Alcohol...

So, this one time I ordered a salad. And this guy was walking past my table , and he said, “Wow, that looks delicious! I think I might order one of those!”
“OH man, you totally should,” I said.
He walked away. A few minutes later, he returned with his own salad, except he had gotten his with blue cheese dressing, and I had gotten mine with bacon vinaigrette. He said ” I figured that these salads are too good to enjoy alone, so I thought I would come and sit with you.” We proceeded to talk about dressing preferecences, and our favourite crunchy salad toppers (Croutons? walnuts? Sunflower seeds?) .

The conversation moved on to work and family. He asked me what my father did for a living, and I said that he was a sea captain. He said “No way, my dad is a sea captain too!”
“Are you for real?” I asked. “What ships has he been on?”
“Well” he said. and started counting off on his fingers, “There was the RMS Horse Apples, the SS Whistling Pisser, and before that he was a first mate on the USS Rick Springfield –”
When I heard that name, chills moved down my whole body. “The…. the Rick Springfield? My father captained the Rick Springfield. Before I was born.”
WInston’s (the guy’s name was Winston) face grew stony. “Your father” he asked quietly
I nodded.
So you father was Iron Knee McGlee?”
I nodded again
“You know, then, that we can never be together. For ours is a long and bitter enmity which runs in our blood, and will run in the blood of our children and grandchildren.”
I nodded a third time , and pushed my chair back from the table. “This is how it must be, Winston, although I feel have grown to love you during our short conversation. The bond I have to my family obliges me to be your bitter enemy.”