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Adventures of God

 
Adventures of God. This is nothing compared to the old testament. And hey, dude got a medal, and I got to draw God's butt. All is good. Check out my stuff on it

This is nothing compared to the old testament. And hey, dude got a medal, and I got to draw God's butt. All is good.

Check out my stuff on
itsthetie.com
facebook.com/itsthetie

Have a good one!

Tags: itsthetie
PM , please let new win Pear Jesus, please let me win
the I 00111 Olympics ' f the I Olympics
Ill
Yeah w
elm: -true
...
+3156
Views: 117951 Favorited: 176 Submitted: 09/06/2015
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[ 164 comments ]
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92 comments displayed.
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+607
#56 - anon (09/06/2015) [-]
Jesus: I have an idea, we'll let one of them win the Olympics this year, and then in four years we'll...
God: Too late, I already crushed Hart's legs.
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+87
#119 to #56 - babyturtlefilms (09/07/2015) [-]
**babyturtlefilms used "*roll picture*"**
**babyturtlefilms rolled image** Jesus can do miracles tho
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+12
#120 to #119 - anon (09/07/2015) [-]
**anonymous used "*roll picture*"**
**anonymous rolled image** Oh god that roll
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+3
#141 to #119 - thehistorylover (09/07/2015) [-]
That roll was perfect!
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+613
#13 - ldnelson (09/06/2015) [-]
Good thing it was the same religion so they could find a compromise
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+9
User avatar #126 to #13 - assassindash (09/07/2015) [-]
Jesus just got punched through his ******* stomach....

GG Jesus, well played, good luck next fight you reincarnating asshole.
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+3
#127 to #126 - anon (09/07/2015) [-]
**anonymous used "*roll picture*"**
**anonymous rolled image**
he's come back from worse
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+3
User avatar #128 to #127 - assassindash (09/07/2015) [-]
That's what the reincarnating part is joking on. In fact, he reincarnates as the same person, which is a dick move to people who believe in certain aspects of reincarnation.
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-1
#152 to #128 - amuzen ONLINE (09/10/2015) [-]
not necessarily, supposedly during his first coming he was a lamb where as in his second coming he'll be a lion or something like that which kind of leads me to believe he'd reincarnate into quite a different person.
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+1
User avatar #153 to #152 - assassindash (09/11/2015) [-]
OK, so clearly one of us has gone full retard, and I'm pretty sure it's not me, because I don't remember Jesus ever not coming back as Jesus....

Let alone a freaking goat. Or lamb....

Unless this is another branch of religion i've never heard about that believes Jesus reincarnated into something else.
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-1
#154 to #153 - amuzen ONLINE (09/11/2015) [-]
not as a literal lamb or lion I imagine but from what I understand during his first coming he's called 'the lamb of god' and it's predicted that when he is reincarnated he will come as 'the lion of Judah' or something like that. It's considered fairly mainstream Christianity I'm pretty sure.

I don't think it's supposed to be taken literally and like just about everything in the bible it's probably an allegory for something, but ya know with the **** that goes on in the bible sure maybe you should take it literally and imagine him as having first been born as the literal 'lamb of god' and his second he will be the literal 'lion of judah' if nothing else it's kind of funny imagery to think 'oh ya by the way that whole time jesus was a lamb'
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+1
User avatar #155 to #154 - assassindash (09/11/2015) [-]
The first word he then spoke to his people, "Moo."

He wasn't a very good lamb, but damn was he good at feeding the people.
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+1
#156 to #155 - amuzen ONLINE (09/11/2015) [-]
hopespring.org/2010/12/01/the-lamb-and-the-lion/

So I looked it up because I was curious and it's some pretty crazy **** because essentially in Jesus's second coming he'll be a slightly more successful Hitler.

If Hitler had succeeded in taking over the world and eradicating the Jew's he literally would be Jesus which is kinda ***** .
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0
User avatar #147 to #126 - mrwalkerfour (09/07/2015) [-]
punched through stomach
head cracked
left arm crushed by elephants mouth
right arm trapped by trunk
about to recieve another body punch
about to get an axe


GG no re
Reply
+15
#100 to #13 - bleeduntildeath ONLINE (09/07/2015) [-]
that looks like rough sex, and it explains too much
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+37
User avatar #35 to #13 - analcontractions (09/06/2015) [-]
That would be such a cool video game.
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+112
#39 to #35 - awec (09/06/2015) [-]
So basically, Smite?
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+1
#113 to #39 - anon (09/07/2015) [-]
jesus is in smite? because that would be ******* rad.
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0
User avatar #134 to #113 - commontroll (09/07/2015) [-]
Jesus would probably be super OP honestly, total control over cloning **** , flying, and storms? Zeus ain't got **** on his cloning or alchemy.
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+77
User avatar #51 to #13 - vladi (09/06/2015) [-]
I'll give this one to Ganesh. More limbs + an axe and he's also an elephant.
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+131
User avatar #54 to #51 - turlesrfun (09/06/2015) [-]
That's why Indians always win the spelling bees.
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+21
User avatar #79 to #51 - balor (09/06/2015) [-]
Jesus has healing powers tho.
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+12
User avatar #64 to #51 - misterbluecoat (09/06/2015) [-]
Jesus is a reality manipulate so he's got this.
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+4
#95 to #51 - anon (09/07/2015) [-]
Spongebob's Elephant Trunk
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-36
#58 to #51 - anon (09/06/2015) [-]
Says the attention whore who comments on all of the top comments.

Kill yourself already
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+31
#61 to #58 - vladi (09/06/2015) [-]
I don't know who you are, but I can assure I only reply to posts I something to say about.
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-9
#80 to #61 - anon (09/06/2015) [-]
your a theme account whore, no one cares what your opinion is
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+20
#81 to #80 - anon (09/06/2015) [-]
You're ******* anon, your opinion is less than him
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+2
#112 to #81 - anon (09/07/2015) [-]
You're all on FunnyJunk; none of your opinions matter in the least.
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0
User avatar #122 to #112 - ninjaspartan (09/07/2015) [-]
We're all on the internet, which FunnyJunk is on. So we're all partially retarded.
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+1
#139 to #58 - anon (09/07/2015) [-]
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-7
#59 to #58 - feelthebern (09/06/2015) [-]
Amen
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0
User avatar #68 to #51 - entarasu (09/06/2015) [-]
its actually a she
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+31
User avatar #27 to #13 - itsthetie [OP]ONLINE (09/06/2015) [-]
This was definitely an inspiration for this comic, I love me some pbfcomics
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+33
User avatar #40 to #13 - tuscanjackal (09/06/2015) [-]
The **** is this **** ?

Why is Jesus totally unarmed? Why doesn't he get to use his whip, or throw nails as a ranged?

Is his lvl three special going to have him use his carpentry skills to build a trebuchet to throw his opponents into the sky, where he hits them with lightning and roundhouse punches them back into the arena?
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+8
User avatar #85 to #40 - caesarslegion (09/06/2015) [-]
During the Armageddon, Jesus destroys entire Demon Armies by merely talking. He wields no weapons or armor and instead just goes around speaking bible verses at demon armies effortlessly annihilating them. Jesus is the epitome of peace therefore he doesn't fight, but speaks.
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+11
User avatar #97 to #85 - barakakaka (09/07/2015) [-]
So he is a Dragonborn?
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+4
User avatar #98 to #97 - buddywuggle (09/07/2015) [-]
FUS RO bless you [explosions.]
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0
User avatar #124 to #85 - doctorcamden (09/07/2015) [-]
its a shame hes not fighting a demon in the comic, but a deity.
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0
User avatar #121 to #85 - henrycolt (09/07/2015) [-]
> Destroys entire Demon Armies by merely talking
> Jesus is the epitome of peace.

Well , lucky demons
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0
User avatar #111 to #85 - inomgod (09/07/2015) [-]
what else do you expet from a man who Father spoke the universe into existence?
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0
#107 to #40 - innocentbabies (09/07/2015) [-]
You have just made me realize how awesome a fighting game with figures from mythology would be. It's too bad that I have neither the skills, nor the motivation to do so.
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+223
#14 - elsanna (09/06/2015) [-]
>white guy
>winning a running event at the olympics

Fixed.

Nice as always itsthetie
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+2
#133 to #14 - gerfox (09/07/2015) [-]
Actually, on middle distance some of the best times ever (albeit very few of them) are set by white people. Sebastian Coe, Bernard Cram have respectively the third best time ever on 1500 meters and the fourth best on the mile run. For women however, most of the best times ever are set by former Soviet/Eastern European athletes in the 80s and 90s.
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+4
#88 to #14 - anon (09/07/2015) [-]
i cant thumb this up because im blocked
idk why i am
-love, childpls
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+4
User avatar #90 to #88 - elsanna (09/07/2015) [-]
childpls I unblocked you. I don't know why I blocked you.

Just don't be an asshole and we'll be fine.
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+4
User avatar #96 to #90 - childpls (09/07/2015) [-]
<3
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+8
User avatar #110 to #14 - TestesFly ONLINE (09/07/2015) [-]
If you don't change the hair style he just looks Indian.
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+14
#15 to #14 - itsthetie [OP]ONLINE (09/06/2015) [-]
<3
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+15
#52 to #14 - huffelsnuff (09/06/2015) [-]
>black guy
> "olsen"
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+32
#72 to #52 - stianan (09/06/2015) [-]
probably a swede
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+2
#129 to #72 - anon (09/07/2015) [-]
Rather Dane or Norwegian, if he were a Swede his name would be Olson not Olsen
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+1
User avatar #87 to #72 - exotic (09/06/2015) [-]
Holy ****
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+21
User avatar #7 - mizzdepp (09/06/2015) [-]
God that was good
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+4
#114 to #7 - unpopular (09/07/2015) [-]
Jesus that was good
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+3
User avatar #123 to #114 - ninjaspartan (09/07/2015) [-]
Satan that was good
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+35
#9 to #7 - itsthetie [OP]ONLINE (09/06/2015) [-]
Thanks a lot!
Reply
+40
#20 - nerdkoopa (09/06/2015) [-]
Bring out the reference jar.
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0
User avatar #148 to #20 - jesusisagoose (09/07/2015) [-]
i don't get it, but i still thumbed up incase it would take to long to reply
For you
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+14
#21 to #20 - nerdkoopa (09/06/2015) [-]
******* really? Last panel ****** up? I hope this one works...
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+18
#10 - thejudgingmoose (09/06/2015) [-]
I mean...holy **** , I guess that worked.
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+16
User avatar #106 - docxy (09/07/2015) [-]
Jesus Christ: "how horrifying"
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+13
#24 - evilhomer (09/06/2015) [-]
Talking about escalator injuries...
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0
User avatar #34 to #24 - incognitoad (09/06/2015) [-]
(S)hedead.gifm
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+4
User avatar #38 to #34 - derivat (09/06/2015) [-]
It took multiple hours to get her (parts) out of the system
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+5
User avatar #48 to #38 - incognitoad (09/06/2015) [-]
Yeah, I imagine after something like that there's not much left but ribbons. The thing that annoys me most about that incident is that two of the women at the top of the escalator had just gone up it and noticed that the floor was loose but did nothing but get another woman to stand at the top.
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0
#138 to #24 - anon (09/07/2015) [-]
And yet those two idiots don't even bother to be like "Hey, this escalator is ****** , and there's this thing called an EMERGENCY STOP BUTTON not even a foot from us...Oh hai. OH **** that lady getting ******* made into spaggetti! Wow that's ****** ! OMG! Save her boy!"



Big ******* RED BUTTON. How hard is that to push? Srsly. Most of us are dieing to push big red ******* buttons to feel like the progenitor of a nuclear apocalypse, but yet these two numbskulls can't even press it to save a life.
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0
#161 to #24 - nightmarexnxnxnxnx (10/02/2015) [-]
My ******* god!
What the hell...
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+15
#37 to #24 - anon (09/06/2015) [-]
I remember reading about this; she died to the accident.

Not just died, but got ******* mangled-- we're talking super dead. Humpty dumpty got nothing on her kind of dead.
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+13
#74 - anon (09/06/2015) [-]
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+13
User avatar #53 - whtkid (09/06/2015) [-]
What the hell happened to my thumbs!?
How will I know what's funny unless it's labeled!!?
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+81
#11 - chokinandtokin ONLINE (09/06/2015) [-]
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+1
#115 to #11 - obliviscor ONLINE (09/07/2015) [-]
I dun get it
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+2
User avatar #116 to #115 - chokinandtokin ONLINE (09/07/2015) [-]
Jesus is blowing him
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+45
#31 - mudkipfucker ONLINE (09/06/2015) [-]
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+11
#22 - letrollzor (09/06/2015) [-]
Guy in the wheelchair be like "At least i won"
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+21
#6 - anon (09/06/2015) [-]
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+7
#83 - xxjmacxx ONLINE (09/06/2015) [-]
Alternatively...

Although this comic was hilarious as every itsthetie comic is
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+1
User avatar #118 to #83 - Marker ONLINE (09/07/2015) [-]
fakin hell that was good
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+6
User avatar #57 - shieeetposter (09/06/2015) [-]
WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO THE THUMBS? NOOOOOO
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+5
#102 - reinbowxdash ONLINE (09/07/2015) [-]
Reply
0
#162 to #102 - cyberviking (10/03/2015) [-]
Really man, really?
Reply
+4
#23 - xskullgirlsx (09/06/2015) [-]
Reminded me of that Final Destination scene

But with a happier ending
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