So Steve and me walk into a sushi place. After being seated, a cute redhead waitress comes up to take our drink order. Waitress, obviously flirting it up, talking to us. Me, always liking to ruin things, spend the time making gay comments whenever she walks by our table to make her think we're gay (which neither of us are). Meal winding down, Steve says "Dammit man, I really wanted her number. She probably thinks we're a couple now." I smile and say, "You want her number? Juse go for a smoke when she brings the check. I'll pay." Waitress brings check. Steve hops up on time and says he's going for a smoke. I pay in cash. As she brings my change, this is what I say.
"Hey, I'm sorry, I really hope I didn't offend you earlier. See, I'm Steve's only gay friend, so I like to make him SUPER uncomfortable whenever we hang out. He actually really wanted your number, but he was too embarressed to ask. So, I thought, maybe I could get your number to make it up to him?"
And it worked.
Steve's conclusion? Best. Wingman. EVER.
