Lawyered. platypus hold discos on Tuesdays and Thursdays. Punch is served.. Iwas driving en Beach Boulevard behind an ancient guy in a beat up mick. He decides
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platypus hold discos on Tuesdays and Thursdays. Punch is served.

Iwas driving en Beach Boulevard behind an ancient guy in
a beat up mick.
He decides to tum in front of me without a blinker.
I accelerate to swerve and avoid him, and this,
woman Jumps in front of my carwash her
hand up.
She proceeds to yell in my window, "Hey, slow down we
idiot!" I' m a , mellow guy by nature, I ignore
As [drive away, she yells, "'"""""t" at me again. Twice? I
tum around and drive up next to her.
Do you have a prollem?" lash:
Yeah, why are yee driving like an idiot?"
l was driving like an idiot? How, exactly.‘
You were speeding. Iwatched you."
You were? I see. How did we measure my speed?" [Ever
l heard you."
So, yee measured my speed by ear?"
l can hear."
How fast did we HEAR me going?"
Look" she says, "I don' t have to take this. Here comes a
cop. l' ll wave him dowg
THE POLICE? This inman is a trip. She waves him down,
and preceeds to tell him that she observed me speeding.
What happened?" he asks. him the story, and told
him that I accelerated to an indicated 33 mph tthe speed
limit is 35] to avoid a coldfusion
Are those mufflers legal?" Ethel asks.
She' s pushing it. I reply, "l have a C. A. R. B. for
them." I give the paperwork's the cop.
She tries to find to screw me with. She
says "What about those big tires? They CAN' T be legal." I
began feeling little overheated gears in the back of my
head start to tern.
These tires were available en the 1970 Boss 429, "I told
the cop," Which makes them street legal as a
Ethel gets angry. She whines, "So yee' re net going to
give out any tickets to this 'r'""""'?"
The cop says, "No, I am net.‘
We about had it. So I say, "Sir, this inman told we
that she left the street at the comer, and she met up
with my car here. According to Title 39, pedestrians
have to cress the street at a right angle. This inman
admitted she creased at a angle, which is a
marketable offense."
What?" The cop looks cinfused.
Also, she teld we that she walked in frend of my car
to stop me. A citizen can' t detain sameone without
probable cause, under Terry v. Ohio tmy new favorite
case). Since she couldn' t measure my speed, she had
probable cause to detain me. That is an indictable
The cop says, "But, I didn' t see any of this."
But," I said, " did, and, as an officer of the Court, I can
demand her arrest. I' ll agree to dismiss the Illegal
Detention charge, but Iwant her cited for not creasing at
a right angle and Hazardous Conduct en a Public Street.‘
The cop called his Lieutenant, and after the cop told the
story, he authorized the summonses.
She went home with . 09 we rth of traffic tickets, and
they are worth a total offeer points against her license,
as well as the appropriate insurance surcharge!
Views: 39529
Favorited: 105
Submitted: 03/05/2014
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What do you think? Give us your opinion. Anonymous comments allowed.
#3 - teranin ONLINE (03/05/2014) [+] (1 reply)
I love when people try to wrong others and it blows up in their face.
#13 - xxxsonic fanxxx (03/06/2014) [+] (11 replies)
Law Students are not officers of the courts, and lawyers other than prosecutors do not have arrest powers beyond any normal person. Terry v. Ohio has to do with a temporary detention of a suspicious person by a law enforcement officer, it has nothing to do with civilian arrests. This is why first year law students are ******* stupid.

An actual Lawyer
User avatar #41 - ninjafaggots (03/06/2014) [+] (1 reply)
I had almost forgotten about that meme.
#5 - mankey (03/05/2014) [+] (2 replies)
Comment Picture
#19 - foggygolem (03/06/2014) [-]
See, THIS is why you don't dick with random people.
#15 - xxxsonic fanxxx (03/06/2014) [+] (1 reply)
Beach Blvd? Where the **** you live my ***** ?
#7 - roneffinswanson ONLINE (03/06/2014) [-]
Comment Picture
#47 - spinaltap (03/06/2014) [+] (6 replies)
boss 429 mustang-If it were physically possible id make sweet, sweet love to that car
#2 - frostdrachen ONLINE (03/05/2014) [-]
Comment Picture
#79 - dinocaster (03/06/2014) [+] (1 reply)
The immeasurable ammout of luck this guy had that the cop was a gullible one and didn't ask him for comprovative documents that he was already a jurist. The backfire would be hilariously catastrophic. The lady and the cop would laugh together, get along, marry later. and name their son Irony.
The immeasurable ammout of luck this guy had that the cop was a gullible one and didn't ask him for comprovative documents that he was already a jurist. The backfire would be hilariously catastrophic. The lady and the cop would laugh together, get along, marry later. and name their son Irony.
User avatar #61 - whaawhaa (03/06/2014) [+] (11 replies)
Every time I read this story there is one thing I can't get over. It's the fact that he says he is driving a 1970 BOSS 429. Now where only 499 of these cars made. I highly doubt that a college student is driving a super rare car worth six figures.
User avatar #63 to #61 - rindoshi (03/06/2014) [-]
he is not DRIVING the car, he says the tires were available for a 1970 BOSS 429, hence if he has tires that are the same or similar to ones that were stock for a legally sold car (even if in the 70's), they are legal.
#81 - fuckyosixtyminutes (03/06/2014) [-]
If you have to swerve to avoid someone turning in front of you (especially an "ancient" person who probably slows to 2 mph to turn) you're probably too high on the "closeness/speed" matrix.
#50 - huffe ONLINE (03/06/2014) [-]
#38 - landcucumber (03/06/2014) [+] (2 replies)
First, no to all of this. It is all wrong.
Second, what fascist state do these people live in?
Can't have certain mufflers and tires without a permit.
How can an officer give you a ticket for these, how can he possibly know that those tires are to big for that vehicle, and what is the reasoning behind this law? Yes the muffler one I get, but how is he going to measure it's emissions? that is done in the Tagging stage. So, if the Vehicle is licensed the officer must assume that it passed the emissions tests.

Finally what dumbass cop takes orders from a law student. Who is not licensed to practice law and is not a source of legal advise.
The exception to this however would be a third year law student who is interning under a practicing attorney, they can represent a client, or the state, as long as they are supervised, and the stakes are low and there is really no chance of an appeal. yeah run on sentence. What you going to do about it?
Oh and by the way cops usually have discretion to issue tickets as they see fit. Unless a mandatory law is in place, like in domestic abuse where someone is required to be arrested. Even then its murky. Really you can almost get away with anything.

anyway yeah this didn't happen, and if it did it would get thrown out darn quick if it did.
"officer did you witness this jay walking?" "no" "Then this is hearsay. now everyone go home."
#39 to #38 - xxxsonic fanxxx (03/06/2014) [-]
There are a plethora of laws across the states that restrict certain muffler mods or designs for various reasons including noise ordinances or emissions. Just because a vehicle is licensed does not mean it has passed emissions. Different states and cities have different regulations on emissions, for example, I live about two hours from a major city. My town does not require emissions testing but the major city does. A citizen can request for an officer to arrest someone if they have just cause. It says in the story that the cop had to confirm what the law student was spouting was true with his lieutenant. Because the lieutenant confirmed that the infringements listed were based on actual laws on the county or state level, the officer is thereby required to deal with the situation.

TLDR: Yes this is probably a fake story made for the lols but it is not completely wrong.
User avatar #36 - ajoifazrul (03/06/2014) [-]
what a bitch

you did good mate
#31 - alonetime (03/06/2014) [-]
dude, i love you

that was awesome
#16 - MuahahaOfLore (03/06/2014) [+] (4 replies)
I also go to Florida Coastal
I am also a 1L
Hit me up, maybe we know each other
#10 - deog (03/06/2014) [+] (2 replies)
Perhaps it didn't happen and it's just some law student fantasy of showing to the world how much he know, whatever.

Are law students really considered officers of the court?
#9 - xcoreyx (03/06/2014) [-]
Every time I read this it just makes me depressed because I know I will never be that awesome
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