(this is in reply to #569) don't think like that - #83185639 added by ringobyjingo at Counting Stars

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#186 - Kairyuka

Reply+34

(02/06/2013)[-]

Story of my life. Except for the good ending. And the paper stars. And the "being a girl" thing.

#345 to #186 - ringobyjingo

Reply0

(02/06/2013)[-]

I'd be your friend! I like friends!

#415 to #345 - Kairyuka

Reply0

(02/06/2013)[-]

I like friends too, and I have some online friends. No real real life friends though. For some reason, that never works out.

#439 to #415 - ringobyjingo

Reply+1

(02/06/2013)[-]

It'll be ok!!! I shall hug you!!!!

#490 to #439 - ringobyjingo

Reply0

(02/06/2013)[-]

awww my gif broke :(

#445 to #439 - Kairyuka

Reply0

(02/06/2013)[-]

Thanks man. It's something alright.
So, wanna be internet friends? I don't give viruses c:

#457 to #445 - ringobyjingo

Reply0

(02/06/2013)[-]

yeah :) I'm not good at responding to things in a timely manner but yay friends!!!

#461 to #457 - Kairyuka

Reply0

(02/06/2013)[-]

Yay~
So what do you like to do? What do you spend your time on?

#473 to #461 - ringobyjingo

Reply0

(02/06/2013)[-]

I feel like since I know you're a boy I should tell you the fact that I'm a girl so you don't think I'm weird sometimes if something I do is girly.. I like chilling and I spend a LOT of time in school... I'm studying to be a vet tech cuz animals are awesome!!!

#481 to #473 - Kairyuka

Reply0

(02/06/2013)[-]

Ooh, vet huh? My grandpa was a pretty damn good vet. It's a quite awesome profession.
What do you do in your spare time? Hobbies, passions, anything?

#486 to #481 - ringobyjingo

Reply0

(02/06/2013)[-]

not a whole lot.... hang out with my boyfriend whos basically the only person I hang out with now because all of my other friends left for college and some are changing.... and watch tv... i spend a lot of time on the internet mostly, and sleep... I like watching adventure time :) you?

#492 to #486 - Kairyuka

Reply0

(02/06/2013)[-]

I spend most of my time on music, or on the internet, watching videos and browsing sites like these. When I'm not in school, that is. I don't spend time with friends because I don't really have any. I guess it'll get better some day though.
I'm also really bipolar, mostly due to my sub-par social qualities and my stupid affection for love- and romance stories. But I get through somehow.

#506 to #492 - ringobyjingo

Reply+1

(02/06/2013)[-]

awwwww! don't worry buddy it will get better! :) and I can tell you that the right girl will like you for you affection of love and romance stories :) and if she doesn't she needs to grow up and stop dating douches... in the end every girl wants someone romantic :) also i like to draw random thing... i forgot that i do because i've been so busy... i draw a lot when i'm really happy and have a lot of time on my hands because i'm kinda a perfectionist and like things to look the way they do in my mind when i decide what i want to draw, also i'm sorry i don't capitalize my i's.... i'm lazy... i'm not much of a reader because i think i might be a bit dyslexic... it takes me a long time to read things so i don't find it very fun... unless it's harry potter... :) that's the only book series i could get myself to actually sit down and take the time to read!!! pic related it's one of my drawings :) (i'm not usually one to write "U no" in fact it bugs me when people do that... but it was 4 am when i drew this and like 3 years ago.. i like drawing cartoon characters and can draw a lot freehand without looking at a picture :) the zim and gir were freehand but the others i'd never drawn before and had to look at pictures... i really like drawing timon from the lion king and gir :) they're my favorites!!!

#514 to #506 - Kairyuka

Reply0

(02/06/2013)[-]

Thanks for the reassuring words, it bears more weight when it's coming from a girl. It's still pretty simple to just call myself a romantic, when the truth is more like that I'm just kinda unlikable, but I guess that's just how it's gonna be.
You're pretty good at drawing too, I can definitely see experience and confidence in your lines. I wish I'd practiced drawing more, some times I just get a really good picture in my head, but I'm unable to draw it. That's really frustrating.

#532 to #514 - ringobyjingo

Reply0

(02/06/2013)[-]

also don't just give up :) it took me until very recently to get in a relationship and i was about ready to give up too!!! but you know what??? he found me and we're so happy!! he's interested in all the things i am and i found him by being his friend first... try to show off the things you love and what makes you happy, people will see that and start wanting to talk about it with you and who knows!!! one of them might be a girl ;) i can promise you only the dumb girls don't date their friends :) because the nice ones know that's where the best guys come from!!! so i think your first thing you should do is be happy with who you are and don't be shy about showing off stuff you own that kinda shows what you're interested in? don't try to just blend in.. be yourself! it makes it easier for people to be your friend if they know you like somehting even if you think others might think it's weird.. who needs them??? they're assholes!!!

#559 to #532 - Kairyuka

Reply0

(02/07/2013)[-]

But you see, there's a difference to "being yourself". What turned out well for you, is not turning out well for me, most likely because at some level, I really am a horrible person, or worse yet, a boring person. So when I try to be myself, I end up alone. No friends, no lovers, nothing. Completely alone. So I just ignore it, like I've always done. Trouble is, I came across this romantic visual novel called Katawa Shoujo, and the realism and writing of the love stories almost convinced me that I could have that too. Silly, I know.
So basically, I'm just ignoring the lingering feelings in the back of my head. They don't really serve any purpose, and they cause me to only write angsty song lyrics.
And I'd say my favorite bands are either rock or metal, but I have some different preferences too, like a capella, funk, disco, ska and such. Ever heard Poets of the Fall? Marko Saaresto is the most amazing vocalist in the world, and they write lyrics of things I wish I could hear or say one day. So I really love them. Also Maximum the Hormone just for the lulz. Everything they make is just gold and awesomeness.

#564 to #559 - ringobyjingo

Reply0

(02/07/2013)[-]

No i've never heard of those bands but I will check them out :) and no it's not silly that you feel that way! have you ever tried playing your songs for people? either just randomly at your school or as an actual performer? you might be able to find some people who want to be your friend that way :) i see a lot of people sitting at outside tables at my school strumming their guitar and singing songs :) and if you don't wanna sing YOUR songs maybe sing some covers of your favorites :) then if anyone knows the band it might start a conversation :)

#565 to #564 - Kairyuka

Reply0

(02/07/2013)[-]

Nah, if I sit with a guitar I just sit. Playing. No one approaches, no one asks. That's just how it is, and that's how it's always been.
Also, having thoughts about love and romance IS silly when you have literally no experience and no appealing qualities. It's certainly a dream, but if it's a dream I can't influence, it doesn't matter.
It's been so long since I've had a hug that I've forgot how it feels. How would I ever hold someone in my arms, when I'm like that? It's ridiculous and retarded, things like that only come true in fiction. But it doesn't matter. No one said you can't live without being happy.

#566 to #565 - ringobyjingo

Reply0

(02/07/2013)[-]

awww :( i'd hug you! everyone needs hugs!!! maybe if you don't try to please others and just spend all of your time pleasing yourself you'll be happy :) i'm not sure if you're one of those people who actually does try to please others too much but if you are, try doing more what makes you happy :) that's the first step, also, i technically did give up on trying to find someone who would like me after being turned down so many times, but right after i stopped trying, someone came to me... i think it's cuz i finally took time to do the things that make ME happy and someone saw that and was like "she seems like a happy girl!!! i wonder what it's like to date her!??!" so i guess what i'm saying is try to just make yourself happy :) everyone has someone out there, but that person doesn't wanna come out to someone who's sad, that's a little scary for some girls to see a guy sad.. not sure why... i think when someones sad they just need someone they can call a friend!!!

#567 to #566 - Kairyuka

Reply0

(02/07/2013)[-]

That's just the thing. That's how I used to live. That's what I used to do. And the final result is that I'm completely alone. While everyone else has fun together and share love and happiness, I'm left completely alone with only the material things I love left. Every person I've loved or trusted just turned out to be faking. To not care. That's just how I am, apparently. A guy you FAKE your emotions towards because of pity or politeness. I hate it. But my social facade is still pretty strong, so no one suspects my real feelings. Or care. One or the other.
Also, excuse me for saying it, but women are socially superior, just by being women. I don't want it to be true, but it is.

#586 to #567 - ringobyjingo

Reply0

(02/11/2013)[-]

but don't ever think for one second that life would be better without you... you need to be more optomistic or you literally will never have fun in life... it makes me sad that you never just think "maybe" because life would be a lot easier for you if you would believe in yourself :(

#587 to #586 - ringobyjingo

(02/11/2013)[-]

i believe in you...

#585 to #567 - ringobyjingo

Reply0

(02/11/2013)[-]

No! no one would be better off without you!!! what about your family??? aren't they your friends?

#583 to #567 - ringobyjingo

Reply0

(02/09/2013)[-]

some day you might :)

#584 to #583 - Kairyuka

(02/09/2013)[-]

Nah I doubt it. But it's okay, I've got my computer and my guitar, and there's nothing or no one for me out there. I can always just use my imagination and keep to myself in a dream world where my ideals aren't ridiculous. So that's what I'll do. It's not like others will care, I think people will be better off without me.

#581 to #567 - ringobyjingo

Reply0

(02/09/2013)[-]

well you do what makes you happy :) who knows... maybe one of your online friends lives close by and COULD BE an irl friend!?? :)

#582 to #581 - Kairyuka

(02/09/2013)[-]

I have no friends inside this country's borders.

#578 to #567 - ringobyjingo

Reply0

(02/09/2013)[-]

well here's an idea.. think of your internet friends as real friends :) they may not be close but we care about you!! :) we all want you to be happy!! and if you wanted... try online dating!! my cousin has done that many times and has found great guys from it, true it took a while to find "the one" but right now.. she thinks she's found him and they met online :) not on a dating website.. just.. the internet! sure that can be shady... but sometimes it's good :) but no matter what, think of all of us internet friends as your friends :) not the shallow ones! the real ones!!! :)

#579 to #578 - Kairyuka

(02/09/2013)[-]

I do. Still would be nice to have someone to hang out with irl. But I guess I'm not suited for that kinda stuff. And I don't think I'll try online dating services. It's not that effective actually, not compared to frequenting forums or playing MMO's. None of which I do, of course.

#575 to #567 - ringobyjingo

Reply0

(02/08/2013)[-]

also here's a cute doggie :) hopefully it brings a smile to your face because you seem to need one :)

#576 to #575 - Kairyuka

(02/08/2013)[-]

I wish I could believe that, but sadly, that's not what I see in my life. Oh well, thanks for the encouragement, I don't really believe in it, but I'm happy you're trying to cheer me up a bit. As I said, I've recently chosen to just not care. To pack away my feelings. Maybe then I could get some shallow friendships, that's at least an illusion of friendship.
Everyone I meet just serve to confirm my suspicions that I don't belong anywhere. So why should I act like I care? I can just sit on the internet or play with my guitar instead.

#574 to #567 - ringobyjingo

Reply+1

(02/08/2013)[-]

also if it helps, I think you sound like a nice guy :) and i know a couple of my friends that would totally date you!!! i don't know a lot about you but your picture that started this whole conversation was anime and so you must like anime :) one of my best friends is an anime fan and she's into things that you sound like you are :) so trust me... there are girls out there like her, i've met a lot of them!!! so don't give up hope :) i'd be your friend and i know my friends would too!!! and we're really not that special we're all just kinda goofy people who do what makes us happy.. basically what i'm saying is that i'm pretty sure there are girls out there who would like you and a bunch of guys who would be your friend

#573 to #567 - ringobyjingo

Reply0

(02/08/2013)[-]

it wont let me reply... :P well i'm sure you're good. and you'd be surprised how many people who recognize you and spend time with you through your band and stuff might actually consider you a friend? and this isn't the end.. no matter what you think it might ba AN end.. but it's not THE end... and everything will be ok in THE end!!!! here's a quote that i like :) : "everything is ok in the end, if it isn't ok, then it isn't the end" that means that as much as something might seem like the end it is not unless its ok because we're young (probably... i'm assuming you are) and stuff that seems like the end of the world .. its not :)

#570 to #567 - ringobyjingo

Reply0

(02/07/2013)[-]

(this is in reply to #569) don't think like that :) no one should live a sad life :) you only have a short time on earth and you deserve to make it what you want!!! i promise... everything will get better :) just look on the happy side of life!! if you're in a band... AND you are going to play live soon.. that means you my friend... are a good musician!!! and not a lot of people are!!! so that's pretty big!! :) look at you! making music and stuff! and i know life sucks right now but it will get better... and it might also make for good music ;) angsty music is some of the best :) haha but i promise... life seems bad but it will be ok in the end!!!

#571 to #570 - Kairyuka

(02/07/2013)[-]

I keep getting that. "It'll be okay in the end". Well I've seen some ends in my time. Never a good end. Always just an end where I'm worse off than before.
Also, playing in a band doesn't mean that I'm a good musician, it's all a program to help aspiring artists with original music. So it's just because I pay them money, it's not because I've got any talent whatsoever.
I don't meet new people that often, and those I do meet become better friends with my other "friends" than with me. I'm just that guy everyone recognizes, but no one is really friends with. And no one has had any romantic interest in. So it doesn't really matter. I can play my guitar from here until doomsday and it won't change a goddamn thing.
So I'm out. Good run folks. I'll just get a good job, earn some good money, buy electronics, distract myself with material things and silly hobbies until I die.

#568 to #567 - ringobyjingo

Reply0

(02/07/2013)[-]

yeah that's true i guess... women kinda are , i can vouch for that... hmmmm.. well have you tried signing up for clubs or things at school? stuff you're interested in? like anime club or band? we had those at my high school.. i'm not sure if they'd have them wherever you go but maybe?

#569 to #568 - Kairyuka

(02/07/2013)[-]

No clubs where I am, I'm afraid. I'm in a band and we're probably going to play live soon, but that won't change anything. If anything, it'll give everyone a completely wrong image of who I am, due to stereotyping within musical genres.
But recently, I've chosen to just give it up. Let it go. It doesn't matter, if I say it doesn't matter. Sure, it'd be nice to feel the warmth of someone else once... but it doesn't matter. I can distract myself for an entire lifetime, it's fine.

#520 to #514 - ringobyjingo

Reply0

(02/06/2013)[-]

thanks a lot!!! i can't draw realistically... sometimes i wish i could but its just never been that way.. what about you do you think is unlikable??? i think as long as you hold yourself in a way that you find yourself most comfortable and happy then you'll seem confident to the people around you and you'll find people who want to spend time with you and care :) and what kind of music do you like??? i like the beatles :) they're my favorite band of all time and nothing will ever change that!!!!

#513 to #506 - ringobyjingo

Reply+1

(02/06/2013)[-]

here's timon :) completely freehand :) and jojo from horton hears a who because it was a pretty cute movie and he gave me some feels, this one's also pretty old..

#511 to #506 - ringobyjingo

Reply0

(02/06/2013)[-]

but i'm not like one of those "omg 90s kids!!!" person i just like the nostalgia of drawing cartoons from my childhood :) i still like spongebob i just miss all the cartoons :( i wish nickelodeon still at least had cartoons... but i did like drake and josh :) don't get me wrong and icarly wasn't bad :) but i just miss my childhood sometimes

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