Carolean feels. Got mitt uns. 16 years old 2: -Just married the love of my life is prego is rough but nice iwork the fields eeat porridge all the time mean ALL  varan konung har talat
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Carolean feels

16 years old
2: -Just married the love of my life
is prego
is rough but nice
iwork the fields
eeat porridge all the time
mean ALL the time
has in I have nayer eaten
anything else since I stopped
being breastfed
Phreaking love porridge
day the king' s men come to my village
tell us we are at war with Denmark, Norway, Germany, Russia and
up all the males
epick every 10th in lines
get picked
gget told to pack my things
to war
it never changes
fiight all over europe, defending my home
2: -see eight out of my nine friends die by ******** themselves to death
tthe ninth guy gets shot by Ivan
bbe in constant agony for over fifteen years
ikill people
asit in russian internment camp
do it all for my family and my country
need to keep them safe
fiinally escape after I strangle the guard to death with one of my cellmates
tounges
pstart walking
AWALK back to my homeland
months later
in Stockholm
mu is scorched by russian raiders
appearently we are going to invade Norway new
balance at the road back to my village befire I volounteer to the officers
in norway sucks
bbetter than russia though
bbe laying in trench around fort
king approaching with his entourage
yhe approaches me and sits down next to me, looking over the top
am about to tell him to put his ******* head down but realise he is the
king
yhe looks at me with an amused look on his face
Don' t be scared my fria-"
jkings head
yhis brains are all over me
tthe bodyguards carry him away
two years later
arrive at my farm
mthree quarters of the army never made it back through the mountains
lost my right hand
awalk up to the door and call for my wife
man answers the door
chear babies crying in the background
2: -see my wife carrying a small child
sshe jumps when she sees me
tbells me to go away
tthe man starts to shut the door
vwhen the door is almost closed [scream at her to tell me where my child is
sshe says my sen died fighting in Finland last year
wlecome homeless in Stockholm
gget stabbed and robbed by street kids
llook up into the stars
out in the cold winter night
MMFW I lest my hand, my youth, my marriage, my sen and my innocence
fighting for my country
MMFW I remember all whe did the same
MMFW I would gladly do it again
MMFW my countrymen 300 years later spit on the memery of me, calling me
a worldkiller and a racist
...
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Views: 12966
Favorited: 22
Submitted: 03/31/2014
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#59 - davidteninch (04/01/2014) [-]
Just gonna point out it was Prussia, not Germany as the country hadn't formed, who declared war with everyone else on Sweden.

Still a lovely greentext whitetext though.
User avatar #60 to #59 - sesamfan (04/01/2014) [-]
Yes I am aware, wrote this bad boy late at night so saxony, germany and prussia all sounded the same in my drunk ears
#61 to #59 - sesamfan (04/01/2014) [-]
And thank you!
And thank you!
#35 - John Cena (04/01/2014) [-]
Hor vart stridsrop, Gott Mit Uns.
#36 to #35 - infraredanus (04/01/2014) [-]
wasn't ******* logged in... whoops
User avatar #21 - sarcasticcelery (04/01/2014) [-]
historiexplain
User avatar #22 to #21 - historiexplain (04/01/2014) [-]
Carl XII of Sweden was attacked by a triple alliance of Denmark–Norway, Saxony–Poland–Lithuania and Russia, as Carl was just 15 at the time and Sweden was a superpower that Russia disliked.

Carl defeated all of his opponents apart from Russia. Unfortunately his March on Moscow ended in defeat, him effectively losing the crown, the end of the Swedish Empire, and the occupation of a lot of Scandinavia

He returned though, and reclaimed his throne, and invaded Norway. He was subsequently killed in battle (no one knows by who-his own men, the enemy, a conspiracy by his sister), and the majority of the army was killed in a terrible snowstorm.

He is partly in disgrace due to Swedish Nazis (and Hitler himself) regarding him as a great hero
#32 to #22 - rogermannen (04/01/2014) [-]
"Fredriksten festning" in Halden aka The place where Carl XII died, is just 20 min from where i live.

The fortress he was besiegieng was basically impenetrable at the time and it was built so well that most of it still stands strong to this day. As it is built on top of a mountain half of it is surrounded by steep hills that made it almost impossible for troops to advance on, and the other half had cover from other forts that were strategically placed around it to fire on any attackers. And if they should somehow get past all those obstacles they would still have to cross a ton of ditches and avoid getting shot from the battlements as the fortress is star shaped which makes it impossible to find any cover near the walls.

This is just a picture of the front, the fortress itself stretches far out on the other side.

User avatar #27 to #22 - historiexplain (04/01/2014) [-]
-whiteshadow
User avatar #24 to #21 - historiexplain (04/01/2014) [-]
What is being described here is the events of the Great Northern War through the eyes of one of the soldiers. The war was between the Swedes (which was a major world power back in the 17-18th century) and the Norwegians/Russians/Saxons. It began when Peter the Great and his cronies from Denmark-Norwayand Saxony-Poland-Lituania contested the supremacy of Charles the 12th (of the swedish empire) The war lasted 21 years and was pretty terrible for the Swedish empire, as they lost their king, and 200,000 people, and 250,00 square miles, a long with major cities with advantages such as ports and strategic locations.
User avatar #25 to #24 - historiexplain (04/01/2014) [-]
-batman
#3 - hirollin (04/01/2014) [-]
I'm impressed, but I don't fully understand. Who was the guy? Is there some real world occurrence that has happened recently that is making this relevant?
I'm impressed, but I don't fully understand. Who was the guy? Is there some real world occurrence that has happened recently that is making this relevant?
#4 to #3 - sesamfan (04/01/2014) [-]
Basically the great northern war was a testiment to will of swedish soldiers to serve their king without question. They went through all matter of 			****		 and achieved victories that are just absurd like at Narva, Fraustadt and the like.     
   
When I was growing up all we learned of the soldier during the imperial time was that he was a religious maniac that hated everyone and wanted nothing but to plunder and pillage the poor russians and poles. Also the imperial times are basically skipped in the history lessons even though it is a major part of our history and explains the policy of neutrality we have had the last two centuries. The great northern war alone killed off almost 1/5 of our male population.   
   
The character is completely made up, but I might make more stories about him though.
Basically the great northern war was a testiment to will of swedish soldiers to serve their king without question. They went through all matter of **** and achieved victories that are just absurd like at Narva, Fraustadt and the like.

When I was growing up all we learned of the soldier during the imperial time was that he was a religious maniac that hated everyone and wanted nothing but to plunder and pillage the poor russians and poles. Also the imperial times are basically skipped in the history lessons even though it is a major part of our history and explains the policy of neutrality we have had the last two centuries. The great northern war alone killed off almost 1/5 of our male population.

The character is completely made up, but I might make more stories about him though.
User avatar #5 to #4 - sesamfan (04/01/2014) [-]
pic sort of related, only swedish army related thing I have
#28 to #5 - sqook (04/01/2014) [-]
Amfibiekåren, deal with it!
#19 - John Cena (04/01/2014) [-]
>mfw you did it all so jews could turn your countrymen into this
#10 - John Cena (04/01/2014) [-]
You ******* suck this is ****
User avatar #7 - husidusidu (04/01/2014) [-]
Look at all those pseudo patriots without experience in war. Sweden evolved. People become crazy during wars, there is nothing to be proud of, no matter at wich site of the trench you shoot. War sucks, nationalism sucks. Had to get used with it when I was 6, now it's your turn you proud pseudo patrios.
#58 - jdizzleoffthehizzl (04/01/2014) [-]
Well we've all been there
User avatar #57 - aabbccddeeffgghhii (04/01/2014) [-]
What really got me in this was "Apparently we are invading Norway now"

All that **** that went on. All the deaths, war and miles marched/backtracked and they still invaded Norway for reasons the troops probably didn't understand. How the **** was that even possible to do with all the **** that was going on?

"Apparently." ******* sums up how pointless was is 90% of the time.
#49 - holyjebus (04/01/2014) [-]
This was a surprisingly good read, make moare!
User avatar #20 - ranzoray (04/01/2014) [-]
Question for OP, are blacks and muslims really a problem in Sweden, or is it all largely exaggeration?
User avatar #31 to #20 - ludvig (04/01/2014) [-]
Not only in Sweden, Denmark as well, whole scandinavia has been invaded by muslims. They cause alot of trouble. Not all of them, but most of them.
#13 - slesbian (04/01/2014) [-]
jokexplain halp
User avatar #17 to #13 - cppaulsson (04/01/2014) [-]
the king refferred to here is Karl XII, who the swedish nazis love. Noone feels he was a bad king in geneal though, and noone calls racist on the carolines, but te nazimovement keeps them as their ideal and use hem as symbolic figures for a great-sweden. i suspect from the last scentence that OP feels sad for people calling him a racist when i tries to strangle immigrants... no swedes think soldiers in the 18th century where more racist than any other white person in the world atthe time. actually, KarlXII had quite good connections with the turks and even brought cultural influences from there to sweden. there are also theories he was gay, so nazis liking him is kind of wierd. but then again nazis aren't very clever people
#14 to #13 - wrongexplain (04/01/2014) [-]
Swedes have big dicks
User avatar #8 - coinflipper (04/01/2014) [-]
jokexplain, do you know what's going on here?
User avatar #11 to #8 - moshimoshi (04/01/2014) [-]
I'll help instead. Sweden was a superpower back then, and like everybody declared war against us at once. Our king at the time was Karl XII, also known as "the hero king" or Carolus Rex. He drained Sweden of young males and went to war in Denmark, Poland, Ukraine, Norway etc etc. Long story short, we lost most of our land and Russia became the new superpower.

These days Karl XII is a important part of the neo-nazi imagery, make Sweden great again blah blah. As a consequence (paired with leftist propaganda) it's taboo to have positive feelings for our homeland, singing our national anthem or showing the swedish flag in any way. "What are you, A NAZI?!?"
#26 to #11 - John Cena (04/01/2014) [-]
> it's taboo to have positive feelings for our homeland, singing our national anthem or showing the swedish flag in any way

sounds familiar
User avatar #29 to #26 - achphoenix ONLINE (04/01/2014) [-]
its been the same in denmark since the muhammad drawings and the burning of the danish flag...
#15 to #11 - coinflipper (04/01/2014) [-]
I'm a swede myself, but only know realised it's about Karl XII.
Thanks for the explanation!

pic unrelated.
User avatar #12 to #11 - moshimoshi (04/01/2014) [-]
Damn, forgot to post this. Carolus Rex - Sabaton (swedish lyrics) www.youtube.com/watch?v=EPCcy4xBlwA
#38 to #11 - infraredanus (04/01/2014) [-]
Or you could just say its from a song about history/a battle and call it a day.
User avatar #6 - sinery (04/01/2014) [-]
Never heard of such an accusation the last sentence during my 18 year here.
#1 - drekker (04/01/2014) [-]
False, thirty years war happened from 1618-1648.
False, thirty years war happened from 1618-1648.
#30 to #1 - John Cena (04/01/2014) [-]
HE'S PROBABLY TALKING ABOUT THE GREAT NORTHERNWAR
#2 to #1 - sesamfan (04/01/2014) [-]
Great northern war broseph(1701-1721)
User avatar #9 to #2 - deadnanners (04/01/2014) [-]
are you swedish, because that guy in the picture needs to get on a boat with all his mates and get sunk in the middle of the atlantic
User avatar #33 to #9 - sesamfan (04/01/2014) [-]
>only swedish related picture that had a facepalm quality to it
#39 to #33 - infraredanus (04/01/2014) [-]
Considering the desc and the tags, this is referencing the Song Gott Mit Uns by Sabatron which is about the battle of Brietenfeld in southern Germany (I think) in 1631... So actually OP was right.
User avatar #63 to #39 - cppaulsson (04/02/2014) [-]
nope. i'm swedish, iv'e had these thingies in school since forever. OP is a nazi though, from the symbolism of the last part ( it has to do with the swedish nazimovement). it said "got mit uns" on the belts of the german soldiers during WWII (which is probably by those nationalist fags in Sabaton use it to, only they have made up a good excause) and by OPs obvious (to swedish peolpe) agenda in the story ( the king Karl XII and the carolines are used as symbols by the nazis, noone in sweden really dislikes that part of history, but as the nazis has such a hardon for them, they are a bit tabu-ish to use as symbols in other occassions)
#64 to #63 - infraredanus (04/02/2014) [-]
Its a reference to a song by Sabatron about the battle of Brietenfeld... 1631 appearently German was the language of choice for sweds to learn, sorta like in English we look to latin I guess. In case you didn't know, 1631 was before nazi's.
User avatar #65 to #64 - cppaulsson (04/02/2014) [-]
yes, nut in this context it's a nazi-refference. that was the 30-yearwar. in sweden the symbolism of this comic would go as subtle nazi-propaganda
User avatar #67 to #65 - cppaulsson (04/02/2014) [-]
the comic itself, not just got mit uns. and WE are after the nazis, if i'm not mistaken and some things are branded since they used it
#68 to #67 - infraredanus (04/02/2014) [-]
But how is something that happened in the 1700's have to do with something that happened in the 1930's-40's? I'm just confused about how they relate and how that makes OP a Nazi.
User avatar #69 to #68 - cppaulsson (04/02/2014) [-]
the swedish nazis have "destroyed" that part of our heritage by using it as symbolism in propaganda and so forth. As an example one swedish pro-nazi news-page uses a siluette of a caroline soldier as their logo, the nazis in sweden march through our capital and stand by the statue of the king in the comic making hitler-salutes, do i need so say more? the king itself was not more racist than any other european, more likely less, but the swastika wasn't a symbol of nazis before they used it either.
#70 to #69 - infraredanus (04/02/2014) [-]
huh, alrighty then. I guess I really have no say in this. I don't really want to get into an arguement between you and OP, sorry but at least I know both sides (unless op really isn't a nazi)
User avatar #71 to #70 - cppaulsson (04/02/2014) [-]
he's probably just going through a fase
User avatar #72 to #71 - cppaulsson (04/02/2014) [-]
that is one ugly-ass smiley...
#73 to #72 - infraredanus (04/02/2014) [-]
lol, also its spelled phase* btw.. eh i guess im a grammar... nazi.. eheh (that was a terrible joke im sorry)
User avatar #74 to #73 - cppaulsson (04/02/2014) [-]
i'm studying and it's called "fas" in swedish...it did seem so legit...best pun today though
#75 to #74 - infraredanus (04/02/2014) [-]
ehe thanks
User avatar #66 to #65 - cppaulsson (04/02/2014) [-]
but*
User avatar #41 to #39 - sesamfan (04/01/2014) [-]
Cool song, just decided to put it in the desc/tag for the heck of it. No troll, just wanted to see if anyone got it.

But yea the story is about the great northern war
#42 to #41 - infraredanus (04/01/2014) [-]
I stand corrected (as stated in the comment below) But yeah I love Sabatron, especially the Swedish version of his songs in Carolus Rex (thats Charles VII right? or something like that) and especially attempting to sing the songs in swedish, because sometimes is feels good to listen/sing to something different like in a different language... that and it sounds badass... Not my singing though, I suck.
User avatar #43 to #42 - sesamfan (04/01/2014) [-]
Haha I always cringe when I hear sabaton sing in english because the lyrics are so different from the swedish one. It doesn't make sense you know? so yea totally listen to the swedish version
#44 to #43 - infraredanus (04/01/2014) [-]
I'm not the same way as you, because I actually have no fucing clue what he is saying in Swedish. I did a google translate so I know the lyrics have differences... But I mean. Google translate doesn't translate perfectly. It makes sense for the lyric change though, because if you took the literal meaning/words from one language, it just wouldn't sound right when translated. Swedish Version sounds better to me just because A. its new and cool and B. because it was the original version, therefore words sound better together. Gott Mit Uns my friend. (Even though thats also German, does it mean the same in Swedish? how does that work?)
User avatar #45 to #44 - sesamfan (04/01/2014) [-]
German was the "trendy" language during the 17th century and also it was the battle cry for the lutherans during the 30yrs war.

But yea I feel it, what an amazing world we live in dude. We can listen to ANY music we want... it just makes me happy inside.
#46 to #45 - infraredanus (04/01/2014) [-]
I've always wanted to learn German as I am fascinated with German military history (because they easily have the most badass, followed closely behind Rome, sorry for you Sweds, I don't really know your history besides Minecraft and Ikea) And yeah about that music thing, its great... Until you have a certain brother who sits next to you and blast music like this: (Please let me link youtube) www.youtube.com/watch?v=kdemFfbS5H0
Just listen to the ******* lyrics.... Seriously. **** . Me.
#48 to #46 - sesamfan (04/01/2014) [-]
jesus man...
#50 to #48 - infraredanus (04/01/2014) [-]
^^^ every god ******* damn time...
#47 to #46 - infraredanus (04/01/2014) [-]
Although to be honest its kind of funny... It just sounds ****** and annoying
User avatar #51 to #47 - sesamfan (04/01/2014) [-]
Yea it's just... I have a headache and I didn't need that right now
#52 to #51 - infraredanus (04/01/2014) [-]
I have cause you serious trauma... I do apologize.
#53 to #52 - sesamfan (04/01/2014) [-]
A Carolean feels no pain! Don't worry about me!
User avatar #55 to #54 - sesamfan (04/01/2014) [-]
do you even lift, peasant filth? (sort of)
#56 to #55 - infraredanus (04/01/2014) [-]
*cries uncontrolably, gets left in the mud at Poltava) ;_;*
#40 to #39 - infraredanus (04/01/2014) [-]
Of course unless he really was just doing it for the trolls, then yes it probably is 1700's (this is before people start raging... Probably would get that anyways.)
User avatar #18 to #2 - cppaulsson (04/01/2014) [-]
SD-supporter eller inte?
User avatar #34 to #18 - sesamfan (04/01/2014) [-]
Nja, vet inte riktigt vart jag står på det politiska spektrumet. Å ena sidan är jag för ett starkt försvar---å andra sidan vill jag att Sverige skall vara öppet och involverat i omvärlden.

Kort och gott så länge partiet jag stödjer är demokratiskt och inte vill banta det anorektiska försvaret så är jag glad och nöjd.
User avatar #62 to #34 - cppaulsson (04/02/2014) [-]
ja vi måste ju kunna kriga mot ryssland. oh wait...
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