1 year commitment, and canceling out means you pay 50% of the remaining payments. (After the first month, that is.)

Personally, I would totally own the $49.99/ month package, but I'm too uncertain about my financial future to go through with such payments.
User avatar #135420 to #135417 - harbingerwolf (05/26/2014) [-]
Ahhh, yeah i guess thats why those in store packages cost hundreds, i assumed it was for one program in my noobishness
And that shouldnt be a problem if i do decide to subscribe fortunate (the only benefit of the job im in at the mo -_-).
Any tips for my actual idea?
#135430 to #135420 - Nameloc (05/26/2014) [-]
Sorry for not giving many tips on Animating.   
It's all dead simple.   
   
Start with character in position A, slowly move specified parts until character is in position B, etc.   
   
Gif related, it's one of my 'best' pivot animations.   
   
Just try to work on smoothing. That's the only real thing you'll have trouble with.   
It will take tens of frames to make something decent. You'll get better with time.   
And Lip-Syncing animations is pretty tough; People normally create templates of character mouths in certain positions sounding out different vowels/ consonants and different combinations and just apply the templates to different frames.   
   
If anything, you could try using Pivot for a while and see what you can make.   
Pivot is easy since each item in it is an entity, and instead of re-drawing everything each frame, you move the entities around.
Sorry for not giving many tips on Animating.
It's all dead simple.

Start with character in position A, slowly move specified parts until character is in position B, etc.

Gif related, it's one of my 'best' pivot animations.

Just try to work on smoothing. That's the only real thing you'll have trouble with.
It will take tens of frames to make something decent. You'll get better with time.
And Lip-Syncing animations is pretty tough; People normally create templates of character mouths in certain positions sounding out different vowels/ consonants and different combinations and just apply the templates to different frames.

If anything, you could try using Pivot for a while and see what you can make.
Pivot is easy since each item in it is an entity, and instead of re-drawing everything each frame, you move the entities around.
User avatar #135427 to #135420 - Nameloc (05/26/2014) [-]
Heh, the in-store packages have the combined cost of the monthly payments.

Not sure what you mean in "if you do decide to subscribe fortunate."

As far as tips go:

Quality over Quantity -- Even if it means pouring 2+ weeks of time into a video. Don't release the video if it isn't 100% perfect.

Do something Different -- If people wanted to watch something like what Markiplier does or something that PewDiePie does, they'd go and watch Markiplied/ PewDiePie.

Short and Sweet and to the point -- No intro longer than 3 seconds; No build up longer than 40 seconds to get to the main content. IE, if you're trying to show a glitch in a video game, just show the few seconds before the glitch and during the glitch. No one will wait 40 seconds for a 2 second glitch.

Quick. Everything in the video Must be Quick -- Same as the one above, but more direct. Example: www.youtube.com/user/CGPGrey

Aaand animating:
Don't be afraid to backtrack and re-work previous frames
Always remember that there will be multiple things going on in any given scene, try not to focus too hard on animating one thing when there's other things to animate in the scene. Hence the "Don't be afraid to backtrack and re-work previous frames" -- Even if you forget to animate a character, you can ALWAYS go back and animate him.
Something must always be moving; Capturing the attention of YouTube is like capturing the attention of a child. Something is always moving on kid's TV shows. Never is the scene still. Even TV shows like Archer do this, although they shift camera angles to compensate for the lack of character animations on the bodies.

When I think of more, I'll post them here
User avatar #135431 to #135427 - harbingerwolf (05/26/2014) [-]
Those are some brilliant helpful tips thanks
And yeah im hoping it will be something different, and im doing it for fun so im not too fussed about beating other Lets Players.
User avatar #135407 to #135405 - harbingerwolf (05/26/2014) [-]
Thanks a lot for the advice, nice animation btw
Yeah i expected it to be hard work, i just hope i have what it takes to stick throught it because i love it so much and i really need it for this project of mine.
Thanks for the help again.
#135394 - brownskin (05/26/2014) [-]
The closest I've come to making OC is recasting big films and series as horribly as possible through the wonders of photoshop. I did some marvel films earlier and reception was good enough for me to go again. Any recommendations for what I can recast? As long as it is well known I'll try. Thanks for any suggestions and let's keep it all rational, please. Pic related, one of the recastings
User avatar #135384 - schnizel (05/26/2014) [-]
What is this meme called?
User avatar #135397 to #135393 - schnizel (05/26/2014) [-]
Thanks.
User avatar #135378 - revengeforfreeze (05/26/2014) [-]
Should I buy malwarebytes?
User avatar #135406 to #135378 - Nameloc (05/26/2014) [-]
You could if you don't have a program such as Avast monitoring in real time.
User avatar #135385 to #135383 - revengeforfreeze (05/26/2014) [-]
cons and pros?
#135386 to #135385 - schnizel (05/26/2014) [-]
bitches and tits, do you know how the meme is called?
User avatar #135389 to #135386 - revengeforfreeze (05/26/2014) [-]
if you're not still mad, I'd like to talk to you on skype
I promise that I won't invite anyone else. I promise this one, and if I don't keep the promise, you are free to block me and never interact with me again. deal?

also, I searched but I only got the same picture so I'm not sure.
#135411 to #135389 - youregaylol (05/26/2014) [-]
You heard it here first advice board, revengeforfreeze x schnizel is a thing
User avatar #135390 to #135389 - schnizel (05/26/2014) [-]
Ok, I'll talk after friday, I've got a shitton of work to do and I haven't even started.
User avatar #135387 to #135386 - revengeforfreeze (05/26/2014) [-]
lol
actually no i don't. let me try reverse image searching..
#135373 - anonymous (05/26/2014) [-]
Think i might be bi but dont want to be.
I dont find guys attractive romantically i just think some of the sex is hawt, to the point where some times' i've desensitized myself to straight porn and have to think of something gay to finish sometimes. its really fucking annoyin, Aside from just blanking myself from porn and starting again on just straight what can i do?
User avatar #135380 to #135373 - thumbsdenied (05/26/2014) [-]
be bi if yer bi
#135368 - ipostcp (05/26/2014) [-]
How do you stop the itch after shaving the down stairs?
User avatar #135548 to #135368 - solareyes (05/27/2014) [-]
Get some sort of after shave gel or something. There's something called "Bikini Zone" that helps prevent rashes and bumps n shit after shaving, I'm pretty sure it works for guys unless you're a girl, then GO GET IT
User avatar #135481 to #135368 - alexanderburns (05/27/2014) [-]
Heal that irritation with moisturizing lotion.
I've heard your skin can tolerate the shaving after doing it a few times. I've only shaved twice, but I'm planning on keeping it up (only the side/leg parts -- trimming all else) so I'll let you know if that aint bull.
User avatar #135379 to #135368 - revengeforfreeze (05/26/2014) [-]
why does it only itch when you shave on the first floor of your house?
go to the cellar or attic?
User avatar #135372 to #135368 - makotoitou (05/26/2014) [-]
don't shave
#135374 to #135372 - ipostcp (05/26/2014) [-]
I generally trim but I felt like doing something different.
User avatar #135375 to #135374 - makotoitou (05/26/2014) [-]
nice, now post pics
User avatar #135381 to #135376 - revengeforfreeze (05/26/2014) [-]
you could post pics on gayboard
#135369 to #135368 - minutes (05/26/2014) [-]
Hit yourself in the face, the itching will mysteriously disappear. trust me i am an expert
#135370 to #135369 - ipostcp (05/26/2014) [-]
It was so nice and free before the itch happened.
It was so nice and free before the itch happened.
User avatar #135371 to #135370 - ipostcp (05/26/2014) [-]
Although the balls sweat to much. Especially during summer heat that can get annoying. I shouldn't of done it.
0
#135343 - CookieKing has deleted their comment [-]
#135337 - CookieKing ONLINE (05/26/2014) [-]
Whenever i find out a girl is interested in me i act like a total asshole. I'm like the nicest dude before i meet her, while i get to know her and even when i'm close with her. but then i find out she's interested and i'm a completely different person. What the hell is wrong with me?
#135367 to #135337 - zionistjew (05/26/2014) [-]
what isn't wrong with you?
User avatar #135344 to #135337 - Nameloc (05/26/2014) [-]
Try to pretend as if they're male friend when you're near them.
Makes things a lot easier.
User avatar #135426 to #135344 - awesomerninjathing (05/26/2014) [-]
MA NIGGA CHECK OUT THE ASS ON THAT BITCH FUUUUCK LMAO
#135433 to #135426 - Nameloc (05/26/2014) [-]
#1 way to get girls, right there.
#1 way to get girls, right there.
User avatar #135435 to #135433 - awesomerninjathing (05/26/2014) [-]
yeah but that's the thing
pretend she's a male friend, sure, but she's not a male friend, so don't talk about the same shit you'd say to your male friends
User avatar #135436 to #135435 - Nameloc (05/26/2014) [-]
Yeah but the concept is there just to make things simple enough to be yourself around them.

Especially since he's making himself nervous and ends up going all douchey.
User avatar #135359 to #135344 - savmg (05/26/2014) [-]
What about falling in the fucking friend zone? It's not just for people in fedoras
User avatar #135402 to #135359 - Nameloc (05/26/2014) [-]
Pretending they are a friend will make things easier and more comfortable when CookieKing makes the move.

It won't make him become an asshole, it'll allow him to become who he is infront of her; And from there, he makes ze move.
User avatar #135622 to #135402 - savmg (05/27/2014) [-]
Yeah but that's perfect friend zone example. The longer you wait the harder it gets to make a move. Life is strange...
#135360 to #135359 - CookieKing ONLINE (05/26/2014) [-]
Is it weird that i felt happy someone thought i wasn't a fedora wearing faggot?
User avatar #135623 to #135360 - savmg (05/27/2014) [-]
Lol you don't sound like one is all. There's a diffrence to wingeing about the friend zone and talking about it. You didn't winge
#135635 to #135623 - CookieKing ONLINE (05/27/2014) [-]
Haha yeah. Actually i'm starting to think that's part of the problem. I'm so comfortable just being a friend, any signs of a relationship scares me and being an asshole is how i cope with it. Of course being an asshole i don't even get to stay in the friendzone.

I'm just ranting now.
User avatar #135650 to #135635 - savmg (05/28/2014) [-]
All good we all need a rant at times.
#135418 to #135360 - youregaylol (05/26/2014) [-]
Does that mean people think you're a fedora wearing faggot all the time?
User avatar #135342 to #135337 - hawaiianhappysauce (05/26/2014) [-]
I think you are playing good game. Women like assholes. So keep doing it.
User avatar #135346 to #135342 - hawaiianhappysauce (05/26/2014) [-]
Lol womanexplain is angry about me telling the truth.
User avatar #135362 to #135361 - hawaiianhappysauce (05/26/2014) [-]
Stop being fat and accept the truth.
#135364 to #135362 - womanexplain (05/26/2014) [-]
If calling others names makes you feel better, let it all out.
If calling others names makes you feel better, let it all out.
User avatar #135340 to #135337 - thatnigger (05/26/2014) [-]
Does it come off to you as a surprise when someone likes you? If so you're probably too tense, relax and just be you...
#135329 - thenameschuck (05/26/2014) [-]
How do I be an alpha lord like him?
<
User avatar #135377 to #135329 - harbingerwolf (05/26/2014) [-]
He looks like he's doing a Tony Stark pose, "Is it better to be feared, or rejected?"
User avatar #135363 to #135329 - hawaiianhappysauce (05/26/2014) [-]
I forgot, you apparently need to be autistic too.
User avatar #135356 to #135329 - Rei (05/26/2014) [-]
Cut off your dick
User avatar #135332 to #135329 - hawaiianhappysauce (05/26/2014) [-]
Go to nearest campus
Bring knife and guns (if available)
find any bimbo and kill them
kill yourself
have females on twitter say you are hot because twitter people are fucking stupid.
User avatar #135333 to #135332 - thenameschuck (05/26/2014) [-]
Nice and solid plan but I think its missing a few steps, needs more ??? and profit. But again its solid.
User avatar #135334 to #135333 - hawaiianhappysauce (05/26/2014) [-]
The whole profit thing is old.

Also OPTIONAL

rape the corpses so you don't die a virgin.
set a trap in your appt for the cops to trigger when they investigate
Blow up a building
Bring a Quaran so the media will think this was Home Grown Terrorism
And finally, leave a note saying there are more people out there who are going to kill people.
User avatar #135335 to #135334 - thenameschuck (05/26/2014) [-]
Wait, why do I an suicide in the name of Muhammad so I get alot of virgins? I may die a virgin but I get to fuck other virgins. And what if I shoot up the new godzilla movie? OH and before I go I will leave fake notes falsly linking my self to people in the middle east so they think I am working with Al Qaeda?
User avatar #135338 to #135335 - hawaiianhappysauce (05/26/2014) [-]
Yes. Fox news loves to link shootings to terrorism since it gives good ratings and it makes people afraid. Thus your message gets across
User avatar #135339 to #135338 - thenameschuck (05/26/2014) [-]
Thanks man I appreciate your help.
User avatar #135341 to #135339 - hawaiianhappysauce (05/26/2014) [-]
If you have aspergers too that could also be used to get sympathy.
Also, try to use assault weapons so the NRA gets anally raped by the liberal idiots.

Or if you can't kill yourself, hide in a boat. This will lock down the town and put everyone in a state of fear.
User avatar #135321 - steezyman (05/26/2014) [-]
My girlfriend missed her period, I'm pretty sure shes not pregnant but i'm paranoid. The condom didn't break and i'm pretty sure shes late due to stress but i'm scared. Comfort me plz.
User avatar #135550 to #135321 - solareyes (05/27/2014) [-]
Get a pee stick. Is she on the pill?
#135629 to #135550 - steezyman (05/27/2014) [-]
She had her period today! Thank God. Just felt like i needed to tell someone but didnt want to embarrass her.
She had her period today! Thank God. Just felt like i needed to tell someone but didnt want to embarrass her.
User avatar #135630 to #135629 - solareyes (05/27/2014) [-]
Hey man if you weren't gonna be around for the child and y'all weren't ready, be happy. I'm glad for y'all, those are the worst kinds of scares but seriously she should consider being on the pill if she isn't or some other form of birth control cuz condoms aren't the most effective
User avatar #135631 to #135630 - steezyman (05/27/2014) [-]
That the first time i climaxed but from now on its spermicidal condoms and pulling out.
User avatar #135632 to #135631 - solareyes (05/27/2014) [-]
I'm a little worried about that, but whatever floats your boat!
User avatar #135357 to #135321 - hawaiianhappysauce (05/26/2014) [-]
Maybe your girlfriend got her pussy pounded by a real man a gut with a bigger cock and he went in deep and blew his load into her womb and now you have to father his child, because she is just going to tell you your the father.
User avatar #135422 to #135357 - marinepenguin (05/26/2014) [-]
Rood wen no need 2 b rood
User avatar #135336 to #135321 - pigglysumbeech (05/26/2014) [-]
Been through this a million times.

Don't worry about it. Seriously. It'll happen many more times in your future and you'll come out of the situation, every time, feeling dumb.

You're okay.
#135326 to #135321 - anonymous (05/26/2014) [-]
Get a pregnancy test.
#135324 to #135321 - anonymous (05/26/2014) [-]
she cheated on you
#135365 to #135324 - zionistjew (05/26/2014) [-]
i can confirm im the guy she cheated with
User avatar #135322 to #135321 - wolfofwallstreet (05/26/2014) [-]
Not an issue. Just raise a kid!
Another person to sesh with
User avatar #135331 to #135322 - hawaiianhappysauce (05/26/2014) [-]
That movie is gay.
User avatar #135382 to #135331 - revengeforfreeze (05/26/2014) [-]
You know I obliterate gay.
#135316 - anonymous (05/26/2014) [-]
One time I got high while it was me and my mom alone in the house. It was 1:30 am so I assumed she was sleeping. I didnt want to wake her up when I went to the fridge(It was right next to her room). I heard a vibrating sound coming from her room and got horny. I recorded her masturbating and now she knows. What should I do? This is a serious question, also.
User avatar #135317 to #135316 - tikitaco (05/26/2014) [-]
Confront her about it. I would also recommend deleting the recording. No point in lying or coming up with some scheme since she already knows.
#135318 to #135317 - anonymous (05/26/2014) [-]
I've already confronted her. She doesn't want to talk to me anymore but she promised she wouldn't tell anybody about it.
User avatar #135319 to #135318 - tikitaco (05/26/2014) [-]
Time heals all, friend.
#135327 to #135319 - youregaylol (05/26/2014) [-]
shit dude we're talking about a kid whose mom found out hes been taping her fingering herself I don't think father time wants to touch that crap that kid is screwed.
User avatar #135492 to #135327 - tikitaco (05/27/2014) [-]
His only option is to give her some space and time. Sure he's in a pickle, but that doesn't mean a couple years won't help.
#135493 to #135492 - youregaylol (05/27/2014) [-]
I'm pretty sure the son/mother relationship is fucked beyond repair at this point.
#135307 - anonymous (05/26/2014) [-]
girl im interested in recently broke up with her boyfriend. we're really tight together and i've always had a thing for her. how do i come onto her now that she's available?
User avatar #135551 to #135307 - solareyes (05/27/2014) [-]
Wait first. Don't come on to her yet, now's not the time.
#135366 to #135307 - zionistjew (05/26/2014) [-]
she already sucking tons of nigger cock right now son give up already
User avatar #135309 to #135307 - interglutealcleft (05/26/2014) [-]
Dude give her some time, wait it out for a month or two and then strike
User avatar #135294 - vampyrate (05/26/2014) [-]
I am trying to find an old friend of my husband's and I am having a terrible time. How can I go about finding a current phone number for a name and address? I know where they live now, and have names, but the most recent phone numbers listed on the site I am trying to use are out of date. Is there a way to do this?
User avatar #135310 to #135308 - vampyrate (05/26/2014) [-]
Thanks. I don't have 20 bucks tho
#135312 to #135310 - tiredofannon (05/26/2014) [-]
Nevermind; turns out there is a paywall after several bullshit "searching" screens.

Sorry about that. If you have the address could you mail them asking you to call them?
User avatar #135313 to #135312 - vampyrate (05/26/2014) [-]
I went with the week trial for a dollar. worth it if it makes husband happy
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#135311 to #135310 - tiredofannon has deleted their comment [-]
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