Great Britain is best Britain. Found this online, found it funny, thought I'd share.. 32 Things British People Have To Deal With In 2014 1. I met Rolf Harris wh
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Great Britain is best Britain

Found this online, found it funny, thought I'd share.

32 Things British People
Have To Deal With In 2014
1. I met Rolf Harris when I was young and he
didn' t try anything. Now I think I was an
ugly child.
2. I' just had to tell I want porn.
3. I can' t go anywhere without being told to
Keep Calm and do something.
4. I made eye contact with a stranger on the
tube. We both looked away out of the
window, and our reflections made eye
contact.
5. Being unable to pay for something with the
exact change without saying "I think that' s
right."
6. Briefly opening the window and letting in
fifty midges, twenty flies, seven bees, two
pigeons and a fox.
7. Running out ways to say thanks when a
succession doors are held tor you,
having already deployed 'cheers', 'ta' and
nice one.'
8. Waiting tor permission to leave after
paying for something with the exact
change.
9. We have to opt in to view porn but we can' t
opt out of royal baby news.
10. I want to buy a cheap pair of tracksuit
bottoms for the gym but every pair I find is
expensive because chavs wear them as
fashion items.
11. Prince George is a year old and has already
visited half the countries I' always
wanted to.
12. I get more text messages from my local
Domino' s, than any of my friends.
13. I pay 29000 to go to this university and
they haven' t even put Dyson Airblasts in
the toilets.
14. I wish to feed myself at Heathrow but do
not want to go into debt.
15. I tuned at someone who pushed into the
queue, and they turned and looked at me.
16. My 64 year old father has only Just heard of
Benedict Cumberbatch and thinks his
name is so hilarious that he' s constantly
17. I got 5 minutes into one of Jamie' s 30
Minute Meals then realised I' d forgotten to
grow a herb garden in my kitchen
18. At 24. 89, a ham sandwich, bag of crisps
and bottle of water is neither a 'meal or a
deal'.
19. I accidentally bought a bottle of Coke with
Richard" on it and now outworkers won' t
stop making jokes about a Dick in my
mouth.
20. Tesco want . 50 for an empty jam jar.....
on the next aisle they are charging for
the same jar filled with pickled onions.....
21. charge you for a plastic bag
because they' re being "environmentally
conscious", then give you an entire tree' s
worth of receipts and discount vouchers.
22. We ran out Yorkshire Tea bags at work
so now I have to drink Tetley like some
kind of animal.
23. If "Googie Fiber" comes to the UK I worry
they won' t spell Fibre correctly.
24. The Canadians have stolen our stereotype
of being polite, but we' re too polite to
make a fuss over it.
25. Every pub meal is now served on a f** king
chopping board.
26. I told my friend to "pop round whenever"
and she actually turned up unannounced.
27. Not knowing whether to search for
United Kingdom", "Great Britain" or
England" on drop down boxes.
28. Scientists have slaved for years to produce
a sheet of material one atom thick.
Unfortunately tor them the makers of my
bin bags beat them to it.
29. I always say "excuse me" when what I
really mean is "Get the Wk out of my way
you retarded c** t! What made you think
that was a sensible place to stand you
30. The three second jingle tor BBC One on
the iplayer is significantly louder than the
programmes.
31. Lorries travelling at 56. that feel a
desperate urge to overtake other lorries
that are travelling at 55. 9981 mph on the
only stretch of dual carriageway for the
next 20 miles.
32. I want the London look, but my front
teeth touch.
...
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Views: 26429
Favorited: 50
Submitted: 07/24/2014
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Comments(135):

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What do you think? Give us your opinion. Anonymous comments allowed.
#8 - nsfwcontent (07/24/2014) [+] (1 reply)
stickied by noisia
Numba 16 'as bin cut off early ya tossa
#72 - smoothmcgroove (07/25/2014) [+] (2 replies)
C... Constantly what? He constantly whats? WHAT DOES HE CONSTANTLY??

inb4 wat
#10 - qotsa (07/24/2014) [+] (4 replies)
i don't like dyson airblades. if many people use them, just as in a cinema i sometimes go to, water collects at the bottom and leaks to the floor. and they're loud as **** .
#23 to #10 - bemmo (07/24/2014) [-]
The thing is, they actually succeed at drying your hands.
The thing is, they actually succeed at drying your hands.
#74 - fuckallyouniggers (07/25/2014) [+] (2 replies)
read 6 as "briefly opening the window and letting in fifty midgets"
#16 - anonymous (07/24/2014) [+] (7 replies)
The stereotype is that the british are pussy's and non confrontational, not polite, that appears to be true according to 29.
#17 to #16 - anonymous (07/24/2014) [-]
they non-confronted their way to having the largest naval empire ever I suppose...?
#13 - fillthisspace (07/24/2014) [+] (3 replies)
You forgot that when you go abroad, you're either from London or Manchester.
#2 - mudkipfucker (07/24/2014) [+] (2 replies)
User avatar #15 - PubLandlord (07/24/2014) [+] (2 replies)
This past week, going out in shorts and t shirt because it's been 25 degrees only to be hit with torrential rain

Still ducking when pigeons fly near me

Going into a pub or bar to discover it's a spoons

#9 - ExorArgus (07/24/2014) [-]
As a Canadian i apologize for number 24.
#89 - mrbobert (07/25/2014) [+] (1 reply)
24 + 29   
   
 I've never heard of this polite thing being a british stereotype ever.    
 u avin urself a giggle m8 blimey cunt ill sok u in ur gobber m8 i sware on me mum
24 + 29

I've never heard of this polite thing being a british stereotype ever.
u avin urself a giggle m8 blimey cunt ill sok u in ur gobber m8 i sware on me mum
#106 - xxitzchubbsxx (07/25/2014) [-]
laughed my arse off to this one.
#78 - manager (07/25/2014) [-]
#15
#45 - anonymous (07/25/2014) [+] (1 reply)
neither a mean NOR a deal, faggot
#46 to #45 - anonymous (07/25/2014) [-]
meal, for ****** sake, my point is now moot.
#49 - biembobo ONLINE (07/25/2014) [+] (3 replies)
what is up with porn in the UK nowadays? i heared something vague like it was banned or something but i'm haven't got a clue what's really going on.
#54 to #49 - anonymous (07/25/2014) [-]
Some service providers trying to cut down on porn, gore and suicide sites etc in attempts to prevent "accidental viewing" and underage viewers you now have to OPT IN when signing up to some bigger ones. Its not as bad as OP makes it sound, its just a check box usually to access adult content online.
#90 - reaperriley (07/25/2014) [-]
>MFW reading this as a murrican.
#22 - dodosareextinct (07/24/2014) [+] (10 replies)
#6: Why the **** don't Europeans put screens on their windows? Honestly.
User avatar #110 - owemiegawd (07/25/2014) [-]
i love it when things are so hilarious that i constantly.
#12 - fillthisspace (07/24/2014) [+] (2 replies)
I only have asda smartprice teabags
User avatar #88 - yojo (07/25/2014) [-]
#13 to an American sounds like something in a "first world problems" comp to a Kenyan.
User avatar #87 - emppilaf ONLINE (07/25/2014) [-]
I remember when I found out New England wasn't part of England....

Ah yes last week was pretty stressful altogether .....
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