insert witty skyrim title. . terrifing you hear: .. ‘L; cume to Markieren, ". she didnt got stabed . I saved her . skyrim is cool
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Tags: skyrim | is | cool
terrifing you hear: .. ‘L;
cume to Markieren, "
...
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Views: 59891
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Submitted: 12/05/2013
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Comments(203):

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User avatar #7 - johngun (12/05/2013) [+] (13 replies)
she didnt got stabed . I saved her .
User avatar #26 - Gandalfthewhite (12/05/2013) [+] (4 replies)
'safest city in the reach' ***** it's the only city in the ******* reach
#18 - mrsnowballs (12/05/2013) [+] (2 replies)
Obligatory Skyrim picture
#2 - sandez (12/05/2013) [+] (3 replies)
#4 - lolollo ONLINE (12/05/2013) [+] (9 replies)
> Doing Daedric prince of Shenanigans drinking quest.
> Wake up in Markarth
> Fend off angry Elder Scrolls Femanazis
> Walk outside
> Go to market
> See line for jewelery shop
> thatscute.jpg
> Walk up towards front
> "For the Forswarn!"
> wat
> take damage
> "sh'ok ****** , let's go"
> FUS-RO-DAH the ****** all the way to the silver smith area
> new personal record
> Everyone loses their ****
> Guards quickly disperse the scene
> Guards are obviously hiding **** in some Jason Bourne level conspiracy ****
> About as subtle as the Unites States during the 4th of July
> Eventually complete whole conspiracy quest
> Reach front of the city and look back
> Foresworn/guards/citizens/vampire...?...having a free for all all over town
> MFW after the chaos, everyone who's left starts getting worked up over the new bodies now adorning the streets.
#43 - MasterMario (12/05/2013) [+] (4 replies)
>doing miscellaneous sidequests
>finish one
>follow quest arrow to Markarth
>follow it again to the Jarl
>collect reward
>do more sidequests for the Jarl
>get stopped by guard on my way back from one
>"You have committed crimes against Skyrim and her people"
>ugh not this **** again
>kill guard
>more show up
>kill them all
>bounty literally over 9000
>go to Jarl to turn in quest
>he says appreciates all my help
>says he'll make me Thane if I help 5 people and buy a property
>apparently already helped 4
>just gotta help one more then buy a house
>look for someone to help
>stopped by guard
>what I thought I killed you all
>"You have committed crimes against Skyrim and her people"
>kill guard
>getting sick of this ****
cont.
#44 to #43 - MasterMario (12/05/2013) [-]
>go to Riverwood Inn and put all my stuff away in chests   
>come back to Markarth and get arrested on purpose   
>sentenced to work in mines for I don't know how long   
>find guy who has escape plan   
>excecute plan and escape   
>guards show up to stop us   
>bounty is still there   
>probably because I only served 4 hours of my double life-sentence   
>but wait   
>helping everyone escape prison counted as the 5th person helped   
>						****					 yes   
>buy house   
>talk to Jarl   
>he makes me Thane   
>gives me diplomatic immunity   
>guards can't arrest me   
>mfw
>go to Riverwood Inn and put all my stuff away in chests
>come back to Markarth and get arrested on purpose
>sentenced to work in mines for I don't know how long
>find guy who has escape plan
>excecute plan and escape
>guards show up to stop us
>bounty is still there
>probably because I only served 4 hours of my double life-sentence
>but wait
>helping everyone escape prison counted as the 5th person helped
> **** yes
>buy house
>talk to Jarl
>he makes me Thane
>gives me diplomatic immunity
>guards can't arrest me
>mfw
#25 - Ihazfunkitty (12/05/2013) [+] (2 replies)
"blood and silver, friend. blood and silver"
"blood and silver, friend. blood and silver"
#76 - sanguinesolitude (12/06/2013) [+] (3 replies)
>be thane of solitude   
> decides its time to become dark brotherhood hear some douche is trying to summon them   
> bust into his 						*******					 house and steal everything worthwhile, then find him humping some skeleton and chanting like a faggot   
> he gets a hardon and asks me to kill some bitch who is apparently being mean, even though she obviously is taking care of a bunch of orphans, apparently using her own money to support them. like i give a 						****					   
> go stab her in the face with a bunch of young children watching   
> later that day get a text from a blocked number #weknow. jerk off with the old lady's blood i collected and go to sleep   
> some whore wakes me up and says i'm supposed to kill someone, naturally i kill all of them and then try to set her on fire. This apparently is the right thing to do since she asks me to join.   
> kill every 						************					 they ask me to, and a bunch they dont.   
> finally kill some faggot jester and shadowmere 						*******					 rises from a pool of water like a zombie deathhorse. 						****					 is sweet   
> riding shadowmere up a mountain and down the other side, riding randomly through some woods, jump off him, he 						*******					 owns like 3 cave trolls while i watch   
>give him a carrot. well like throw one on the ground but 						****					 it it's the thought that counts   
>riding happily along in the woods, no idea where just exploring   
>suddenly i hear a dragon call, 						*******					 game on man. look up to see dragon swoop down picks me and horse up, but i slip off the horse.   
> see him lift shadowmere up into the air and drop him a few hundred feet   
> deadowmere   
> kill the dragon in annoyance and fast travel back to the brotherhood sanctuary   
> sleep overnight to give shadowmere time to regenerate   
> he isnt there in the morning   
> repeat like 10 times.   
>feelsbadman   
> look online and learn he revives at the spot where he was killed   
> mfw i have no idea where that was   
> mfw i have already saved over my only save thats less than a week old.   
> mfw shadowmere is gone forever
>be thane of solitude
> decides its time to become dark brotherhood hear some douche is trying to summon them
> bust into his ******* house and steal everything worthwhile, then find him humping some skeleton and chanting like a faggot
> he gets a hardon and asks me to kill some bitch who is apparently being mean, even though she obviously is taking care of a bunch of orphans, apparently using her own money to support them. like i give a ****
> go stab her in the face with a bunch of young children watching
> later that day get a text from a blocked number #weknow. jerk off with the old lady's blood i collected and go to sleep
> some whore wakes me up and says i'm supposed to kill someone, naturally i kill all of them and then try to set her on fire. This apparently is the right thing to do since she asks me to join.
> kill every ************ they ask me to, and a bunch they dont.
> finally kill some faggot jester and shadowmere ******* rises from a pool of water like a zombie deathhorse. **** is sweet
> riding shadowmere up a mountain and down the other side, riding randomly through some woods, jump off him, he ******* owns like 3 cave trolls while i watch
>give him a carrot. well like throw one on the ground but **** it it's the thought that counts
>riding happily along in the woods, no idea where just exploring
>suddenly i hear a dragon call, ******* game on man. look up to see dragon swoop down picks me and horse up, but i slip off the horse.
> see him lift shadowmere up into the air and drop him a few hundred feet
> deadowmere
> kill the dragon in annoyance and fast travel back to the brotherhood sanctuary
> sleep overnight to give shadowmere time to regenerate
> he isnt there in the morning
> repeat like 10 times.
>feelsbadman
> look online and learn he revives at the spot where he was killed
> mfw i have no idea where that was
> mfw i have already saved over my only save thats less than a week old.
> mfw shadowmere is gone forever
#49 - cartoonbacon (12/05/2013) [+] (2 replies)
I picked up skyrim and all the DLC I have been playing it like non-stop for 3 days and got like 45 hours in and I'm just getting started.
I picked up skyrim and all the DLC I have been playing it like non-stop for 3 days and got like 45 hours in and I'm just getting started.
#21 - englman (12/05/2013) [+] (1 reply)
When I walked in, I slowed time immediately and saved her.
MFW Markarth actually is the safest city in the Reach.
#8 - karvarausku (12/05/2013) [+] (5 replies)
Skyrim related woohoo!
#148 - lieutenantderp (12/06/2013) [-]
>Be in Markarth   
>Thrown into the mines   
>Mine the 						****					 out of everything   
>Escape   
>Smith everything into jewelry   
>mfw being sent to hard labor made me rich and high lvl in smithing
>Be in Markarth
>Thrown into the mines
>Mine the **** out of everything
>Escape
>Smith everything into jewelry
>mfw being sent to hard labor made me rich and high lvl in smithing
#138 - unyunpeel (12/06/2013) [+] (2 replies)
When I played skyrim, I had a ritual of killing the first person I met in every city to appease the god of the mudcrabs. MFW my pagan ritual saved an innocent civilian that you dorks let die.
#42 - sparkajh (12/05/2013) [+] (1 reply)
I wanted to restart skyrim the other day and that ************ decided it was done working, minimal scratches, installed game, just a big **** you. I've never been so hurt
User avatar #119 - jordanish (12/06/2013) [-]
Markarth ain't got **** on Riften. Drop anything in the market place, literally anything, an empty bottle, a sweet-roll, a sword, it doesn't matter. In 5 minutes half the town will have killed each other and the guards will either be trying to subdue the riot or rioting themselves.
User avatar #40 - evilgusti (12/05/2013) [+] (2 replies)
I am a king when it comes to Skyrim so the first thing I do is go up to the man and kill him.
You'll get a emerald necklace as a reward
User avatar #141 - letting (12/06/2013) [+] (3 replies)
Safest city in the Reach? OR ON Reach?

It's a Halo reference! Because Reach is a planet and it's certainly not safe, because ya know, The Covenant and...whatnot......yeah, I'll see myself out. Sorry.
User avatar #87 - bubbabrent (12/06/2013) [+] (2 replies)
Not to mention that CREEPY ASS DEMENTED POSSESSED ******* ROOM
#15 - rockergamer (12/05/2013) [+] (2 replies)
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