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#35 - ragingflamingos ONLINE
Reply +88
(07/28/2013) [-]
Cats will use the bathroom outside. Its just that most people never let their cats out.
#249 to #35 - drinpa
Reply +1
(07/29/2013) [-]
You can also train cats to use the toilet.

www.wikihow.com/Toilet-Train-Your-Cat
#36 to #35 - dyllygaf ONLINE
Reply +7
(07/28/2013) [-]
My cats **** outside all the time and kill gophers for us
#53 to #36 - snowshark
Reply +1
(07/28/2013) [-]
My dog ***** outside on command and kills burglars for us.

Top that.
#327 to #53 - commontroll
Reply 0
(07/29/2013) [-]
My cat ***** in bathtubs and is currently being trained to start WW3 on command.

Just did.
#364 to #327 - snowshark
Reply 0
(07/29/2013) [-]
My dog ***** golden nuggets and can alter the fabric of space and time on command.
#365 to #364 - commontroll
Reply 0
(07/29/2013) [-]
MY CAT MADE MADE TIME, SPACE, YOU, AND YOUR DOG, AND COMMANDED YOU TO TRAIN IT TO ALTER TIME AND SPACE ON COMMAND.

CHECK, MOTHER ******* MATE.
#366 to #365 - snowshark
Reply 0
(07/29/2013) [-]
My dog knows why kids love the taste of cinnamon toast crunch.
#367 to #366 - commontroll
Reply 0
(07/29/2013) [-]
You fool! You just admitted defeat! Nobody knows why kids love cinnamon toast crunch! Not even kids!
#368 to #367 - snowshark
Reply 0
(07/29/2013) [-]
You clearly have no grasp of the magnitude of my dog's skills.

She can also divide by zero and knows the release dates for the third instalment in all of valve's flagship games.

Your more, cat-fag.
#369 to #368 - commontroll
Reply 0
(07/29/2013) [-]
Your dog can't do this.
Your dog can't do this.
#370 to #369 - snowshark
Reply +1
(07/29/2013) [-]
But she can do this.
But she can do this.
#371 to #370 - commontroll
Reply 0
(07/29/2013) [-]
YOU CANNOT WIN. Your dog would not exist if not for my cat!
YOU CANNOT WIN. Your dog would not exist if not for my cat!
#372 to #371 - snowshark
Reply 0
(07/29/2013) [-]
And Einstein would not exist without his mother, however it is not her we remember.

History is made by doing things, not making it possible for things to be done.

Hence, Dog is in the lead at the moment.
#373 to #372 - commontroll
Reply 0
(07/29/2013) [-]
Don't you understand, my cat is not the one who sets up history, but the one who created time, in order to make history, and futures! Your dog merely alters my cat's creation. Like the Dark Lord did to the elves.
#374 to #373 - snowshark
Reply 0
(07/29/2013) [-]
But does he know why kids love cinnamon toast crunch?
#375 to #374 - commontroll
Reply 0
(07/29/2013) [-]
You think I would have the gall to ask my cat of this? As lord and master of all, my cat knows, but will not share such glorious information with me.
#376 to #375 - snowshark
Reply 0
(07/29/2013) [-]
Keep telling yourself that.
#177 to #53 - anon
Reply 0
(07/29/2013) [-]
burglars around my area are known to carry sausages around with them and use the sausage to gain the dogs trust then swipe their ****.

It's happened to my neighbour, dude 3 houses down, and a dude at the end of my road.
#221 to #177 - snowshark
Reply +1
(07/29/2013) [-]
Luckily, in my area the burglars are dumb as ****.
#172 to #53 - newfeliperuiz
Reply +1
(07/29/2013) [-]
I read that as "my dog ***** on command" and it was a completely different kind of usefulness
#222 to #172 - snowshark
Reply +2
(07/29/2013) [-]
Oh no, she does that.

I imagine it would be really useful if I ever get any enemies.
#170 to #53 - dyllygaf ONLINE
Reply +7
(07/29/2013) [-]
I don't have to tell my cat to **** outside or kill gophers
#169 to #53 - furiousmarshmellow
Reply +7
(07/29/2013) [-]
I **** anywhere and kill anything that moves.


Top that.
#224 to #169 - snowshark
Reply +3
(07/29/2013) [-]
I have an Australian cousin.

She ***** everywhere and kills rocks with her teeth.