Politeness. . iam-. I remember that contract. He was so damn polite I was just like. "Okay I'm just going to murder you as softly... as... possib - (hits him) OH JESUS I CUT O Politeness iam- I remember that contract He was so damn polite just like "Okay I'm going to murder you as softly possib - (hits him) OH JESUS CUT O
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> hey anon, wanna give your opinion?
asd
User avatar #16 - cupotruth
Reply +184 123456789123345869
(07/22/2012) [-]
I remember that contract.

He was so damn polite I was just like.

"Okay I'm just going to murder you as softly... as... possib - (hits him) OH JESUS I CUT OF YOUR HEAD."
User avatar #15 - nsfwcontent
Reply +183 123456789123345869
(07/22/2012) [-]
I killed him then took his robes, put them on and strolled around like I owned the place; and with 100 destruction nobody who argues survived :L
#28 - tailsx
Reply +109 123456789123345869
(07/22/2012) [-]
I killed him and took all his books...
User avatar #39 to #28 - thebronyman
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(07/22/2012) [-]
I took his kingly Emperor robes and peruse the nearby town to show them to everyone
User avatar #63 to #28 - dustyshane
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(07/22/2012) [-]
He had a one-of-a-kind gilded Bracers in his bedroom.
#89 to #28 - Natelawl
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has deleted their comment [-]
#104 to #28 - anon id: 0e5e4312
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(07/22/2012) [-]
I took much more this his books...
#114 to #104 - tailsx
Reply +71 123456789123345869
(07/22/2012) [-]
Then a random guard walks in
Then a random guard walks in
#157 to #104 - anserine
Reply +22 123456789123345869
(07/22/2012) [-]
**anserine rolled a random image posted in comment #7023921 at My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic Discussion Forum **

SO I STABBED THE ****** AND TOOK HIS BOOKS
#191 to #104 - silverlance
Reply +6 123456789123345869
(07/23/2012) [-]
Oh god this made me laugh than anything on the front page
Oh god this made me laugh than anything on the front page
#33 to #28 - BrayBoy
Reply +20 123456789123345869
(07/22/2012) [-]
I took all his clothes.
I looked fly as hell while I dragged his corpse to his bed ...
#32 to #28 - ribsarntsogood
Reply +122 123456789123345869
(07/22/2012) [-]
i put a cabbage on all of my victims
User avatar #408 to #32 - superlolcopter
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(07/23/2012) [-]
I had the same idea. I was putting the dragon tongue flower, since I am the dragonborn.
#122 - trampballs
Reply +53 123456789123345869
(07/22/2012) [-]
I stole his clothes and was shocked to see how ******* ripped the old guy was
User avatar #168 to #122 - ishalltroll
Reply +3 123456789123345869
(07/22/2012) [-]
Every man in Skyrim is ripped and has the most badass abs ever..
User avatar #148 to #122 - yaarun
Reply +12 123456789123345869
(07/22/2012) [-]
like king bumi from TLA
#269 - BeaverBalls
Reply +50 123456789123345869
(07/23/2012) [-]
im going to be honest i didnt like anything about the skyrim dark brotherhood, none of the contracts ever made me feel like a skilled assassin, there was never a reward for actually being a silent assassin and doing your job with no one noticing. the whole thing could be done by some random nord with a claymore. and to make it just that much worse the leader of the whole sanctuary abandoned the old ways of the dark brotherhood and just embraced gold. she wanted me to kill the only member who still embraced the old ways, i am so glad that that cunt died


tl;dr i complain like a little fanboy bitch


pic related its a cunt
User avatar #338 to #269 - halor
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(07/23/2012) [-]
ya i enjoyed the who done it quest your given in Oblivion and was kind of hoping for another one like that...still found the quest slightly enjoyable minus the one that was less of an assassination and more of you hacking your way through a dwemer ruin to find one guy, then having the choice of hacking your way through the rest of it or walking out the way you came
#343 to #269 - turiantoaster
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#344 to #269 - turiantoaster
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(07/23/2012) [-]
assassin's creed ftw. and honestly how easy could it have been for general tulius to get assassinated? You literaly walk in the front door and the leader of the army in all of skyrim is standing right there, unprotected...
#373 to #269 - anon id: f36f029c
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(07/23/2012) [-]
The only reason why I killed Cicero was because he hurt Arnbjorn. Hey, I had to defend my packmate, no matter how much of an ass he was.
User avatar #296 to #269 - ThaJewBoy
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(07/23/2012) [-]
If you're an archer I had fun with it, Sneak up on people about 50 yards away or so, zoom in, slow down time. BAM. Dead. I thought it was fun at least...and yea, she was a major cunt...
#271 to #269 - snipesalot
Reply +3 123456789123345869
(07/23/2012) [-]
I guess I'm the only one who forgave Astrid.
User avatar #287 to #271 - holycrapimacupcake
Reply -1 123456789123345869
(07/23/2012) [-]
Yes. That bitch sold me out!
#291 to #287 - snipesalot
Reply -2 123456789123345869
(07/23/2012) [-]
So? Alot of people would have sold you out if they had the balls, thank god Astrid grew some and ******* did!
User avatar #303 to #291 - holycrapimacupcake
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(07/23/2012) [-]
Yes but she betrayed the family, you just don't do that.
#309 to #303 - snipesalot
Reply +3 123456789123345869
(07/23/2012) [-]
Only reason I forgave her was because her death was sad as ****, if it hadn't been I would have been pissed for being asked to kill the keeper (forgot name) and being betrayed.
User avatar #312 to #309 - holycrapimacupcake
Reply -1 123456789123345869
(07/23/2012) [-]
I killed Cicero because he also betrayed the family.
#340 to #312 - snipesalot
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(07/23/2012) [-]
I killed him, but regreted it later.
#294 to #271 - BeaverBalls
-6 123456789123345869
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#301 to #294 - snipesalot
Reply +5 123456789123345869
(07/23/2012) [-]
"i guess you are retard" Are you ******* kidding me.jpg
#307 to #301 - BeaverBalls
-5 123456789123345869
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#311 to #307 - snipesalot
Reply +4 123456789123345869
(07/23/2012) [-]
You think I suffer brain damage, yet you can't use grammar? Jesus ******* christ, people get dumber by the day.
#313 to #311 - BeaverBalls
-5 123456789123345869
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#330 to #313 - ohemgeezus
Reply +5 123456789123345869
(07/23/2012) [-]
jokes usually imply humor, blatantly calling someone a retard =/= a joke
#341 to #313 - snipesalot
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(07/23/2012) [-]
Doesn't change the fact you can't use grammar for ****.
#308 to #307 - BeaverBalls
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#86 - lawuser
Reply +42 123456789123345869
(07/22/2012) [-]
Felt the same way after I took Whiterun as a Stormcloak. I felt bad that I betrayed Balgruuf's trust 'cause he was a huge bro
User avatar #31 - FelipeRuiz
Reply +42 123456789123345869
(07/22/2012) [-]
I killed the ****** and took his socks.
#123 - akkere
Reply +41 123456789123345869
(07/22/2012) [-]
Feels like every time you do something against the Imperials, you can't help but feel wrong about it.

Like I go to Ulfric Stormcloak's place thinking he's like this badass freedom fighter whose super cool and ****, and then he's all like
"If they're not with me they're against me. If we have to crush them, then so be it."

I go to do the assassination of the Emperor, thinking he's like this tyrant asshole whose gonna cast spells at me screaming "UNLIMITED POWER"
And I get this nice old man who doesn't even try to fight.

I kind of wish there was a side quest where you could just eradicate the Thalmor from Skyrim, because that was the only real problem with the Imperials. Maybe they'll do that as a DLC, because both sides seem to kind of oppose the Aldmeri Dominion in one way or another.
#270 to #123 - anon id: e536b55b
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(07/23/2012) [-]
i didn't wait for dlc. i killed everyone in the thalmor embassy. everyone. no regrets.
User avatar #310 to #270 - sirgawain
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(07/23/2012) [-]
Killing people at an Embassy doesn't get rid of them, though. If anything, that'll make the thalmor more angry.
User avatar #378 to #123 - fadetometallica
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(07/23/2012) [-]
As a Nord, I picked Stormcloaks. I believed that the Aldmeri had no right to say who everyone should worship, especially for speciesist reasons.
I would always go through the Gray Quarter and sneak expensive armor I found into the Dark Elves' pockets though, so they could sell it and get some more money. I hated Ulfric's attitude toward other species, especially the Dark Elves, but I think that was better than having a whole nation be oppressed by elves from thousands of miles away.
#426 to #123 - anon id: b0c22a25
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(07/23/2012) [-]
I'm a dark elf and I will probably join Ulfric. I don't really like the Imperials, and I don't have any sort of allegiance for the Stormcloaks and I hate the Thalmor, such assholes. I would just join them for the quests to take out the cities. I love chaos. I play as a psycho out for myself, killing anyone in my way to get what riches I want. Although I am nice to the beggars and I give them some coin when I see them.




User avatar #142 to #123 - goldenpotato
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(07/22/2012) [-]
I really don't feel like that would be a good idea, story wise. Maybe in the next game, they're gone, or that is the storyline for the next game, but a side-quest? DLC? It'd feel a bit rushed.
User avatar #149 to #142 - akkere
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(07/22/2012) [-]
As a side quest it'd be rushed. But as a DLC, I could see it. Maybe not eradicate, per se, but at the very least pushed back to wherever the Aldmeri Dominion is stationed at.
If the DLC wasn't so much a DLC but as a legitimate expansion like The Shimmering Isles.
User avatar #153 to #149 - goldenpotato
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(07/22/2012) [-]
Agreed.
User avatar #362 to #123 - admiralen
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(07/23/2012) [-]
i just joined the empire since ulfric has the worst voice actor ever
User avatar #141 to #123 - thedutchs
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(07/22/2012) [-]
I joined the side of the Imperials because Ulfric would just have been another tyrant.

The Empire is the only force that can oppose the Aldmeri if only everyone pulled in the same direction...
User avatar #151 to #141 - akkere
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(07/22/2012) [-]
Yeah, it seemed like everyone was right about Ulfric the whole time. I couldn't understand how the Nords would support him, even seemingly sensible ones like Gerdur and her brother.

Maybe they were just hyped up from the anger against the Aldmeri Dominion and the outlaw of Talos worship.
User avatar #159 to #123 - corundum
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(07/22/2012) [-]
Skyrim may deserve independence, but not under that douche, and not now, when Tamriel needs unity most.
User avatar #165 to #123 - ishalltroll
Reply +8 123456789123345869
(07/22/2012) [-]
Ulfric Stormcloak is like the Adolf Hitler of Tamriel, have you been to the "grey quarter"? Holy **** that ****** like a goddamn nazi ghetto in poland.
#152 to #123 - Japsterise
Reply +14 123456789123345869
(07/22/2012) [-]
I chose Ulfric, not knowing that he'd be an asshole. I think I only chose him for the house. (Pic related)
#160 to #152 - shcifter
Reply +5 123456789123345869
(07/22/2012) [-]
You can get the house if you win the imperial war.
User avatar #36 - somniumecstasi
Reply +6 123456789123345869
(07/22/2012) [-]
mfw I killed the emperor and got 20000 septims from amaund motierre
#37 to #36 - somniumecstasi
Reply +40 123456789123345869
(07/22/2012) [-]
User avatar #43 to #37 - andnowducks
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(07/22/2012) [-]
Then you had to spend it.
User avatar #45 to #43 - somniumecstasi
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(07/22/2012) [-]
I didn't care, when I got the money I already had over 100000 septims.
User avatar #46 to #45 - andnowducks
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(07/22/2012) [-]
Oh **** *****, I felt the same when I joined the storm cloaks, my favourite jarl was Whiterun's.
User avatar #47 to #46 - somniumecstasi
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(07/22/2012) [-]
I was glad that Astrid died. she is a bitch.
User avatar #48 to #47 - andnowducks
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(07/22/2012) [-]
Same, when you complete the game do you see her in Sovngard?
User avatar #50 to #48 - somniumecstasi
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(07/22/2012) [-]
haven't been in sovngarde yet, I'm too lazy to get through Skuldafn. I heard it's a huge dungeon.
User avatar #51 to #50 - andnowducks
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(07/22/2012) [-]
It's not that big tbh, on the way you get a **** load of draugr and frost bites, thats all.
User avatar #55 to #51 - somniumecstasi
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(07/22/2012) [-]
oh ok
well in the meantime I completed 2 questlines, my heavy armor went up to level 100, got 2 dragon priest masks and became thane of every hold. I'm currently level 43
User avatar #57 to #55 - andnowducks
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(07/22/2012) [-]
I got one dragon preist mask, completed all the questlines, (I mean main) I'm a level 26 with 100 pick pocket, 100 lockpick and speech.
User avatar #58 to #57 - somniumecstasi
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(07/22/2012) [-]
I suck at mage and thief perks
btw I'm a dark elf.
User avatar #59 to #58 - andnowducks
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(07/22/2012) [-]
I'm a wood elf, it was hard for me but you get this amazing shout, a dragon preist mask and some gold coins, about 1000 from all the draugr you kill.
User avatar #61 to #59 - somniumecstasi
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(07/22/2012) [-]
that shout... storm call right?
and the two questlines I completed were the ones from the companions and the dark brotherhood.
and I ******* hate dwarven ruins.
User avatar #75 to #61 - andnowducks
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(07/22/2012) [-]
Did you join the stormcloaks?
User avatar #430 to #75 - somniumecstasi
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(07/23/2012) [-]
yes I did. and I killed Paarthurnax.
User avatar #431 to #430 - andnowducks
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(07/23/2012) [-]
Why?
User avatar #433 to #431 - somniumecstasi
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(07/23/2012) [-]
because I thought the greybeards are basically pointless because I can use the internet to find out where to get shouts or words of power
and by the way, at least my followers can do something useful now.
User avatar #436 to #433 - andnowducks
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(07/23/2012) [-]
But Paarthunax is badass.
User avatar #437 to #436 - somniumecstasi
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(07/23/2012) [-]
nahhh. he talks too much.
User avatar #439 to #437 - andnowducks
0 123456789123345869
(07/23/2012) [-]
I guess so, and he always speaks dragon and I'm like "What the **** I don't speak dragon!"
User avatar #62 to #61 - andnowducks
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(07/22/2012) [-]
I know I hate them aswell, and yes storm call, you have to go through one with the main quest line, I have done theives guild, started companions, dark brotherhood, stormcloaks and have some deadric weapons which are badass, and I have dragonbane.
User avatar #432 to #62 - somniumecstasi
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(07/23/2012) [-]
I have almost all Daedric weapons, the only one I miss is Peryite's Spellbreaker.
why?
because dwarven ruins.
User avatar #434 to #432 - andnowducks
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(07/23/2012) [-]
Okay, **** me if these aren't Deadra, I have the mace of Molag Bal, Mehrunes' Razor, The Wabbajack and Ring of Narmira
User avatar #435 to #434 - somniumecstasi
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(07/23/2012) [-]
yep, those things are daedric. mace of molag bal was one of my first daedric weapons and my favorite one-handed weapon. my favorite two-handed weapon is Volendrung, a warhammer.
User avatar #438 to #435 - andnowducks
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(07/23/2012) [-]
How do you get that?
User avatar #453 to #438 - somniumecstasi
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(07/23/2012) [-]
no idea, I think you'll have to look it up on the interwebz
but it might be close to the shadow stone, I really can't remember
User avatar #451 to #438 - somniumecstasi
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(07/23/2012) [-]
I never use a staff and yes it's Movunskar.
User avatar #452 to #451 - andnowducks
0 123456789123345869
(07/23/2012) [-]
And also where is the orc strongehold located, loiek what building is it next too?
User avatar #449 to #438 - somniumecstasi
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(07/23/2012) [-]
that staff you were talking about must be the Sanguine Rose. the guy you met in the bee and barb is the daedric prince Sanguine. the girl should be Ysolda, she indeed told you something about a ring and a love story. go to this "fiance" (IT'S A ******* HAGRAVEN), get that **** done, then you do some other ****, bringing back a goat or something because you stole the goat and sold it to a giant. and then you go to this castle/fort, via there you will enter a strange place, walk a little further and find Sanguine. he'll give you that staff. and then you will return to the bee and barb.
derp.
User avatar #450 to #449 - andnowducks
0 123456789123345869
(07/23/2012) [-]
Is the place called Morvunskar? and also is the staff of ice storms any good?
User avatar #447 to #438 - somniumecstasi
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(07/23/2012) [-]
do you have the mask of Clavicus Vile yet?
go to Falkreath, a guard might say something about the blacksmith and a dog. go to the blacksmith, talk with him about the dog, he'll give you some meat to find this dog in the woods outside Falkreath. when you found the dog, he'll tell you his name is Barbas and he is Clavicus Vile's pet. go to the shrine of clavicus vile, inside Haemar's shame if I'm not mistaken. clavicus vile tells you to find the rueful axe. when you found the axe, return to the shrine, you get the choice to kill Barbas or to let him live. if you kill barbas, you will get the Rueful axe. if you don't kill him, you'll get the mask of clavicus vile and barbas will return to his master.
I chose the mask.
User avatar #448 to #447 - andnowducks
0 123456789123345869
(07/23/2012) [-]
I'm trying to get some sort of staff now, I went to Riften in the bee and the barb and I entered this driking contest, I won but passed out, and apparently he promised me a staff and I went into the temple of Dibellia and messed the place up and also I went to this girl and she said that I was taking a ring to my fiance.
User avatar #444 to #438 - somniumecstasi
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(07/23/2012) [-]
ehhhh... ebony blade. a two-handed weapon.
first you go talk to jarl Bargruulf the greater (or how do you spell that guy's name) and talk to him about his kids. then you go to one of his children, talk to that kid, he'll say something about a whispering door. go to the door, talk to the door (dude what), and the daedric prince Mephala, lady of whispers, will tell you to get the key to open the door. to get that key, you have to pickpocket Farengar Secret-Fire or the jarl. open the door, there will be a room with a table, on the table is the ebony blade.
User avatar #445 to #444 - andnowducks
0 123456789123345869
(07/23/2012) [-]
Fuuuu, I ran the jarl out, but I have an ebony geart sword.
User avatar #442 to #438 - somniumecstasi
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(07/23/2012) [-]
hmm... I think dawnbreaker isn't that bad.
just find the shrine to Meridia (not far from Solitude), talk to the statue (stonerhumor) and then she tells you to find Meridia's beacon. find that thing, bring it back to her and then she says her temple or something is all ****** up, so clear the temple/ruin out, and then you will receive/find dawnbreaker. one-handed weapon, especially effective on undead.
User avatar #443 to #442 - andnowducks
0 123456789123345869
(07/23/2012) [-]
Oh yeah I also have that, it's ******* awesome, any more?
User avatar #440 to #438 - somniumecstasi
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(07/23/2012) [-]
well, there's somewhere near Riften an Orc stronghold named... largashbur or something like that
you need to enter that, and then talk to the chief or something and he tells you to oh god I don't remember blablabla and then he tells you to go to a cave or something and you have to find the warhammer in the cave, bring it back to that chief, and then Malacath (daedric prince, orc god) will talk and say the chief is a lazy ****** and then he gives you volendrung.
derp.
User avatar #441 to #440 - andnowducks
0 123456789123345869
(07/23/2012) [-]
Okay, thanks, what other deadria things are good?
#324 - moneybag
Reply +38 123456789123345869
(07/23/2012) [-]
I tried to capture his soul with a soul gem but for some reason it didnt catch it. No soul gem could hold the balls of that man. I
#352 to #324 - anon id: f36f029c
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(07/23/2012) [-]
Did you try a black soul gem? 'Cause if that didn't work then weird.
#329 to #324 - ohemgeezus
Reply +30 123456789123345869
(07/23/2012) [-]
Shoulda brought along a....master gem
right?
anyone?