Merry Holiday. Source: tumblr subscribe for more. almoast' H Source: leon art) blissy: I love working at amazon during the holidays because you get to see all o tumblr funny holidays
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Merry Holiday

Merry Holiday. Source: tumblr subscribe for more. almoast' H Source: leon art) blissy: I love working at amazon during the holidays because you get to see all o

Source: tumblr
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almoast' H Source:
leon art) blissy:
I love working at amazon during the holidays because you get to see
all of the things people order tor Christmas. It' s tun thinking that the
little froggy raincoats you just shipped out will make some toddler
miles away squeal with delight, or the earrings you just stuck in a box
will earn a kiss.
out then you box a huge black dildo shaped like a fist.
well to be fair that' ll make someone squeal too
aww #amazon #christmas # ****
smut notes at
...
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Views: 40193
Favorited: 58
Submitted: 12/29/2013
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Comments(106):

[ 106 comments ]
What do you think? Give us your opinion. Anonymous comments allowed.
#7 - danzey (12/30/2013) [-]
Curious as to whether amazon sell dildos i searched the uk site for "dildo" and it came back with these :
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-Vindaloo Strength To Ease Any Post-Curry House Anal Meltdown
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#9 to #7 - John Cena (12/30/2013) [-]
In the US they do.
User avatar #26 to #7 - gabek (12/30/2013) [-]
I have a gentlemans ball scratcher 10/10 recommend.
User avatar #28 to #7 - Nameloc (12/30/2013) [-]
Search Doc Johnson.
They're practically the #1 selling dildo maker on Amazon.

Every one of my coworkers has come across a Doc Johnson item before.
User avatar #46 to #28 - heartlessrobot (12/30/2013) [-]
I wish I could afford one. Apparently, with shipping, I can't afford a 5 dollar dildo.
User avatar #42 to #7 - childpls ONLINE (12/30/2013) [-]
I want the rainbow willy warmer
#74 to #7 - gongthehawkeye (12/30/2013) [-]
"Brings out the animal in ewe"
User avatar #12 to #7 - duhusst (12/30/2013) [-]
Oh god, I click on all those links, I'll never be able to get on Amazon with anyone in the room again...
User avatar #30 to #12 - Nameloc (12/30/2013) [-]
AND THEN THERE'S THE RELATED SEARCHES
#17 to #7 - smashingprodigy (12/30/2013) [-]
I love the reviews for the inflatable sheep.   
   
"I got this because the courts now won't allow me within 50yds of real sheep anymore and I have to say, it was nothing like a real sheep, its so bad I am thinking about re-training as a vet just to get some action."
I love the reviews for the inflatable sheep.

"I got this because the courts now won't allow me within 50yds of real sheep anymore and I have to say, it was nothing like a real sheep, its so bad I am thinking about re-training as a vet just to get some action."
User avatar #67 to #17 - mitchr (12/30/2013) [-]
"My Welsh friend loves it!"
User avatar #33 - manofparody (12/30/2013) [-]
Worked at an Amazon Fulfillment Center (SDF8)
My county was in a state of emergency and they didn't excuse me from work. **** them.

Anyways, the weirdest thing I've ever seen there was in the transship area, and it was an assortment of butt plugs.. The problem was, the butt plugs got to sizes bigger than my hand, and struck fear into me.
User avatar #47 to #33 - heartlessrobot (12/30/2013) [-]
At least you don't ship for bad dragon.
User avatar #96 to #33 - biggydy (12/30/2013) [-]
Where do you live?
User avatar #104 to #96 - manofparody (12/30/2013) [-]
Southern Indiana, on the border of Kentucky.
User avatar #106 to #104 - biggydy (12/31/2013) [-]
OOH COUNTY, **** i read it as country and i thought that there was some sort of civil war or stuff going on and they made you work anyways.
User avatar #10 - lyiat ONLINE (12/30/2013) [-]
Worked for Amazon as a picker for four weeks. **** that place. Seriously. Their physical demands actually cause employees to suffer PTSD.
User avatar #29 to #10 - Nameloc (12/30/2013) [-]
What was your best rate?

I'm a picker, and it's decent.
I can keep a rate of 108 for a week. 115 is the "100% mark."
I even zone out completely and keep a decent rate... With PPmulti-large.
User avatar #32 to #29 - lyiat ONLINE (12/30/2013) [-]
Best rate was 108% for singles smalls, which 'was the minimum I could do and unacceptable'.
User avatar #35 to #32 - Nameloc (12/30/2013) [-]
....
Were you an Amazonian or Integrity?

Also, which location? I work at the RIC2 location in Virginia.
One guy I talked to, was written up on his training day because he wasn't keeping rate. Even though your first week, rate doesn't matter.
User avatar #37 to #35 - lyiat ONLINE (12/30/2013) [-]
As a double note, our manager was demanding that everyone get to 140%.
User avatar #38 to #37 - Nameloc (12/30/2013) [-]
Damn, so you never even got the $2,000 offer to quit?
Also, that 140% is serious BS.

At the place I work at, Peak was intense.
800+ people working the same shift at any given time. (We went from 2,500 to 6,500. 4,000 integrity...)
The only reason why RIC2 did so well was because they over-hired. I can't state how much they over-hired.
The entire group rate was under 85, until last week, because there was just too many people.
We even shut down for 20-40 minutes on black friday AND cyber monday since we picked so much and pack couldn't keep up.
User avatar #39 to #38 - lyiat ONLINE (12/30/2013) [-]
Ha! I wish SMX had that sort of offer. No, we had a contract that said we could be terminated at any given point in time for any reason. My state isn't a right to work state. If that had existed, I would have stayed on until I got the 2k.

Our group rate was hovering around eighty as well, which had the managers pissed off at everyone.
User avatar #44 to #39 - Nameloc (12/30/2013) [-]
It's Commitment To Serve. CTS.
Apparently every Amazonian is offered it within their first month. It was $3k. If you started off as integrity/ temporary, then they wouldn't offer it to you unless you switched over and became full time.

I too, had to sign the "at will" document.

Say, did yours have a "Swag Shop" with "SMX Bucks"?
I've got RIC Bucks for the Swag Shop in RIC2.
User avatar #45 to #44 - lyiat ONLINE (12/30/2013) [-]
They implemented it for Amazonians only the week I started. "Boss Bucks"
User avatar #36 to #35 - lyiat ONLINE (12/30/2013) [-]
We have a different program, but I didn't make Amazonian I can tell you that much. As black friday got closer, I ended up saying ' **** this' and never went back to work. I'm not going to bust my ass off and have to spend the next three days in bed with a slight limp and be told that I'm not working hard enough. **** that.
User avatar #34 to #32 - lyiat ONLINE (12/30/2013) [-]
I think that was somewhere in the ballpack of 180-190 items. Also, keep in mind I worked in one of the oldest warehouses with a single level and not any of the new neat toys some of the other locations have.
User avatar #54 to #10 - tealcanaan ONLINE (12/30/2013) [-]
"PTSD"
User avatar #105 to #54 - lyiat ONLINE (12/30/2013) [-]
... Yes. PTSD. Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder. You know, the thing ******* soldiers get.
User avatar #107 to #105 - tealcanaan ONLINE (12/31/2013) [-]
Ya i know i was just moking your overt hyperbolic use of it...
User avatar #108 to #107 - lyiat ONLINE (12/31/2013) [-]
I'm not exaggerating. I'm being deadly serious. People working at Amazon have suffered PTSD and other mental breakdowns from the overwhelming workload.
#73 to #10 - gongthehawkeye (12/30/2013) [-]
Pretty thick and strong dick.
#77 - anotheroneonearth ONLINE (12/30/2013) [-]
someone's FW
someone's FW
#20 - finblob (12/30/2013) [-]
**finblob rolled a random image posted in comment #59 at I'm glad I'm not the only one ** my favourite kind of dildo
#51 to #20 - tigerblade (12/30/2013) [-]
**tigerblade rolled a random image posted in comment #63 at Poll time, friends ** I can't live a day without this dildo.
**tigerblade rolled a random image posted in comment #63 at Poll time, friends ** I can't live a day without this dildo.
0
#52 to #51 - finblob has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #21 to #20 - finblob (12/30/2013) [-]
I have issues, ok?
#69 - lolpictures (12/30/2013) [-]
My sister ordered these for her son from amazon....
#81 to #69 - ironsoul (12/30/2013) [-]
She also ordered the dildo.
She also ordered the dildo.
#85 to #81 - weirdweir (12/30/2013) [-]
for her son
#94 to #85 - lolpictures (12/30/2013) [-]
Hes only one year old...
Hes only one year old...
#99 to #94 - weirdweir (12/30/2013) [-]
they start so young
User avatar #92 to #69 - melontwilight (12/30/2013) [-]
Ok but did he squeal with delight?
#31 - FRAMIUS (12/30/2013) [-]
**FRAMIUS rolled a random image posted in comment #300338 at Friendly **
Best gift
#4 - traveltech (12/30/2013) [-]
**traveltech rolled a random image posted in comment #3 at History Wins Again **
What comes in the mail for me
#19 to #4 - chiefbonebiter (12/30/2013) [-]
So you bought yourself a ****** ?
good choise
User avatar #89 to #19 - traveltech (12/30/2013) [-]
I was surprised to learn that you can still buy them
#15 - smashingprodigy (12/30/2013) [-]
**smashingprodigy rolled a random image posted in comment #6996471 at Safe For Work Random Board ** What I got from Amazon.
**smashingprodigy rolled a random image posted in comment #6996471 at Safe For Work Random Board ** What I got from Amazon.
#16 to #15 - smashingprodigy (12/30/2013) [-]
What the hell is going on?
What the hell is going on?
User avatar #18 to #16 - neonnurse (12/30/2013) [-]
It's a show on cartoon network's adult swim called "Rick and Morty" basically Rick is the kid Morty's grandfather who is essentially a drunk genius who constantly takes Morty on adventures to other planets, universes, dimensions, peoples' minds and dreams, etc. In this scene Morty is freaking the **** out trying to say how bad the situation is to Rick, who's to drunk to give two ***** at the moment.
User avatar #61 to #18 - smashingprodigy (12/30/2013) [-]
Thank you. I think I might check it out.
User avatar #86 - kingofhazard (12/30/2013) [-]
They sell those on amazon?
#11 - mrdrpage (12/30/2013) [-]
**mrdrpage rolled a random image posted in comment #3 at They burn so easily... ** What I get from Amazon.
#3 - imagnetsux (12/30/2013) [-]
**imagnetsux rolled a random image posted in comment #1 at Thanksgiving, not for everyone ** what i got
#53 - redbannerman (12/30/2013) [-]
This image has expired
Who wants to thumb me down? I want to reach lvl 0 again so I can climb once more to where I currently am.


My body is ready.
User avatar #55 to #53 - fourtwentt ONLINE (12/30/2013) [-]
It'll be harder to reach zero than leveling up
#56 to #55 - redbannerman (12/30/2013) [-]
If people can reach -400 I can reach 0 damnit
User avatar #58 to #56 - fourtwentt ONLINE (12/30/2013) [-]
Well you're two red thumbs closer
User avatar #64 to #58 - lecorbi (12/30/2013) [-]
BAHAHA I thumbed him up
User avatar #76 to #64 - brcstar (12/30/2013) [-]
I did too
#68 to #53 - taurusguy (12/30/2013) [-]
Not too much of a climb.
#2 - John Cena (12/30/2013) [-]
************ how do you find this stuff so easily? its hilarious everytime!
#8 - John Cena (12/30/2013) [-]
#60 to #8 - superblade (12/30/2013) [-]
as a mind blower i come to no where with A shotgun AND BLOW THE **** OUT OF YOU
#103 to #60 - John Cena (12/30/2013) [-]
I paid 60 dollars for this?!?
#72 to #8 - nemula (12/30/2013) [-]
Comment Picture
#48 to #8 - suikerpapa (12/30/2013) [-]
As post master, I decide that this post is funny and that you are a faggot.   
   
I too, take my job seriously
As post master, I decide that this post is funny and that you are a faggot.

I too, take my job seriously
#65 to #8 - toomuchfj (12/30/2013) [-]
Comment Picture
#23 to #8 - ichies (12/30/2013) [-]
(Level 192 Comments: Anon Annihilator)   
   
I will take my job seriously!
(Level 192 Comments: Anon Annihilator)

I will take my job seriously!
#66 to #23 - mitchr (12/30/2013) [-]
You've been promoted. Congratulations.   
Take this gif as your reward. And use it well.
You've been promoted. Congratulations.
Take this gif as your reward. And use it well.
User avatar #63 to #23 - chiopet (12/30/2013) [-]
you have done well, my child. one day you too shall reach the level of "comedic genius"
#98 - spanishninja (12/30/2013) [-]
**spanishninja rolled a random image posted in comment #7051194 at Safe For Work Random Board **
what i got for christmas
User avatar #100 to #98 - madsenos (12/30/2013) [-]
you poor soul..
#101 to #100 - spanishninja (12/30/2013) [-]
the roll gods have spoken
User avatar #102 to #101 - madsenos (12/30/2013) [-]
are you enlightened yet?
User avatar #97 - Loppytaffy (12/30/2013) [-]
I want some froggy wellies...
#95 - metalnettle (12/30/2013) [-]
**metalnettle rolled a random image posted in comment #17 at I hope he's a princess ** what I ordered from amazon
#75 - jazzyietheferret (12/30/2013) [-]
**jazzyietheferret rolled a random image posted in comment #120 at something about tattoos ** what I got from Amazon.
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