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User avatar #232 - PkBoolet (04/25/2012) [+] (1 reply)
DIRECTIONS TO CAUSE A CATASTROPHE

1. Go to beach
2. Dig two holes in wet sand, 1 ft. deep, width is negligible,
but they must be 1 ft. apart from each other
3. dig a tunnel under the top layer of sand, connecting the two holes.
fill holes back up with sand, but make sure the tunnel stays intact.
4. Shoot up the hotel you're staying at
#127 - sopsop (04/25/2012) [+] (1 reply)
>reading all these comments
>mfw when I realize they can all be summed up as "I shat"

#47 - sizabledoor (04/25/2012) [-]
>7th grade
> In mass
> Have to fart
>try to make it silent but ass erupts giant fart
> everyone hears it including priest
> MFW i smelt what i had delt
#138 - nativninja (04/25/2012) [+] (1 reply)
>in class
>stretching
>smack girl behind me
>in suprise yell " **** "
>get suspended for hitting a girl and swearing
>mfw
User avatar #119 - misterklass (04/25/2012) [-]
>Be buying new car
>Find an awesome BMW at the dealership
>Take it for a test drive
>Need to ****
>Hurry back
>Flashing blue lights in rear view mirror
> ************
>Panic and **** my pants
>Proceed to pull over
>Cop Approaches the car
>roll down window
>Officer smells ****
>NOPE.jpg
> ******** .jpg
>Go back to dealership
>"i don't like it"
>Leave in a hurry and never return.
User avatar #123 - misterklass (04/25/2012) [-]
This one's true.

>Be in7th grade
>Recess, Be outside chilling
>Bell rings, Proceed to go inside
>Decide to fart before going in so people wont have to smell it.
>Shart.
> ************
>run to bathroom
>Need to get **** out of underwear
>No toilet paper
> **** it, use hand.
>Get most of the **** out of the underwear
>Go to wash my hands
> **** no soap
>Decide to smear it on the mirror..noone will ever know it was me
>Someone walks into bathroom
>Sees my smearing **** on mirror
>He runs to the principles office and tells on me
>Sit in principles office smelling like **** with my parents for 2 hours trying to explain why i vandalized the bathroom with **** .
+22
#2 - crowcane **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
#104 - theangryrussian (04/25/2012) [+] (5 replies)
>out camping
>eat some hallucinative berries
>take pants off to fight invisible slenderman
>run around without pants on like a total maniac
>end up curled up in a tree whispering to myself, "i like chicken balls, I like chicken balls"
>mfw my friend caught the whole thing on video
#99 - youlosethegame (04/25/2012) [-]
>derpin on the interwebs
>felling bored
>find website
>lol this is pretty funny
>trapped forever
#124 - ltpraptor (04/25/2012) [+] (1 reply)
>be me, 4 years old   
>at the carnival   
>dad has to pee really bad   
>dad takes me to porto-potty   
>dad starts peeing in side urinal thing   
>I look into the toilet   
>blue looks cool   
>jump into the blue   
>						****					 everywhere   
>Daddy, there's poop in here.   
>MFW
>be me, 4 years old
>at the carnival
>dad has to pee really bad
>dad takes me to porto-potty
>dad starts peeing in side urinal thing
>I look into the toilet
>blue looks cool
>jump into the blue
> **** everywhere
>Daddy, there's poop in here.
>MFW
#105 - dirtyhornets (04/25/2012) [-]
>3rd grade
>have to piss really bad
>ask teacher to go to washroom
>she says no
> ******* .jpg
>sitting in desk,without thinking i piss in my pants
>about to go out for recess and teacher holds me back
>asks if i had apple juice with my lunch
>say no
>she asks whats on my chair
>change my answer to yes quickly
>she proceeeds to clean up my piss
>asks why it smells funny
> ************ .jpg
>she realized she cleaned up my piss

<HFW


#174 - rolandrollin (04/25/2012) [-]
>Be 13
>Didn't **** self
>Didn't piss self
>MFW these comments
User avatar #92 - mrfourtysevenman (04/25/2012) [-]
>my friend got in argument with this prick @ school
>waits until coast is clear
>sneaks into his class
>he grabs prick's backpack
>takes it into bathroom
>feelsgoodman.jpg
>returns it unnoticed
>play waiting game
>bell rings
>prick goes to put his book into his backpack
>"it wont go down all the way"
>pulls book back out, bottom covered in ****
>prick smells up the whole ******* hallway
highfive friend
User avatar #43 - forfeitstar (04/25/2012) [+] (3 replies)
> Be 8 at my mums friends house with my twin sister
> Found a vibrator in mums friends bedroom
> Start chasing twin with it switched on
> Chase her downstairs where everyone is still holding the vibrator
> OhGodWhy.jpg
User avatar #55 to #50 - feelcat (04/25/2012) [-]
Punctuation is your friend.
User avatar #36 - skydevil (04/25/2012) [+] (4 replies)
> be in first year at secondary school
> need to go take a **** really bad
> ask teacher to go to bathroom
> teacher says no
> wait like a good boy for bell to ring
> stomach is about to explode, rumbling and now sweating
> teacher see's me and asks "do you need to go to the toilet?"
> youdontsay.jpg
> run while cluthing my ass shut
> get to the bathroom, but **** my pants before i can take them off
> tried to clean my underwear with tissue
> still covered in **** , didn't help much
> pull pants and trousers back up and walk back to class
> 5 mins before bell rings to go home, walk back into class room with **** stained pants and trousers
> go back to my seat
> *squish*
> everyone staring at me like wtf.
> ohgodwhy.jpg

#52 - onedoesgusta (04/25/2012) [-]
> Be 12 at a water park (girl)
> Go down the rapids with my dad
> Decide to hold onto his back like a monkey all the way down
> Become separated in the current
> See him and hold onto shoulders again
> Look to the side to see my dad staring at me
> I held onto a randy old stranger
> Never live it down
#260 - Gypsybob (04/25/2012) [-]
>At the doctor's getting a check up
>Doctor checking my testicles for lumps
>Get boner out of nowhere
>OHHELLNAW.jpg
>MFW
#113 - WitchKingTroll (04/25/2012) [-]
&gt;Be 12   
&gt;7:00 AM, go to play video games   
&gt;Suddenly, the doorbell rings   
&gt;Mom goes to answer it   
&gt;It's my drunkard, meth-addict brother   
&gt;He kicks the door in an attempt to open it after mom says he can't come in   
&gt;He gives up, goes around to back door   
&gt;He takes a boulder from the backyard and smashes the window   
&gt;See his hand reach for the back door's lock   
&gt;TheShining.jpg   
&gt;He goes inside, starts breaking 						****					   
&gt;Try to intimidate him with bo staff   
&gt;He runs upstairs to bathroom   
&gt;He comes out, 						****					 all over his face   
&gt;He goes back downstairs   
&gt;Check bathroom, 						*******					 						****					 everywhere and bottle of pills in toilet   
&gt;He runs away   
&gt;MFW when he leaves   
&gt;MFW I could be playing video games right now
>Be 12
>7:00 AM, go to play video games
>Suddenly, the doorbell rings
>Mom goes to answer it
>It's my drunkard, meth-addict brother
>He kicks the door in an attempt to open it after mom says he can't come in
>He gives up, goes around to back door
>He takes a boulder from the backyard and smashes the window
>See his hand reach for the back door's lock
>TheShining.jpg
>He goes inside, starts breaking ****
>Try to intimidate him with bo staff
>He runs upstairs to bathroom
>He comes out, **** all over his face
>He goes back downstairs
>Check bathroom, ******* **** everywhere and bottle of pills in toilet
>He runs away
>MFW when he leaves
>MFW I could be playing video games right now
#76 - thebukman (04/25/2012) [-]
>be 12 on skiing trip with family and sisters hot friend.
>had a crush on sisters friend.
>going indoor swimming.
>be in locker room before entering the pools.
>be naked and getting ready to shower.
>opening door to take a shower before swimming.
>mfw I realized I opened the door to the pools, and being naked in front of crush and sister.

#72 - themegafailtroll (04/25/2012) [+] (2 replies)
>be in 4th grade
>in gym class
>teacher is recording class for evaluation ****
>talking to a girl named Sarah
>friends making fun of me for talking to girl because we are young
>i yell at them saying 'NO! I LIKE BOYS!' right in front of the camera
>carry on with my day
>i forget he recorded that ****
>few years later
>now in 12th grade
>every time i see him when i go back to elementary school he calls me a faggot and laughs
>I wonder why
>he tells me
>mfw he showed the whole school board the video

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